to think there should be no such thing as a SAHM

[TalkinPeace2]

they might be an ex investment banker
or a part time nurse
or a part time teacher
or an active volunteer in the community
BUT
in these days where most women are educated at least to 18, very few did not work before kids
and very few will not work when their kids are older
so actually should define themselves by their personal achievements - currently undertaking a prolonged break
rather than some sort of domestic - which is what SAHM implies to me.

There was a new girl on Take me Out this weekend described herself as a 'full time mum.'

So does that make people who work part time mums? When i go back to work after maternity leave do i have to check my motherhood at the door? Full time mum is an offensive term in my book...

And also I can't help but wonder he she's funding her 'full time' mothering as doesn't have a partner.

I have no problem with sahm. As long as working mums are not expected to pay for it....

Scottish I can't talk for others but I measure how hard I have 'worked' by how exhausted I am after a day of looking after the DC and to be honest I couldn't give a monkeys about how others judge/measure it.

But they are asking if it has a monetary value to it?

because we are all economic units of production and consumption we are valued only for what we are worth and what we are worth is measured in money.

Every worker in every job can be replaced tomorrow...whether you're cleaning toilets or running the country.

But no-one can ever replace a parent imo (well not a decent one)

Perhaps that's why SAHMs tend to be proud to describe themselves as being just that, rather than

It just depends on which job means more to you....horses for courses and all that.

Rowan The full-time mummy label is a whole other thread and debate!

I can't speak for how your woman on TV funds her full time mum status but I'm quite happy to admit that my DH funds my SAHM status.

physical fatigue isn't rate one has worked,or indeed whether one works
housewife fatigue isn't comparable to job fatigue
job you have external demand,deadline,tasks.housewife you take break when wanted,no one monitors output

I have no problem with sahm. As long as working mums are not expected to pay for it....

but you'll be jolly glad that single Mum bred a child so disadvantaged it wipes your bottom in old age.

Mini "we are valued only for what we are worth and what we are worth is measured in money"

What a sad way to look at life. I am valued in many more ways than that.

Scottish your break theory is flawed, I work, self employed, it's still work and I take a break just when I like. When I was employed, guess what I took a break when I liked and had a huge amount of autonomy over my time.

Argh UABU.

It's bad enough now when people say what do you do
Me: sahm
Them: oh what did you do
Me:
Them: erm so you must have been thrilled to give up?
Me: no, I loved my job. I'm very good
Them:

I dread to think that giving a run down of my qualifications what do. Certainly bugger potential friendships

what an inane comment Molly,sentimental schlock but no content
why would child of single mum necessarily wipe arises as opposed to professional job
do you assume single parent offspring destined to wipe arises?

let's not pretend housewife's a job,it most certainly isn't.it's individual work in own home

But it becomes a job when you pay a child minder, cleaner, gardener, cook etc etc to do it, doesn't it?

Those are all 'valid jobs' that I would have to pay someone else to do if I wasn't here to do them.

Don't get me wrong, I don't see it as a 'job' particularly...I see it as a pleasure.

But having said that, I know people in paid jobs who see what they do as a pleasure too.

That's why I hate the "what do you do?" question Honey. It always ends up awkward. If someone asks me it I just engineer a reason to run away. I have quite a fancy job title and people get all interested but when I explain it's all a bit "Oh..." Sigh. I only talk about people's jobs if it comes up naturally in conversation.

mini if you're self-employed presumably you have charge out rate and profit margin
you work,self-employed selling your skills/labour for remuneration?

RememberMumsTheWord, yes thankfully some people are capable of valuing people for more than just their paid employment status but sadly most will judge. Which is why we all even have to ask the question "What do you do?" and then scratch our heads wondering if SAHP is a worthwhile choice up there with earns a fat bonus in the city. I don't value people as econmoic units......our economic system does.

At least your interesting - I'm just a bastard

Scottish You're damn right I take a break if I want too! I don't understand what point you are trying to make. I keep agreeing with you.

No, I don't work, I don't have a job but I do work hard in my role of SAHM, surely that is simple to understand??

I am trying to get across that just because a SAHM is not in paid employment does not mean that she doesn't exert effort. Effort can be exerted (and fatigue created) in paid work, in voluntary work and in the home. The nature of the roles are very different, some have ways of measuring success, others don't. Some can be considered more valuable in some ways, others more valuable in other ways.

I believe that this doesn't make one better than the other, maybe your point is that you believe yourself better than me because you are in paid employment?

I wish I was still a SAHM.. Got bloody work tomorrow.

I'm not interesting Honey - I'm disappointing :( I tried to explain what I do to some of my relatives and they were just baffled!

I pay for childcare,gardener,window cleaner,cleaner all legit jobs paying tax/ni
by paying tax/ni there is fiscal return to govt. they're incime generating in economy
housewife individually doing all these tasks is individual act,no return via tax/ni

Aaaaw your like Chandler in friends aren't you? do you get glazed looks once you try to explain too?

Mini what a vile thing to say.

I'm from a single parent family. My mum worked hard as a teacher but didnt take any form of promotion until I was 15 as didn't want to take more time away.

I'm grateful for the fact she worked hard and made sacrifices for me. I'm also grateful that she showed the importance of having a career and the fulfilment it can bring.

I believe children do better if a parent works and there is some form of financial security.

I also believe in the welfare state. But not so someone can stay at home with their child as a choice while the rest of us have to leave our children to fund it.lt isn't for lifestyle choices but necessity....

Yup. My job title sounds very snazzy, and then people want to know more, and it's all so complicated and boring, they just lose interest. So I just run away instead!

is that a barbed put down?
oh dear
friends? that's for nostalgic has beens

scottish, she was talking to me.