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AIBU?

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Original poster

mothers who plan to bottle feed should take in their own milk

307 replies

thebeesnees79 · 29/09/2012 13:12

If a woman decided prior to baby being born they shouldn't expect the hospital to provide bottles and milk they should bring their own?
Why should the nhs give out milk? aibu?

OP posts:
bumperella · 29/09/2012 22:13

Women who intend to FF may not actually be "lazy" or "bad". Maybe it's for reasons that are personal but that you would support if you only knew?

If your argument is purely based on economics, then I would be suprised if the cost to the NHS was significant in the grand scheme of things, esp if compared with the cost of advertising the benefits of BF (and the cost of the -generally- woefully inadequate BF support).
NHS-provided formula for hospital stays is not going to make a difference in who does and doesn't BF.

LonelyCloud · 29/09/2012 22:13

OP, my local hospital already has a policy where pregnant women are told to bring in their own bottles and formula if they are planning on formula feeding. They claim not to have any formula available on the post-natal ward, because they are a "breast-feeding friendly hospital".

Having said that, DS was born at 34 weeks and in SCBU for the first few weeks. He was fed mostly on expressed breast milk, with formula top-ups as necessary. The kitchen in SCBU was full of little UHT bottles of formula, in every brand available on the market, and this was given to formula fed babies in SCBU free of charge. Even if the mother said that she didn't want to try breastfeeding or expressing.

Incidentally, SCBU, the post-natal ward, and the maternity unit were all right next to each other. So a midwife on the postnatal ward would find it very easy to walk into SCBU and grab some ready made formula for a baby on the post-natal ward if it really was needed. Whether or not the midwives would actually do that is another question.

McHappyPants2012 · 29/09/2012 22:14

It is true, on the children's ward they do not provide food for the parents unless you are breast feeding. In my works you can buy a meal if there is food left over.

I think stopping the free milk would only work if the hospital allowed support 24/7 when I had dd my partner ( who was dd father) was allowed in 12-30 till 2-30 then 5-00 til 9-00. I was so down and teary had problems bf but got no support. Even after over 3 years I have not forgotten how awful that first day was.

brdgrl · 29/09/2012 22:17

Milk is food for the baby. Who is a patient.

NimChimpsky · 29/09/2012 22:19

Our hospital don't feed non bfing mothers. Isn't that standard?

bragmatic · 29/09/2012 22:23

Babies aren't patients. They're not exactly sick, are they?

I agree partner support should be allowed.

sookiesookie · 29/09/2012 22:27

They're not exactly sick, are they? labour is not a sickness either. WTF?

Hospitals are not feeding non bf mothers? What? how is that allowed? Thats appalling.

its not that way at my hospital I was fed and FF, due to having my breast removed.

Original poster
thebeesnees79 · 29/09/2012 22:35

ff or bf the mother has just given birth and should be given food and drink, you can't discriminate like that. I would never advocate something so ludicrous.
I never took formula to the hospital with either of my children (& won't with this baby) as I want to breast feed but on the other hand if I got into difficulty I would think the option of formula should be given. sorry if people have misunderstood what I was getting at. People should not be judged on ability to feed there children, for example babies born prem or by c section it might be harder/impossible for the mother to make milk because the body was not ready too. Or those who have had breasts removed etc, i wasn't judging.

OP posts:
wannabedomesticgoddess · 29/09/2012 22:40

My hospital provides formula indiscriminately and feeds everyone.

Im now starting to think its in a minority.

If anything, they forced me to eat when I had DD. I wasnt hungry and they practically marched me and DD to the dining room.

sookiesookie · 29/09/2012 22:41

Do you know what, I am usually really laid back but I am so angry at mother not being fed because they choose to ff. More so than the refusal to provide food for newborns.

Its disgusting I am so shocked that anyone (obviously someone hcp does) thinks that is ok. Talk about treating people like 2nd class citizens.

PickledFanjoCat · 29/09/2012 22:45

Op I'm not really sure what your point was, though as I said earlier if it was a way to save the nhs a little cash then there are loads of things we could all take in to dave them money.

I understand you didn't mean to sound discriminatory but it's a contentious issue which is why you are getting such heated responses!

Without getting into the whole ethical debate of not feeding non bf mothers, to make a new mum of a three day old baby, still recovering from the birth and struggling to bf, walk up to the canteen and leave her new baby is AWFUL.

mellen · 29/09/2012 22:47

Its standard practice in many hospitals to ask women planning to FF to bring in formula. It isn't fair to react to the OP as if she has just invented the idea, or that it is totally uninmaginable.

omfgkillmenow · 29/09/2012 22:48

They fed my firstborn a bottle (against my wishes but i didn't get asked) cos she went to special care, I wanted to BF, and I did after that, she was in special care cos had cord wrapped round neck and had swallowed meconium in the womb, I could have BF her easy. I gave birth at 03.15 and they didn't let me see her (a quick look but she was whisked away) till about 0800 and by then she had already been fed a bottle I was devastated I insisted on going to see her before my shower, was a long and difficult labour and I had had an epidural so I couldn't walk, but still they could have wheeled me there. Anyway bit late crying now, she turned 17 this week.

Original poster
thebeesnees79 · 29/09/2012 22:48

it must break human rights law to discriminate like that?
My hospital won't provide milk unless you ask or are struggling to feed baby. My midwife told me to top my baby up because they were concerned at how unsettled he was and how tired I was.

OP posts:
PickledFanjoCat · 29/09/2012 22:51

Well if you take the view (not necessarily mine) that the nhs feeds the patient then the bf mother needs feeding to feed the baby.

But surely in wards where this is the practice, rightly or wrongly, someone can use a bit of common sense & compassion for circumstances such as this?

I think it's very important a mother is with the baby however it is fed. So it's preferable to offer a mother at a babies bedside a bit of food to help her stay with the baby at a very difficult time.

McHappyPants2012 · 29/09/2012 22:52

Sookie I agree. I will go to the restaurant for the parents when I cover children wards. Can only do this on break time so around 10.

It is shocking that parents go without food and drinks for several hours, in adult ward patients get washed, changed and fed by nurses.... But in children's ward the parents do this yet some nurses will not even give a worried parent a slice of toast

wannaBe · 29/09/2012 22:55

I don't believe that there are hospitals that don't feed mothers who don't bf. sorry but I don't believe that's true or even legal.

PickledFanjoCat · 29/09/2012 22:58

There has been a thread on it here it certainly happens.

These are mothers who are NOT patients mind, it's not true on maternity wards it's children's wards where a baby has been readmitted.

Also but amiss of you to practically call a few of these posters fibbers!

sookiesookie · 29/09/2012 22:58

It isn't fair to react to the OP as if she has just invented the idea, or that it is totally uninmaginable.

I don't think people have, I for one have not suggested the OP came up with it. But said I oppose it, which i do.

i think that is what most people have said.

goldenlula · 29/09/2012 22:58

Sorry, I think I derailed the OP's point slightly. The point in my original post was that people are saying that the baby is not a patient on the maternity ward, but even when dd did become the patient they still would not feed her long term as they would a patient on 'normal food', so once weaned.

StanleyLambchop · 29/09/2012 23:01

My hospital said this about formula when I had dc1. By the time I had dc2 the policy had been changed because of a legal challenge brought by a mother, her solicitors argued that as the baby was in hospital too they had an obligation to feed it. The hospital backed down. The NHS has not gone bust (yet) because of this decision. YABU.

goldenlula · 29/09/2012 23:05

wannabe I have stated clearly that my experience of not being fed due to to being a bf'ing mum was on a children's ward, where dd had been admitted to straight after we were discharged from the local maternity unit. I can assure you I am telling the truth, I only found out I would not be fed when I asked where I got my breakfast. They grudgingly gave me 2 slices of toast about 15 mins later after I returned to dd's room in shock. I was told again that this was not normal practice and from then on I would need to sort my own food from the canteen.

andallthatjargon · 29/09/2012 23:06

All hospitals are different but I always assumed I could bf and never took any milk in with me, luckily I could (x3) as it sounds like my babies may have starved otherwise :o x

PickledFanjoCat · 29/09/2012 23:07

I think wannabe needs to start reading posts before opening gob.

goldenlula · 29/09/2012 23:09

to not

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