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AIBU?

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Original poster

Changing nappies in church

211 replies

StormGlass · 09/09/2012 16:47

We went to a christening today.

After the service had finished, and as people were starting to leave the church (quite slowly, as the family group were loitering around the font so guests could take photos if they wanted), one woman changed her little girl's shitty nappy on the end of one of the pews.

I thought this was very bad behaviour.

Okay, shitty nappies need to be changed before too long or the kid could get nappy rash - but the service had finished. People were leaving the church. I've never been in that church before, so no idea what the toilet facilities were like, but surely the mum could have found somewhere outside the church to change the nappy, if it needed doing urgently. Like the well tended grassy verge outside the church, or their car, for instance.

I didn't mention anything, as the family group didn't seem to notice and I didn't want to spoil their day by making a fuss about it. But I'm sort of wondering if I should have said something.

AIBU to think this was unacceptable behaviour? And pretty grim.

OP posts:
SlightlySuperiorPeasant · 09/09/2012 20:04

:o raspberry Ok, sitting in my chief judge's seat here, I reckon that woman might get an eye roll rather than a thunder bolt. Just reading this thread, some people don't think that it 's blind

5madthings · 09/09/2012 20:07

if god was real i dont think he/she/it would give a shit tbh.

anyway talking of pooey nappies my dd has just come up to me and she smells rather fragrant! so i think i have a nappy to change, i shall do it in the sitting room, everyone else is in bed, so i shall stick her mat on the floor and the window is open as its so warm anyway.

SlightlySuperiorPeasant · 09/09/2012 20:08

Try again...

...some people don't think it 's blindingly obvious that a nappy shouldn't be changed in a room designed for worship where reasonably possible. If the woman did feel that the baby should/could be changed somewhere else but decided she couldn't be bothered then that's different.

SlightlySuperiorPeasant · 09/09/2012 20:11

Anyway, I suppose my point is that in the OP's scenario the important thing is not the poo-filled nappy but the attitude that goes with it. Unless poo was smeared over the pew and the nappy left on the floor, in which case the nappy and the attitude are problematic!

SarryB · 09/09/2012 20:13
Raspberryandorangesorbet · 09/09/2012 20:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Yika · 09/09/2012 20:13

I've also changed my DD's nappies in public if there isn't anywhere obvious to change her. A few times I've changed her on the floor of tiny, dirty restaurant toilets and felt bad for her. I dont think i would change her on a church pew - if I had to stay in the church, it would be on the floor - but I don't think it's a huge issue. How do you change a nappy in a pushchair? I'm impressed at those who manage this feat!

SomersetONeil · 09/09/2012 20:15

People become immune to their own baby's shit; I know as one of mine is still in nappies.

But to everyone else, it is human shit - no better nor more fragrant than their own shit.

Feel free to continue to change shitty nappies in front of complete strangers in social situations, and they will continue to deem you a teeny bit feral and lacking in basic cop-on.

Also, all this coy talk of 'poo' doesn't make it smell any better!

5madthings · 09/09/2012 20:20

yika i lay the pushchair flat and the lay baby/toddler in and do it like that, its fine :) tho you do need a pushchair that lies fairly flat.

and as for changing nappies in social situations, most of us can and do avoid it if we can, but as i said on a train what else are you meant to do? there isnt the space in the toilet on the train and they are rank, hell i dont use a train toilet if i can avoid it so i wouldnt lay may child down on the floor of one, mat or no mat and then have to kneel down to change it myself!

changing nappies anywhere someone is eating, not ok.

changing nappies out say in a park etc, go somewhere off to one side and use a mat, or do it in the pushchair. on a train i do it on a seat (with mat) or i go to the bit inbetween carriages and change them there, on a mat again obviously. if its a small baby i have just changed them lying on my knee, but mine are all tall so and i am short so not enough knee space for long!

Mintyy · 09/09/2012 20:20

Exactly, Somerset.

It is something about the "My BABY needs changing NOW and I couldn't give a STUFF for how anyone else thinks" that gets right on ma tits about this. Its got nothing to do with it being a church, from my pov, and everything to do with my firmly belief that there would have been somewhere better to change that baby.

Raspberryandorangesorbet · 09/09/2012 20:23

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Northernlurkerisbackatwork · 09/09/2012 20:24

I just do not get why there is the need for the bosom hoisting over this. It's one nappy. Where does all this knickers in a twist over 'appropraite' come in?

Raspberryandorangesorbet · 09/09/2012 20:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Northernlurkerisbackatwork · 09/09/2012 20:29
Grin
AuntLucyInPeru · 09/09/2012 20:29

Eugh! Breastfeeding - yes. Wet nappies, yes. Dirty nappies. No. God may not mind, but I wouldn't be impressed.

5madthings · 09/09/2012 20:30

but there may not have been anywhere else to change the baby.

and seriously what should you do on a train etc? when i go to london i book my tickets in advance so can only go on certain trains, its a 2hr journey, no changes so i cannot get off to find a place to change a baby/toddler so i have to do it on the train. i am not going to leave them to sit in it and at least if i change the nappy i can bag it up in a nappy sack and put it away so it then isnt stinking the train out, it would smell far more if i leave the child to sit in it and yes most likely leak.

i remember going to a restaraunt with ds1 when he was little and he had a poo whilst sat in the highchair, i lifted him out of the highchair and as i did so it started to drip down his leg (he had short dungarees on) i grabbed napkins and hurridly bundled him to the toilets and then had to call dp to bring spare clothes and help as he was at the wriggly try and crawl away stage and it was just EVERYWHERE! i would never change a nappy in an eating area and i wouldnt have done it during a service, but at the end as everyone was leaving if there was no-where else then what can you do?

and as i said the op has no idea if there where any facilitie and infact the nappy changing parents may well have asked and been told to do it there.

MrsKeithRichards · 09/09/2012 20:30

Why the fuck would you put your baby on a toilet floor??

Am I the only one that can change a baby without a special table, mat or contraption? Knees, we all have 'em!

SarryB · 09/09/2012 20:30

Also, never got those amazing people who can change a nappy on their lap. I have tried (and failed) at this. Usually results in baby rolling off. Not good.

MrsKeithRichards · 09/09/2012 20:31

It's all I've ever done!

5madthings · 09/09/2012 20:34

i could do it when mine were small but not once they got bigger, my knees simple arent big enough and in the toilets on the train there just isnt space to change a baby or not on the anglia trains i go on and they are rank at th best of times. i rarely use them, they dont even have a proper seat! and if i have had to i would hover and NOT sit on it! honestly they are revolting so i couldnt sit on the toilet and change a nappy on my lap. if it was a toilet with a lid that came down yes with a small baby, no with a rather large toddler, mine are just too big and my knees/legs too small.

Sirzy · 09/09/2012 20:34

I have knees but I also have very short legs meaning no chance of changing a nappy of a baby over about a week old on my legs!

I can change a nappy in a pram though that is easy!

SarryB · 09/09/2012 20:36

I can change a dirty nappy while the baby is still in bed without waking him.

(sorry, has this turned into a nappy-changing skills boasting thread?)

NellyBluth · 09/09/2012 20:38

It is 'just a poo' to the parents - it is not just a poo to everyone else. I can happily admire the contents of my little one's nappies (well, not 'happily', but you know what I mean) but I don't expect anyone else to be comfortable with seeing my baby's poo. I'm with others who say that it is actually rude and inconsiderate to change a poo-ey nappy in a public place. SarryB, I would have gone to the toilets. But then I know if there is a chance I will be somewhere with no changing facilities, I'll take a travel mat and a spare blanket and so I would have changed the nappy in the toilets after covering the floor.

Northernlurkerisbackatwork · 09/09/2012 20:38

I won a race at a family night at church - had to change a baby (doll) applying powder etc then put baby in a pushchair and whizz round an obstacle course. You had to do the baby change blindfold. I was brilliant! You should have seen me do the obstacle course on two wheels Grin

Sirzy · 09/09/2012 20:39

They don't need to see the poo, she wasn't waving the nappy around and forcing people to look FFS!

I do wonder if some of you have ever been in the toilets of a small old church before? There is often hardly room for one person let alone to consider trying to change a nappy in there!