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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

mothers who plan to bottle feed should take in their own milk

307 replies

thebeesnees79 · 29/09/2012 13:12

If a woman decided prior to baby being born they shouldn't expect the hospital to provide bottles and milk they should bring their own?
Why should the nhs give out milk? aibu?

OP posts:

ReindeersGoldenBollocks · 29/09/2012 20:53

If someone chooses to FF they should be provided with milk for their baby.

Mothers have such short stays generally nowadays that actually, it's unfair to make mothers who have just laboured to make up bottles.

Their reasons for FF are irrelevant. Their babies still need food, so it should be provided.

qo · 29/09/2012 20:59

You don't think cost cutting could be seen as a valid reason, with funds freed up to be diverted elsewhere?

I'm not actually saying I agree (or disagree) with the OP, but I can see the point she was trying to make. And of course it should be able to be debated among adults without rudeness.

And on that note, I'm off to watch the deer hunter - sorry to post and run!

Fairyjen · 29/09/2012 21:10

Quite simply the OP original post said "why should NHS give out milk"? Because that's what I lay my bloody taxes for! I chose to ff both times went into hospital particularly first time expecting them to provide milk. The nhs has a duty of care to people under their roof including newborns.

I'm sorry the OP feels upset by the response particularly given your pregnant however you must realise the type of debate your question would spark. If this was truely a politically based cost cutting thread perhaps you could have worded the question differently. I for one was quite upset and offended by this

PickledFanjoCat · 29/09/2012 21:14

The saving would be negligible, particularly when viewed against how this WILL make some vulnerable mothers feel.

Why not save money in other ways ? Take your own poo paper? Tea bags?

To pluck this out as an example is a bit odd. Especially when it's such a important issue to some people.

hiviolet · 29/09/2012 21:15

Forgive me for stating the obvious, but women who plan to formula feed might, just MIGHT have an inkling that breastfeeding will be a disaster.

Me for instance. I believed the books when they said ALL women can breastfeed. The books clearly hadn't seen my nipples, which are so flat I may as well have tried to latch my DD onto the back of my hand. I starved the poor mite for five days, before joining the dots and realising the lack of urine, poo and jitteriness (low blood sugar, I now know) were pointing towards one thing.

Something tells me the same thing might happen again.

IneedAsockamnesty · 29/09/2012 21:21

when i had my first dc everything even down to vests and babygro's were provided and i felt rather bullied into ff apart from a maroon uniformed woman who very roughly grabbed and squeezed my breast in a rather strange attempt to help me.

with all my other dc's nothing was provided.unless baby was in scbu.

im a rather militant (what ever that means) pro breastfeeder and i still think they should provide formula but i do think it should be on request by the mother because i do think some staff do try to bully and just after giving birth a mum is rather suseptable to it.i also think bf support should be on request as well.

i have several friends who desperatly wanted to bf but left hospital feeling they had failed having been told things like bf was to much like hard work,they couldnt produce enough milk (tho how anybody would know that 6 hours after birth when no breast related medical conditions existed) and one who was told she shouldnt as she had been given pethadine. this poor woman belived that her pain relif impacted on her ability to bf.

sookiesookie · 29/09/2012 21:21

You don't think cost cutting could be seen as a valid reason, with funds freed up to be diverted elsewhere?

No the svaing would be negligable and there are other ways they could save money. Section births cost the NHS more than natural, should we refuse everyone sections and give them only to those who prove they need it?

Or less dramatically let stop gas and air or pethadine. Or water births. You don't need to give birth in a heated pool so lets charge for it or not do and divert the funds.

Babies are people too, the nhs feed all people staying in hospital.

GoldShip · 29/09/2012 21:23

Thanks gold ship I will eat nothing as I don't deserve food

No-one said anything about deserving. But you think babies should have food from home. Why shouldn't you then?

Why are you any different to another human being, doesn't matter whether your 1 day

GoldShip · 29/09/2012 21:24

...1 day old or 100 years old. You should be provided with food in hospital.

goldenlula · 29/09/2012 21:26

Out of interest even when a baby does become a patient, formula is not provided for them (well after the first 24 hrs maximum). Dd was discharged from the maternity unit at 2 days old and sent to the children's ward at 10pm. I had failed to feed her (so much for 3rd time lucky!). The next morning I was told to ensure someone brought up formula as they only provided it in an emergency.

GoldShip · 29/09/2012 21:30

That's not the same in my hospital (local) ^ that's really sad :(

goldenlula · 29/09/2012 21:39

Sorry, should have said that that is the case in my area, not necessarily all areas. They also rather grudgingly provided me with 2 slices of toast on the first morning as they do not feed non bf mums (that said I had to feed dd bottles at that point as she was refusing to latch and had already lost almost a lb in weight but still wanted, and did, try to feed her myself). They seemed to think it was totally ok to leave a 3 day old baby in a Room on her own while I left the ward completely, climbed 2 floors and queued for a meal in the canteen. Dd could not be heard crying if she was in the room on her own from the outside as I tested it when I went to te milk kitchen to get a bottle. I was also recovering from a c section.

PickledFanjoCat · 29/09/2012 21:43

I know they don't routinely provide food for non bf mothers who are out patients, but under those circumstances that's pretty fricking inhumane

Fairyjen · 29/09/2012 21:46

goldenlula OMG!!!! I can't believe that hospital has not been closed down! They don't feed non bf mums? How much more discriminatory can you get?!? Bastards!

goldenlula · 29/09/2012 21:50

Certainly didn't help me with my 3rd day baby blues, added to the fact that dd was my final chance to get it right and I failed. Again. Still makes me :( 17 months on! I should really have written a letter of complaint just didn't get round to it.

goldenlula · 29/09/2012 21:51

I was fed on the maternity ward, just not once I was discharged and sent to the children's ward, so they provided neither of us with food.

Fairyjen · 29/09/2012 21:53

I wrote and complained to hospital I gave birth in (post natal care was given at a different hospital due to sbcu needs) still waiting on a response from them 18wks on!

MrsHavisham · 29/09/2012 21:53

Goldenlula: that's atrocious!

Original poster

thebeesnees79 · 29/09/2012 21:54

golden that's disgusting & discrimination I can't believe that!!
I was admitted at 24 weeks with severe dehydration and had to have 3 bags of fluids over 24 hours. My hospital asked my dh if he wanted a sandwich or some dinner. I couldn't eat because I was too poorly. There is no way I would leave my baby new born on its own to go to the canteen and get dinner!

OP posts:

AGoldenOrange · 29/09/2012 21:55

goldenlula You didn't fail, the hospital did!

Jaffacakeeater · 29/09/2012 21:58

I bottle fed DTs and BF DS2. I expect equal support and certainly no judge pants. So so so so so sick to death of feeding snobbery.

goldenlula · 29/09/2012 21:59

I didn't. I waited until dh could get in, which was fortunate that this time dh had a few days off as with both ds' dh had already returned to work by this point as he is self employed and needed to earn money. He bought fruit and stuff and popped to the canteen for me.

wannabedomesticgoddess · 29/09/2012 22:00

That really is shocking.

When I was in with DD they gave my ex tea and toast and even gave my mum some the next day. I was supposed to be discharged but we were still there four hours later and they brought her tea and toast.

Original poster

thebeesnees79 · 29/09/2012 22:04

I am shocked that they would even expect that to be honest.

OP posts:

Jaffacakeeater · 29/09/2012 22:05

Outrageous

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