to pretend that state school is not so bad...

[RichTeas]

We are in an area with no shortage of preps and indies; the state schools are not bad, but for us, definitely not the preferred option. Yet it looks like it's going to be state all the way through. So far DS (Y3) doesn't have any idea of the types of schools that exist, as we have never openly discussed it, but I expect soon he will be clued up enough to question the system he finds himself in. It feels disingenuous to fib that we're happy with just a state education (when we're not), yet we don't want him to grow up feeling he's missed out by over-egging the independents. I suppose it could be worse, he could be in private and then forced to come out, but the issues is the same I wonder how others explain this kind of mismatch...

scarlettsmummy, yeah, woooh, let's live and let live. But don't you have a view on how other kids get on? It's really easy to talk about what we do with regard to our kids (we wouldn't be on this stupid website, at this time of night when I need to go to bed) if we didn't care about our kids, but what about everyone else?

"That's very interesting! I knew Margaret thatcher wasn't but had presumed she was the exception."

That's what Labour would like you to think.

The current crop are mostly private school and many public school. Not really a good advert!

But if the state schools are all as good as everyone seems to be saying why would you care if someone else chose to go private? How does a private school have any detriment on a state school if only a very small percentage of children actually go to them? And how would their existence impact on the quality of teaching at a completely separate school?

It sounds to me that there a good and bad schools in both sectors.

Domino
I just did a quick bit of googling, I hadn't realised that the shadow cabinet had quite a few privately educated people in it. It may not be as many as the cabinet but the difference isn't as big as I thought.

Yes the images of the parties are often not the same as the truth.

I don't disapprove of private schools at all. Just as long as they don't have charity status, as many do, which enable them reduce their tax liability.

I do have a problem with state funded schools which are able to select by faith/exam etc. Don't see why i should pay for this.

"I don't get the tutoring thing .. It's sad more than anything."

What's really sad is that people feel the need to tutor. It IS really sad that children spend up to seven hours at school and still have to come home and do a couple of hours work, all before the age of eleven. You have to ask yourself why parents do this. They don't hate their children, or want to get rid of the hundreds of pounds it costs them. They don't want to see their children weeping with tiredness. They want to see their children learn everything they need to learn at prmary state at school. Why do parents do it? The obvious answer -- the school is not offering what the child needs.

How to solve the problem? Look at what children are not getting during school hours and offer it to them.

The only thing parents would then have to do is practice those IQ type tests with a £5 book from WHS.

If they don't have charity status they should have tax relief status.

Tax relief..and why, exactly? If I drive a car because I don't like buses I don't get tax relief.

Just a little note on the social aspect of private schools. I went to a private girls school at age 11 after passing the exam and my parents scraping together the money. I felt very lucky to be there at first, but the constant bitching about who had what shoes, and who lived in a big house etc soon left me feeling inadequate and lonely. I wasn't the only girl there whose parents didn't have much cash, but I was bullied mercilessly for having a cheap woolworths tennis racket, non designer shoes and school bag, and for living in a not so big house in a not so nice area. I left school with excellent a levels and a place at a good university, but with a complete lack of self confidence and feelin like I wasn't quite good enough. I often wonder what would have happened if I had gone to the local comp, my older sister did, whereas my younger sister went to the same private school as I did. Looking at the three of us now, you wouldn't know from our career, manners or way of life who went private and who went to the state school. We are all moderately successful, intelligent women with good qualifications. Whilst my younger sister and I both undoubtedly had better tuition and more opportunities at the private school, lack of these doesn't seem to have caused my older sister significant difficulties in her adult life!

There is a lot less of the "keeping up with the Jones' " at my daughters independent school than at the state school she was previously at. Between parents and children. In fact she has been made aware how fortunate she is.

There are good and bad in both sectors. There is no doubt my children are given opportunities at the independent that were not possible at state. But the state school where we are is awful. If I had a good state school within reach I would not be paying for their education.

Unfortunately some people seem to see private education as a status symbol for themselves.

if i had the money i would send my boys to private school but i,m a staff nurse and dh works in a warehouse so unless we get a big lottery win its unlikely to happen having said that i know loads of people who went to private school and did nt do all that well equally i know pleanty of people who went to comprehensive and have done brillantly

If I had the money I wouldn't send the DSs private. They are too happy where they are.

Exactly Everlong. I moved DS1 from one High school to another because he was unhappy. I have found him what I think is the best school ever. He is happy, I am happy. That's it really.
It's interesting that there are children there that have been taken out of private education to go there. They are happy too.

so you don't have the money to go private shame that you need to send your children to an awful state school

I have nothing against private education I do have a problem when people turn noses up at state schools and the pupils that go to them

It's dependent on so many things like area etc. The children I know of weren't moved for financial reasons-they were unhappy where they were. Unless that's a ruse to cover up financial problems? Not thought of that.

But mrsjay it is no difference to the people slagging off folk whose children attend private.

ach your right my first post is so sarcastic just really gets on my nerves sometimes

At my DDs STATE secondary school (800 pupils) the girls sportsas part of the PE curriculum are:-
hockey (astro turf)
netball
lacrosse
badminton
tennis
volleyball
rock-it ball
gymnastics
basketball
climbing (own climbing wall)
girls football
girls rugby
X country running
athletics

You have made my morning with your talk of Marco Polo and Duck duck goose though!!

These threads are always full of desperate indi parents desperately trying to justify to themselves why thay are spending a small fortune on school fees (for reasons other than the brag factor!)