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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

who was the idiot who said that size12/14 was 'chubby'?

328 replies

mrsfuzzy · 25/10/2012 08:13

spitting feathers over an article i read yesterday in the newspaper about this subject. it's common knowledge that the average size is 16 and over in this country so how would that make a lot of women feel? does it really matter what your size? also why the emphasis on women why not men? many of them carry weight, noone seems to say anything about it. we all come in various shapes, sizes and colours and everyone is unique and beautiful in their own way be it inside or out. media should stop giving us these so called ideals and let us decide for ourselves how we wish to look.

OP posts:
TessOfTheBurbervilles · 25/10/2012 11:33

I've seen a handful of people on the thread imply that a size 14 is chubby, no question about it kind of thing.

My best friend is 6ft 4, she is a size 14, and is nowhere near chubby. Even at a size 16, she's still within the healthy weight range for her height. The smallest she has been is a 12, any smaller and she'd be underweight, which is just as dangerous as being overweight.

Less focus on clothes sizes is what is needed, and more focus on actual weight, because women being underweight simply to get into a certain size is not the path to go down either. Being seriously underweight carries many of the same health risks that being seriously overweight does. We don't want to replace one problem for the NHS with another.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 25/10/2012 11:33

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/6148456.stm

European BMIs here...

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 25/10/2012 11:34

news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/6148456.stm

Alisvolatpropiis · 25/10/2012 11:35

I think sizes are essentially meaningless,it depends on the individual woman's build. Even if a women is quite sort 5'3 and under,it doesn't meant she will be built like a pixie.

I think regardless of height,if you have a narrow build you will look "chubbier" in a particular size next to a person of the same height with a different build in the very same size.

I look bloody awful over a size 10 because I have a small build but I have friends who are size 12/14 and I would never consider them to be chubby,it's the right weight/size for them!

Along with magazine articles like the one OP mentioned I hate the ones that have celebrities and their weight. Because they're wholly fictitious. In one I read,5'10 beautiful curvy Kelly Brook apaprently weighed 8.7 stone. At that height she'd be a stick if she weighed so little. It's so unrealistic.

NewFaceNeeded · 25/10/2012 11:35

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GColdtimer · 25/10/2012 11:36

Thank you everyone (I don't feel at all pretty this morning which is why I chopped my head of in that photo Smile. and no, not just about to do a Victoria's secret show, I shudder at the thought. I think the responses from:

-you look normal
-you look a bit heavy around the middle with chunky calves
-you look more than chubby

show that much of this is subjective. Yes, of course being overweight is not healthy and I know I am carrying more weight than I'd like (can't get it off since I had dd2 and hit 40). However, I think the fact that some people think I look normal and other think I look "more than chubby" shows that its not just about what is "healthy".

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 25/10/2012 11:37

But normal in the UK does not equal healthy!

MummytoMog · 25/10/2012 11:38

I'm 5'2". 12-14 is chubby on me. ATM I am a 10-12 and pretty happy with my figure, but I weigh the best part of 11 stone. Not sure how, but it means that when I visit the GP, I get shouted at for being obese.

RightsaidFreud · 25/10/2012 11:40

If any of you are interested in finding out an accurate measurements of your body fat % (not using those rubbish scales that don't measure anything) keep an eye out for local uni's sports and exercise centers doing something called DXA scans. They are used to measure bone density, and give very accurate measurements of bone density/muscle mass/body fat.

Though, you might not like what you find out.

I'm 5ft 8, 9 stone 7, size 10, and i'm 30% fat. Thats at the very top of the 'normal' catagory. I'm known as 'skinny fat'. Exercise is vital, not just for weight loss, but overall health.

DontmindifIdo · 25/10/2012 11:41

Autumn - I did say earlier, as I'm rather short (5'0) at size 8 I don't have a flat tummy and my thighs are a bit out of proportion, but not bad, still slim and healthy looking - at size 10 I'd have a gut and my face would start expanding, at size 12 i'd be proper fat - but then I have a very small frame. I don't have anywhere to 'put' any excess weight (sadly, it never goes on the boobs), if you're short an extra 5lbs shows so much more than the same extra weight on someone half a foot taller.

That doesn't mean that everyone who's a size 12 will look fat, but if you my height, you can't be above a size 10 and look slim. That's just too wide for the height.

I won't join in the "oh I eat fry ups every morning and cream cakes four times a day" because a) it's not true and b) it's not helpful to suggest that woman who are thin are only thin because they are naturally that way, it suggests to overweight woman that there's nothing they can do about their figures and c) you can be thin but very unhealthy if you don't have a good diet.

I do have to watch what I eat normally (early stages on pregnancy here so will eat whatever I can keep down), but that isn't a judgement on those who don't, I want to 'maintain' this weight not have to lose anything later on, it just seems easier to stay one size than go up then down again.

As for men - I tend to find men are unbelievely cruel and insulting about each other's weight, in a way woman would never be to each other's faces. And I also don't find fat/overweight men attractive.

mrsfuzzy · 25/10/2012 11:42

twofalls, yep, you got it all in two barrels but how do feel about yourself, do you feel the need to be healther ? i would be interested to know how many posters on this thread consider themselves healthy but actually smoke [i'm an ex smoker] and drink more than the recommended amount a week, sorry everyone i'm turning into nanny! it's a free choice we are all adults and i'm not trying to put anyone down i respect peoples choices but am just curious all the same.

OP posts:
RawShark · 25/10/2012 11:43

rightsaid freud. I think that was what I was getting at!

geegee888 · 25/10/2012 11:43

Cotedazur no, I understand English well enough. Its just that I find you somewhat bossy and your comments derogatory and a bit insulting. We can all find something to criticise, particularly in virtual strangers of the internet but try to remember that not everyone is the same, nor wants to be. Sorry -Dutch directness again.

weegiemum · 25/10/2012 11:44

I'm 5ft10 and an 18.
And yes, I might be overweight, but I'm 7st lighter than this time last year, when I was a badly depressed size 28! I'm quite happy to be "chubby" as I'm no longer morbidly obese!

GColdtimer · 25/10/2012 11:44

thank you digestives (now digestiveswithcheese, they will make you chubby!). I used to be very pear shaped with a tiny waist and a huge arse but 2 children later I am much curvier so I am now actually in proportion.

Whilst I am probably a stone over my ideal I am very active, and eat very healthily. Not sure what my point is really but I think its interesting that a group of people can have such different ideas about what consitute "fat". I remember a thread about holly willoghby where people were saying she looked fat. No I think she looks great but perhaps that is because I identify more with curvier women. Not really sure what my point is now.....

weegiemum · 25/10/2012 11:44

I also have a large frame. Size 10 feet!

BegoniaBampot · 25/10/2012 11:46

For me a size 12-14 is getting chubby and I'm just over 5 ft. Just too many chubby folk about.

GColdtimer · 25/10/2012 11:47

Well done weegie!

DaPrincessBride · 25/10/2012 11:49

I'm 5'10 and I look my best at a 12 - I'm not a petite build so any less looks odd and I've only once managed to get to that size, it was impossible to maintain. At a 16 (currently, dammit) I think I look fat. Anything in between seems to be OK. But it's all relative, isn't' it.

digerd · 25/10/2012 11:50

Some women are lucky, where they put the weight on. Typically, it is bums tums/waist and thighs, but my sister and another lady I know, put the weight on their face and busom - not fair.

TwinkleReturns · 25/10/2012 11:51

I find threads like this worrying.

Yes the average size 16 is due to lots of people being overweight. Yes some people overeat. yes we have an issue with obesity in this country.

BUT, we also have an issue with the fact that a lot of woman are never happy with their bodies. Like the lady upthread who said that she was slim but her thighs rubbed together (which is actually normal. Even when I was underweight my thighs still rubbed together.)

Being overweight is not healthy but carrying a few pounds extra at various times (weight fluctuates) is not something women should panic about and address instantly. Weight fluctuates and if you eat a balanced diet and are fairly active that weight will come down as much as it goes up. It worries me that so many women weigh themselves daily or weekly and try to redress the balance if they've gone up a few pounds without understanding that your body will have either gained for a reason (at certain times in the menstrual cycle) or that you will naturally be less hungry over the following days to balance it out.

As a teenager (due to abuse at home) I was underweight. I varied from 6.5 stone to 7.5 stone. After having DD is was close to 10stone. I wasn't fat, I looked like I was carrying a bit more than I praps needed to but I wasnt fat. That weight naturally dropped down to 9stone where it levelled out. At that weight I still had a wobbly tummy, thighs that rubbed together and quite a shapely bottom. I dont look as thin as I used to. However I do look healthy, to lose anymore and keep it off I would need to do a lot of exercise and eat v little fats or sugars. That to me indicates that I am at my natural weight. To deprive my body of key elements of my diet and exercise at a level which would become difficult to maintain with a toddler and day to day commitments just to look thinner is unhealthy. If bits look wobbly I'll make sure I always take the stairs and do a few tummy exercises to tone them up but I wont lose weight and most importantly I dont worry about it or feel that I dont look thin enough.

Unfortunately I think we will continue to have a society which has extremes. People who are overweight and people who are at a healthy weight yet feel they dont look thin enough and so diet or are unhappy with how they look. And sadly many of our daughters are going to pick up on that and the cycle starts again.

DigestivesWithCheese · 25/10/2012 11:52

twofalls - Holly Willoughby is a great example, along with Kelly Brook. I often look at the dresses Holly is wearing and how much they flatter her shape. If I had a genuinely curvy, hourglass type shape then I would be totally happy with being a couple of dress sizes bigger, especially as it seems that some women have that shape & a quite a flat belly.

Unfortunately for me, if I put on weight, I still have twig thin arms and lower legs, a flat chest and small waist but just with lots of fat on my lower belly bum and hips Sad When I was losing my pregnancy weight last time, I managed to have a size 8 top half but was in size 14 bottoms - not a good look for me!

digerd · 25/10/2012 11:52

Also very much depends on the proportions, which is genetic.

RawShark · 25/10/2012 11:52

digerd Bosom weight sounds OK to me Grin

geegee888 · 25/10/2012 11:53

Twofalls according to some on here, I'm judgemental and shallow, and I'm used to looking at other runners so this is my honest opinion of your photo.

I would say you look slim rather than fat. I also think you are wearing one of those dresses which covers up most sins. You could be a little apple shaped just now and possibly lose a bit of weight and look more sleek. But not yet at the stage of having to worry about visibly looking overweight, more a matter of personal preference.

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