TA told my five year old to 'mind her own business'

[RichardDawkinsAngel]

There is every chance my DD was trying to give unwanted help and/or advice (although apparently the little boy concerned wanted her to help him with his picture). My DD said that the TA said it in a 'not nice way'. I think is an unacceptable thing to say to a five year old. Or am I being pfb? DD is in Y1 btw.

agree pearshaped

there is no need to be rude to a child. Presumably that isn't the way they want the children to speak to others.

My gripe was not with her being spoken to about her behaviour, more about the phrase itself.

I don't know, I don't think I would speak to a child in that way and I don't teach any as young as Y1.

I will tell a child that something is 'not their business', 'nothing to do with them' or 'nothing that concerns them' but somehow 'mind your own business' sounds blunter and harsher.

I don't think YAB completely U.

Nothing wrong with that. Mabey she was being nsey and should mind her wn business

"Mind your own business" sounds very harsh to my adult ears, there are surely more appropriate ways to get that message across? "Look at your own work", or even "beeswax" instead of business. I wonder where that phrase came from anyway?

Jeez as a child I gt told constantly to mind my own, no it never dd me any harm

So was I, but I can remember being told it and actually stinging my ears and making me cringe! Admittedly I was a very sensitive child

Why is "beeswax" better? I wouldn't want that kind of thing "modelled" to my children. If they are being nosy / misbehaving / inattentive I expect the teacher or TA to tell them clearly and firmly.

Without actually having been there, we don't know whether the TA was smiling when she said it. It might sound a harsh remark but it depends entirely on how it's said. The child's interpretation of how it was said may not be exactly how it was.

I can't see anything wrong with mind your wn business. Would they even know what beeswax meant?

PEEEEEEEEEEE

EFFFFFFFFFFFFFF

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

PFB
Maybe you should say it more often yourself.

I tell my 2.10 DS1 to mind his own business. He's always getting involved in other people's dinners, trying to help other children put their shoes on, turning around in his chair in restaurants etc etc.

As long as not said with a smile and not harshly, I think it's a perfectly acceptable way of telling them to focus on their own task in hand!

I don't think it's a very nice way to speak to anyone - adult or child - but sometimes we have shorter tempers and are snappier than we should be.

You can say it in a perfectly nice way and OP wasn't there.

is said with a smile

It's perfectly fine. However it was said.

The TA might have said the same thing as nicely as possible quite a few times before she said "mind your own business please" to get the message across. It sounds like the kind of thing I would have said when a child was being really interfering and perhaps upsetting another child in the process. Sometimes a child jumping in and getting in the way of someone else's work result in the other child feeling picked on. It is a little rude but sometimes you have to be firm if a child isn't listening and it's a darn sight better than saying "shut up" or "get out of the classroom."

I thought that too Cailin, the TA may have already said it in several milder ways first.

LOL @ 'getting involved in other people's dinners' Rikers :)

Agree, the phrase sounds harsh; I wouldn't either say it to another adult, or a child, though out of context it's difficult to judge.

Like you I would have been a bit but unless there are other factors that make you think it was inappropriate I expect that it was harmless, or at worst just thoughtless. I think you handled it well with your DD though.

PFB. (sorry). Remember that, in the future, your PFB WILL get punishments at school when she has done nothing wrong. It used to bug me when it happened to my DC's but I never said anything about it. Class punishments are for lazy teachers.

OP I sympathise. My dd3 also didn't have the best time in Reception and I think young children are often spoken to in a rude manner by staff whose only impetus is to get them to conform. That's the way school is unfortunately.

I love some of the comments on this thread. They are very funny.

My dd is the 'helpful' child. She constantly gets told to mind her own business and I always back the teacher/TA up.

You are being a bit pfb really. She needs to concentrate on her own things.

I have used 'mind your own business' with DD since she was that was small because she appointed herself Chief Executive for general Problem Solving and Peer Related Issues.

I adore her. I am extremely polite and now, aged 10, she is very polite too.

But she really needed to mind her own business