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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

TA told my five year old to 'mind her own business'

120 replies

RichardDawkinsAngel · 10/09/2012 22:54

There is every chance my DD was trying to give unwanted help and/or advice (although apparently the little boy concerned wanted her to help him with his picture). My DD said that the TA said it in a 'not nice way'. I think is an unacceptable thing to say to a five year old. Or am I being pfb? DD is in Y1 btw.

OP posts:
cestlavielife · 10/09/2012 22:56

did the TA tell you this is what she said?
or is it your child's version ?

Nagoo · 10/09/2012 22:56

Pfb. Based on th limited info. The op screams pfb at me :o

WorraLiberty · 10/09/2012 22:57

Oh my eldest was always being told to mind his own business at school....that's basically because he always had his nose stuck in someone else's Grin

SomebodySaveMe · 10/09/2012 22:57

Very PFB.

Rubirosa · 10/09/2012 22:57

Maybe your DD was being nosy?

Nagoo · 10/09/2012 22:57

She should have been getting on with her own work.

AngryBeaver · 10/09/2012 22:58

PFB a bit Smile although I totally remember what that was like (dd is 6 and I have 2 more to yet start school) I think they toughen up quite quickly when they start school...and us mums have to as well. I often tell my kids to "mind their own bees wax" . Your dd probably fely upset as it's a new situation, new person and she feels that she may be in trouble.
Did you tell her she wasn't and that TA just meant "get her with your own work"etc
She will soon get used to things

SoleSource · 10/09/2012 22:59

Oh my, therapy quick! How will DD cope in the real world.

AngryBeaver · 10/09/2012 22:59

sorry for typos, am rushing

SaggyOldClothCatPuss · 10/09/2012 23:00

You'll probably learn the hard way, as we all do that how a child sees things, and how they actually happen can often be quite different!
I've stomped into the classroom in high dudgeon on more than one occasion, to leave looking slightly crestfallen, having been put in my place by the teacher!
By all means, ask the teacher/TA about it, but be prepared for a reasonable explanation.

AngryBeaver · 10/09/2012 23:01

oh good god woman! I just saw dd hasn't just started,she's in year 1! As my dh would say, catch yourself on!

kim147 · 10/09/2012 23:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

squeakytoy · 10/09/2012 23:02

PFB..

CoolaSchmoola · 10/09/2012 23:03

Agree with Nagoo and yes, a bit PFB... If my PFB said that to me I would have said "well you should have been concentrating on your own picture/work" - I wouldn't be defending her against the TA who corrected her behaviour.

Please don't be one of those parents who has issues with their child not being treated as PFB at school. If she was focusing on someone elses picture she wasn't doing what she was meant to - which can't be ignored - it's the TA's job to tell her to do what she's meant to be doing instead of watching/helping someone else (unless the teacher or TA has asked her to) and "mind your own business" means precisely that - it's another way of saying "go do what you are meant to be doing".

apostropheuse · 10/09/2012 23:03

I suppose you really don't know the full story. She may have been told several times in a very nice way before being told "not in a nice way"!

Anyway, what does "not in a nice way" actually mean to a five year old? Perhaps it was just in a firm voice. Who knows?

CoolaSchmoola · 10/09/2012 23:03

Wow - I appear to have lost my grammar! That's one hell of a long sentence lol.

HolyParalympicGoldBatman · 10/09/2012 23:05

PFB.

She should mind her own business.

Greensleeves · 10/09/2012 23:07

Unnecessarily rude imo - I would not speak to a child like that in school (I do say "beeswax" to my own children though).

Not a nice way to talk to a 5yo.

PandaNot · 10/09/2012 23:07

Yes, PFB. I often say that to my dc and in the classroom might have said it on occasion to children who should have been getting on with their own jobs instead of interrupting others.

kim147 · 10/09/2012 23:08

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
RichardDawkinsAngel · 10/09/2012 23:09

Ok, it looks like I am being pfb. DD had a rough year in reception in a few ways so I am a bit sensitive for her perhaps. And, for the record I did, of course tell her that it was perfectly reasonable of Mrs X to say that and that I hoped she did as she was told :-)

OP posts:
bobbledunk · 10/09/2012 23:11

It's a perfectly acceptable thing to say to someone poking her nose in other peoples business, if she doesn't want to hear it again then she knows what not to do...Grin You are being very pfb, don't expect the rest of the world to treat her with awe and amazement, they won't.

bobbledunk · 10/09/2012 23:11

Sorry, missed your last message!

totallypearshaped · 10/09/2012 23:12

I think it's a bit rude to say mind your own business to an adult, let alone a child who will model that behaviour.

Whether I'd take it further I don't know: I'd let your DD know that she can expect better in her life than that rudeness - that she's entitled to be treated with respect and politeness in her place of work.

No doubt she'll learn a lesson from this - just make sure it doesn't teach her to withdraw into herself after a set back.

waterlego6064 · 10/09/2012 23:12

YAprobablyBU.