Does anyone else think this is weird behaviour?

[Enfyshedd]

DSS2 has made loads of friends with the other children in the street, but there's one particular boy (about 7?) whose behaviour seems really strange and possibly ASD. These are what DP & I have seen/experienced since the start of this week.

1. Monday -We were getting really to go out, so DSS2 had come in and was getting changed. Boy comes to the back door, asks DP if DSS2 is coming back out, and is told no. Boy then spots DSS2's water pistols on the kitchen counter and says "Can I play with DSS2's water pistols?".

1. Again on Monday - We'd come back and I decided to pop to the corner shop for a treat. On my way back, I was halfway through the lolly I'd bought & Boy spots me. "What have you got?" "A lolly." "Can I have some?" "No!"

1. Tuesday - DP is taking DSS2 to his mother's for contact night after school. Boy is in a different school and is walking up the hill with his DM and siblings (including one in buggy) while DP & DSS2 are walking downhill on the other side. Boy spots DSS2 , shouts his name to get his attention and immediately runs off the pavement to get to DSS2 without checking the traffic (it's a fairly busy road) while his DM tries to grab him to pull him back while still holding the buggy.

1. Tuesday again - I'm home alone & BFing DD (who was being really shouty as we'd not long got in ourselves and she was really hot) while DP is doing shopping in town after dropping off DSS2. All of a sudden, there's a loud knocking at the back door. I assume it's one of DSS2's friends (got a clear view from the sofa without lifitng my head up really high which means DD unlatches) so I ignore it as I'm dealing with DD and we're constantly telling them that DSS2 is never home on a Tuesday evening. Then there's this almighty bang - either the door was kicked or headbutted to make that noise. I lift myself up and see Boy at the door how is continuing to knock. I scream at the door that DSS2 isn't home, but Boy continues to for another couple of minutes before getting bored and leaving.

Is this normal behaviour?

Lacks boundaries? Little bit strange but firm (albeit kindly) replies may sort it.

Ah but 7 yr old girls are not usually as "pushy" or forward as boys. Boys do develop cheekyness amongst themselves and girls tend to be giggly girls together at that age. Boys do need a lot more guidence in the "right" direction regardless of SN or NT its the norm.

None of DD's 7 year old male friends behave like that either coff33pot.

I dont see the problem with asking to play with someones toys either. I have 3 old scooters here that I lend out that DD doesnt use so that DS mate could use one. They also quite often swap guns, toys etc for a few days to play with. He asked he didnt just TAKE.

Thats not normal...................god I hate that term just as much as the word wierd.

It IS normal to test boundaries, its normal to ask if they can borrow a toy, its normal for a child to be excited and want to play with the same person especially at 7yrs old and he could well be just slightly immature still. Its even "normal" for a child to have a hissy fit wether in the street or inside the home behind doors. All is normal. Just more guidence possibly needed to direct him NOT to kick doors.

DS2 has ASD and has better manners than his friends. Just the way he was brought up He's 12 though not 7. Most 7 year olds have yet to grasp social niceties (usually).

I've just posted on another thread coff33, go and read the one about teenage niece's FB and her friends. T'will give you many a LOL about the fun of having normal teens rather than our weird ones!

off to have a peek!

this thread has made me a bit

Why has it made you sad, imonthefone?

it makes me sad that out-spoken kids are viewed as strange

it makes me sad that OP assumes ASD, without having any knowledge/experience of ASD

I think you could do with educating yourself on ASD. Maybe by googling or something instead of spouting on here. Then you will see that the jump from his behaviour to ASD makes little sense.

IMHO this thread is very stereotypical, the poor child is not standing a chance here with a lot of posters. I would be more concerned if the child was not asking about using things etc, every child I know is inquisitive. Did he kick off when told no? so where is the weird behaviour?

For those of you who say my child would never do that! Maybe not when you are around but most children test their boundaries however well behaved and angelic they appear to be when the boundary setters are present.

Bringing up children is the biggest learning curve any parent encounters and there is no "science" about it at all. (I know this from bringing up 5 of my own, all adults now)

So stop sitting in judgement and diagnosing, interact with the poor child on a nice equal level, you may be amazed at the results.

Well no, the OP hasn't been very "politically" correct with the wording but blimey it's really nothing to get any knickers in a twist about is it

Well there's where I differ from you, I can see how offensive it may be to parents of children with ASD and you cant

That's where you're wrong though, my neice has been "labelled" diagnosed with ADHD and my sister runs an autistic unit. I STILL don't get hung up on polically correct shite and flounce around due to somone using the wrong terminology for things

Your niece has been diagnosed? Not your own child? And it's had such a profound effect on you that you see fit to put yourself above the specialists involved and dismiss her diagnosis in such a snarky way? Yes, you're the epitome of understanding aren't you?

But thats you clipped, you can see from this thread that some do find it offensive.

I dont think your use of the word labelling is helpful either really.

clipped that is your sister and your niece. Believe me it is VERY different when you are dealing with ASD and ADHD on a daily, 24 hour basis. No break.

clipped, if your neice had cystic fibrosis or was diabetic would she have been "labelled" ?

toughen up love- long road ahead!

when kids were younger, I put a green card in the window if kids could knock and a red card if they couldn't. All of them could understand that. I do not come from a very sociable family and found it quite hard having random small children in my life- but what you describe sounds pretty normal to me. Does DSS like him? To me, that is all that matters. I took the view that my kids having a range of friends was good- helps them deal with the wide variety of kids they have to as they get older. Also, one girl who I thought was quite hard work and a bit tough, stood up for DD2 in secondary school and sorted out a spot of bullying in a manner that no teacher or parent could. and it stayed sorted.

red and green cards are your friends!

The child's behaviour in the OP sounds within the realms of perfectly ordinary to me.

Sorry, but this thread is utterly ridiculous!

Some kids are chancers, others aren't, the kid in question is a chancer, SO WHAT?! My ds would never lick anything someone else had licked, my dd1 would quite happily chew gum from someone else's mouth, not nice, but there you go.

He asked for a lick of your lolly, you said no, what's the big deal? Posting on mn about it IS weird imo. Same goes with the toys.

Whenever a kid asks me anything like that, I just laugh and say no, more often than not, the kid laughs too because they know they're just trying their luck as much as I do. Not all kids who are a little bit cheeky and trying it on have asd, that's absurd!

My dcs often go to my dm for a few nights in the hols, their friends knock every day they're not here, they're not being rude or nasty, they're just being kids and can't remember what they were doing 5 mins ago, let alone I told them yesterday dc's aren't back for a few days!

Op are you an only child?

i use red and green cards as well thought i was the only one

I STILL don't get hung up on polically correct shite and flounce around due to somone using the wrong terminology for things

At the end of the day it's about education and there's way to do this in a kindly manner.