I live in a council flat - do not judge me!

[WhatABloodyMess]

DS2 had a friend round for tea yesterday (I brought them from school). When his mum picked him up she seemed rather perturbed that we live in a 3rd floor council flat in a shitty area of town. She was very red faced and flustered (maybe from the walk up the stairs which I have to do with a toddler and shopping at least 3 times a day?) and rather short with me saying 'How on earth did you end up living here'.

Now my DS has been attending his school for 5 years (now in Yr6) in a fairly affluent area as we used to live in this affluent area ourselves! We have never had this lad round before but DS has always played with him and I have always said 'hi' to his mum.

It took a lot of courage to invite a school friend of the DCs round as I am already very upset about living here so this has just made me feel 10 times worse.

This morning the mum completely blanked me and DS said his friend has said he can't come to his house.

AIBU to think that she must think I am scum now or something? The flat is very clean btw and DSs friend was quite happy.

What and laugh and love.

What IS your experience, princess?

In the 9 years we've lived in our council flat, it has never smelt of piss.

Eleanor Roosevelt said " No one can make us feel inferior without our consent"
If you are mummying you ds well, and providing food and clothing for him, you are doing brilliant.

WhatABloodymess before you moved into a council property, what was your view of them?

Sorry, PP your link does not work, and frankly I have lost interest.

I have looked at your photos PP.
I see a flat that needs decorating.

It looks alright to me. Like my first council flat.
I was thrilled. So excited to have my first real home.
I had it looking lovely in no time.

And the only time it smelt of pee was when the bins were full of nappies.

What is it you are trying to say because you are coming across like a total snob.

Is it that you have been given a place and you are dismayed at the state it is in?
If so, it is hardly indicative of the entire social housing stock AND you are hardly endearing yourself to others who are living in a similar situation to you.

Yep that flat looks like its previous occupants decorated it whilst tripping.

Reading some of your comments on your pics confirmed you're a nob though.

"Council flats (in my unfortunately considerable experience) are generally unrenovated Hellholes that most "civilised" people wouldn't let their dogs live in, and it can be a shock to the genteel folk when confronted with the usual ten thousand crimes against chipboard and ever abiding waft of stale piss."

That might be your experience, but in my experience all the council flats I've been in have been alright. They might not be anything special, but definitely not hellholes.

i come from a council estate,moved out and bought ,over the last 10yrs where i live now we have

dozens of blardy noisey students 3a.m

a crack den 5 doors down (now closed)

countless fights (local pub 2mins away)

heroin overdose (young mum died)next door to me

and the average price of a 3 bed here in this street is £250k

and believe it or not its not seen as a bad area

the council houses round here are well maintained and are like gold dust

im sure op if this idiot women took her blinkers of there probably is these sought of problems where she lives,its just it goes on more behind closed doors but shes fooling herself if she think "bad " things dont go on where she lives

It's not that bad.

I've been in worse, and they haven't been council properties!

It just needs a bit of cleaning and a bit of paint. I do like the comments about getting on to Shelter or writing to the papers though! I mean really? With so many people homeless or living in dangerous/unhealthy housing I very much doubt Shelter are going to care that the decor isn't any good.

She is clearly a dickhead with her head too far up her own arse to see what a sad little woman she is!!

As for "I'll have a black baby [...]"

I don't think people should be judged on where they live but how they look after what home they have, ie clean, tidy etc not where its situated.

To be honest 6 months ago I was desperate for a council home, they wouldn't help, I found somewhere privately but back then i would've given anything to have your place. Maybe miss uppety needs to find herself homeless and she will realise how amazing it feels to have a roof over your head.

Sorry if I offended anyone.

You so have to shame this woman! In front of other mums, ask why her son is no longer allowed over anymore.

This kind of snobbery is alive and well. I live on a new estate where some the housing is 'affordable housing'. I was horrified to discover that quite a few of my neighbours refuse to have anything to do with the tenants despite the fact that they are perfectly friendly familes with polite lovely children. Discrimination simply due to the fact they don't have a mortgage. There is also a similar attitude to those on the development who rent.

Shocking and embarrassing.

Yes Empusa the 'I could just have a brown baby and call her Latoyah. Ready made nursery then' got me too.

Racism is alive and kicking. PP poooey!

She is beneath your contempt op.

A total nobber.

People like that are seldom happy as there is always someone better off than them to be jealous about too.

She said WHAT?

There was me giving you the benefit of the doubt PP.

Shall we get into a conversation about your views on women who have black babies?

Right now? See were it takes us..

My DS is dual heritage.

Proud.

My five are all mixed race.
I have FIVE council houses.
They give you one for each.

I sublet them to bogus asylum seekers.

Disabled ones with free cars.

fact

And report.....

MrsDevere I do feel you are in a most u.fortunate situation. I got 20 free houses for my one child. Poor MrsDevere

,

Yours must be blacker than mine then.
You get extra points that way.

Ask PP, she'll tell you.

Its the law

See, this is where I don't understand MN. I spent most of my life on the Northside of Glasgow on a shitty council estate - one of the worst according to stats. I sent Dd to a 'good' school, in the hope that she may one day achieve something better than she was born into. In 6 years, she was never invited anywhere, not one birthday party or playdate ever. She came from the wrong area you see, so I never understand these threads - everyone saying it doesn't matter where you live, they'd be happy to send their DC's to play at someone's council house, that they're oh so cool about it. Not my experience, sorry.

As it happens, I spent those long lonely years as a single parent living in squalor studying for a degree - fast forward twelve years, and I'm now living in an idyllic Sussex village. Middle class heaven, you might say. No shortage at all with regard to invites now for my younger two DC's.

I don't know what goes on with Mumsnet sometimes. Is everyone being honest? I actually appreciate freddos posts, as I probably could do with some insight as to why Dd1 never went anywhere as a child