To of phoned the school and asked them to withdraw this?

[quoteunquote]

The year 7 have been set homework to share in class,

What makes you frightened and why?
When did this fear start?

I know that amongst DS's friends there are children with serious medical situations going on, children with parents with terminal illness, children with dead siblings, children with a dead parent, children that have suffered serious sexual abuse, children in care, a child who's older sibling has had recently very nearly successful suicide attempts, and children with parents who have mental illness, and children who are facing homelessness.

I feel that this is a situation where, "Can opened and worms all over the place." will sum up the situation nicely,

I don't feel that children sharing these kind issues with their peers is going to do either side much good, even the children sharing normal fears are going to be laid open to teasing.

I know that the children that are receiving counselling and support are having that structured very carefully, none of the people proving those services have been contacted to advice on this.

So my first AIBU, strapping hat on.

is a link to the thread I started last night, asking this question in chat, without the reason why, I did so as I wanted to see what responses to such a question would be, because I have now have phoned the school to express concern, I thought I would ask for the MN views while I wait for someone to phone me back.

I think that a general descriptive piece on fear or writing about a person who might be an aracnophobic would be ok.

Yanbu. I can still remember the hideous consequences of being encouraged to over share by a teacher in Y7. I think at 11/12 when many children are in a new environment, naïve, eager to please and completely trusting of teachers and authority, it is irresponsible to probe like this en masse. I haven't forgiven that teacher for making me vulnerable and exploiting my innocent position without a thought for the consequences.

AyeOpps -I am a fully trained drama practitioner and I would never ask children this sort of thing without putting in place a mechanism such as ElinorBellowed describes when she says:
"If I ever set anything sensitive (I teach English) I would vet them before sharing in class. I also regularly let them know that they never have to tell me anything personal, in written or oral work." THAT is good training.

Shagmund was partly trained when she made the mistake she made.

The fact that the OP knows of specific children who may find this subject difficult is almost by the by, really - some questions are better than others and allow fro any eventuality - you can't ever know what might be going on.

I was wondering with drama it must be a fine line to walk, it must sometimes bring up some difficult feelings with children.

I know that the drama therapy that some children have taken part in has been evocative and useful, but that has been when the all involved are aware at possible outcomes and with careful support in place.

I really don't like this idea.

For some reason it doesn't sit well with me, particularly given that it's part of an R.E lesson. I can't even articulate why it bothers me so much, just that it does- and I am usually very accepting of lesson choices.

That's the thing: Drama and Dramatherapy are very different things and any reputable drama workshop leader will know the difference and keep well clear of any excercises or techniques designed to be therapeutic - which should be left to trained dramatherapists, and has a totally differnet purpose and function.

Training enables professional actors to get right down there into simulating emotion...but it's all too easy to get a group of teens worked up and out of control of their emotions - v irresponsible and unethical.

It's more the sort of thing CAHMS ask tbh. I wouldn't have expected it in school? I just asked ds2 if he's been asked this,he's year 7, and he said no (with a very confused face). He has been asked about fears with CAHMS though but he has phobias.

I just think it's strange but it wouldn't bother me but then as you say the dcs are all different, with different problems.

Maybe what would be good would be if we had those newsletters with all the topics and curriculum areas they cover very early.

Because come to think of it, DS's first few history lessons in Yr7 were all around personal history - write your own personal timeline, choos an object from your childhood and write about what someone could learn about you or your life from this object, etc.

And then, as with the 'worst thing' question, parent or carer would know in advance and would manage or support the child, or contact the teacher.

I do sympathise with teachers - they are cnstantly under scrutiny and criticism from all and sundry, but there's also a place for constructive feedback or comment.

When DD2 was about 11 the class had to write a horror story and they all wrote the usual ghosts, zombies, blood and spiders everywhere tripe except for one girl who wrote about watching her mother die in Ethiopia and her realisation that she had to go to live in a far off orphanage with her older sister, and possibly never see her home again. Obv she didn't as she was not in Ethiopia when she wrote..

It really seems quite a voyeuristic exercise on the part of the teacher.

I don't for one moment think that secondary teachers know the backgrounds of any but their own tutor group in any great detail, so I think they're treading on dangerous ground with things like this.
I also hate PHSE lessons in primary schools as most teachers (and TAs) are not trained to deal with some stuff that can come up. And it's often done in PPA time.
My primary even sent some TAs on 'counselling courses' and have set up a system where they can have groups or one-to-one with troubled children. How dangerous is that? Well-meaning amateurs are no subsitute for trained professionals.

Part of the problem is in my case DS would be very happy to share his background and fears in class if a teacher tells him to. But what you are happy to share at 7/11/13 is necessarily what you want all your schoolmates to know when you're 14/15/16 when you have more fully processed it and also realised how mean people can be.

I agree with Blu and others.

There is no reason for year 7s to be set homework, or have class discussions, that could be highly distressing (same as the crucifixion thread). Year 7s often misunderstand hw, or interpret it too literally or just wrongly, they do not know each other or the system, and school is not automatically safe or therapeutic. Even if your fear is spiders, you may feel forced to disclose something you consider personal and/or shameful in an unfamiliar environment.

I also think there are ways of setting homeworks that make drawing upon personal experience optional: do a timeline for your life or that of someone you admire or are interested in; do a family tree in French and feel free to make things up - the more skydiving grandmothers the better, etc etc. People are sensitive about all sorts of things, that is part of being human, and outside schools it is considered bad manners to press those issues (unless therapeutically).

YANBU
In principle in RE, I think it's great to ask:

What makes us frightened and why?

It's basically precisely why religions were invented; impression management of pain and death.

However, I think it is inviting difficulties to ask for specific details.
Having said that it could go very well and the discussion could be very enlightening for everyone.

I don't think it was unreasonable to phone the school. When my daughter became unwell at the beginning of the year she was extremely stressed and vulnerable. She took part in a group where she was made aware of the problems other kids had and that just stressed her out even more
Yes the children might talk about a simple fear. But if a child does express thoughts about any very serious matter will the teacher have the training to cope?

I think Cumfy and TwoTerrors make good points - use of a device to make the subject non-personal, or theoretical, or fictional are good ways to explore difficult territory.

In drama, role play creates a thin veil of fiction through which youngh people can try out ideas and express opiions, in role as a character, for example.

I wish I had given the school my thoughts on the 'worst thing that has ever happened to me' excercise DS was set.