To object the use of the word 'rape' in a friend's FB status?

[crazycanuck]

He used it referring to his bank account getting raped by charges from his bank. When I called him on it he said he was referring to the 2nd definition in the Oxford dictionary that defines it as to wantonly destroy. (Cue his knuckle-dragger friends coming on and cheering and back-slapping him for his cleverness). Technically he is correct I guess but I really hate the way he and his generation (he's 18 years younger than me) use that term, because I think they reckon they are being all hip and edgy by using it (he had to look it up in the dictionary to get that definition before he posted his response!) because it gets a response from what they commonly refer to as man-hating feminists. I think it's part of the problem contributing to the normalisation of rape.

Am I being oversensitive? I also hate the term 'frape', which he also uses on a regular basis.

Apologies if I seem to post and run, it being a school morning.

Defriend him. He's a jerk.

But the word rape has more than one meaning. It also means to seize or take something by force. It is just a word and i think people on mn get overly het up about its use tbh.

It's a word, a very emotive word but just a word with different meanings.

He's right.

Many words have different meanings.

That said, it's a bit insensitive to use use it.

Love the name Mrs Raj! I've become addicted to TBBT since I've been on maternity leave!

Excellent!

And isn't Raj a vision of beauty, like him better at the beginning with curly hair though.

YANBU to wonder why you are friends with this knob and his knuckle-dragging mates.

I disagree that rape "is just a word". It's common usage describes a very personal, demeaning and devastating assault. No normal person goes about saying they've been "raped by bank charges" - the purpose of bank charges is hardly to "wantonly destroy" the bank's profit base so in that context it's a complete misuse of the word.

Imagine if people started to describe themselves as being "raped" by the price of their weekly grocery shop!

Just imagine if a cabinet minister described our economy as having being "raped" by the banks, or by Europe or China. I think people would feel it was completely inappropriate language.

It is certainly not "cool or edgy" and as far as I'm concerned it's simply not possible to get "overly het up about its use".

Words evolve over time and acquie new meanings of course. I am amazed how words that represent violence (usually against women) and the sex industry porn- this and porn- that have become mainstream and are now used to describe the most trivial things.
Yanbu. You had guts to say something tho. I dunno if I would have.

... and back in the day, gay meant happy.

How would your FB prick friend like it if you went around calling him that?

Guessing the knuckle draggers might not be clapping that so loudly....

I think he's still misusing it tbh, its a big word. In the context he describes it should be talking about burning rainforests, not taking 20 quid out of his bank account. It devalues the term, which is the same issue as you initially raised. Regardless of context, rape is not a term to describe a non-devastating, everyday occurrence. (Let alone a legitimate transaction he agreed to in the T&Cs)

It's misogynistic. If he can't understand that he's not clever at all.

Defriend

I know, I said he was technically correct, but it is an emotively charged word which most people associate with one definition. Maybe I am being oversensitive, but you never really see it seriously used anymore other than in referring to someone being raped. It just seems to me like he was being deliberately provocative in using it. Kind of like those disgusting t-shirts I see linked to on here every now and then, the blatantly misogynist ones (I can't remember the website now for the life of me).

New series of TBBT in a couple weeks!

You have all put it so much more eloquently than I! Thank you. I was also thinking of it in terms of 'letter of the law' and 'spirit of the law', i.e., literal meaning versus implied meaning. I may link him to this thread if he carries on.

What about that yellow stuff that grows in fields?

He can say whatever he wishes on his fb page, but you don't have to read it, so 'hide' him.

What about that yellow stuff that grows in fields? do you mean Canola?

Saying it has more that one meaning is missing the point. It has one meaning in general use. I refuse to believe there is anyone who hears the word rape in general use and has to figure out which context it's in (excepting specific areas of work of course)

The yellow stuff in fields is rape. Never heard it called canola. Oilseed rape, referred to as rape.

I think your friend is been an idiot and now it's been pointed out to him the nice thing to do would be to change/delete it. Not try and defend himself.

I thought the yellow stuff that grows in fields are Buttercups.

YANBU,i hate seeing frape and rape being used lightheartedly and jokingly.