To be angry at this??

[Yummymummyyobe1]

So I sorted out the family wardrobes and placed the items in various carefully selected charity bags and placed them outside the front of the house. On coming back into the lounge there is a women stood in my front garden pilfering items from the bags (mainly baby clothes and bits). Anyway I go out and ask her what she on earth she thinks she is up to and to return said items as what she was doing was theft and trespass. She reluctantly handed the items back and I said I was more than happy for her to purchase the items and then money go to the charities in question.

She asked how much an item and I said 20p for the vests, 30p for the babygrows (there were some still with the labels on) and a £1 for everything else (about 60% had the labels on and cost a lot more than a £1). She walked off muttering.

WIU to refuse to let her take the items for free as they were things we no longer wanted. I felt that it was paramount to theft from the charities we had chosen not to mention from us.

I'm afraid I was being very serious captainhastings and yes perhaps it was wrong of me but OMG the cheek of some people.

If you really think she is a fantasist: then you also really think she has genuine problems, and is genuinely, really, vulnerable. So do you usually think mocking and bitching at people with such mental health problems is an amusing way to spend the evening? Or is Mumsnet just the lucky venue in which you allow this singularly lovely personality streak to roam unchecked?

If you do not think she is a fantasist: do you really think it's appropriate to snigger loftily that she is one, and has mental health problems? Seriously? Because she likes buying expensive baby clothes, and letting people know it? if so, you need to take a fucking hard look at yourself. It means you have rather worse problems than mentioning what brands of baby clothes you favour.

I often love how direct and non-fluffy MN can be. It's hilarious and honest that way. But usually, it's also compassionate and intelligent. This thread has a level of compassion and intelligence that would disgrace my toddler, and this is the second insanely nasty thread in 24 hours. Is someone handing out hallucinogenic Kool Aid or something? And no, I would no more spend that kind of cash on baby clothes than fly. I get most of my kid's stuff on Ebay, because I am cheap. I posted on another thread the exact cost of my wedding dress: fifty quid in the Monsoon sale. I think the way our society tries to tell people that they are what they buy is toxic. But that is so besides the point at this state in the game.

Would it really, really kill people sometimes to be just the least little bit kinder?

Ah 4 months is a lovely age :) Is he smiling? It does go so fast!

I suffer from the need to please too...........It leads me into working too many hours and not having enough boundaries or not being able to say no to people. Seems like we have a few things in common!

Yummy there are often nice threads on here especially people chatting who have moved to new areas. That could be an idea for a new thread?

Maybe in chat rather than aibu.

There might be some people who hs e had similar things with feeling they need all the things you think?

But the main thing is if your happy & enjoying your baby.

I imagine she was embarrassed about needing the clothes , I would not want someone in need to feel as if they need to beg me for things I has cast aside ,

I assumed the constant label dropping and use of offensive terms such as chavtastic was a poor attempt at humour .

Enfyshedd thanks for that it is funny how people change their tune when asked what is going on. We throw very little away as we have a green waste bin, food bin and various recycling boxes we probably thrown 1/4 of a bag away a week at the very most, so it only has to withstand minimual weight.

Been there with the exploding nappy. Drool ruins outfits as well. The amount of bibs I go through is ridiculous and he still ends up with yellow drool marks around the collar.

Ah now I see why you want to spend money on nice clothes!! Exploding nappies aren't fun. Especially at 3am!! I've thrown out a few vests as they are stained. I am sure neither of my sons had exploding nappies! My DD is 9 weeks and has just started to smile and it is super.

Have read your 21:26 post and am sorry, when I first started earning I high wage I often bought things to fit in and I know that people sneered at me. I am ashamed that I have now become that sneering person .

Enjoy your lovely things , I did exactly the same with my first child for similar reasons . It is good to have some play clothes though.

Captain you are being naive. There are plenty of charities that give clothes to people in need, and op was keen to help charities by donating rather than selling for personal need.

There is an off chance the person needed the clothes. She only needed say and the op would have given them.

You can't excuse all theft by saying " they might be poor"

Sorry yummy, was posting that while feeding the family and it took a while before was done - convo has calmed down and moved on by now.

Oops.

Sorry captain x post.

Sorry lots of auto correct errors . An typing on an iPad that cost me £600 using my nail extensions that cost £35.

I would rather be naive than cynical .

Captain, how do you do the whole typing with nails thing? I did just cheapy ones from boots that you stick on yourself and it was impossible to use my iphone. Or dress and undress DD.

And incidentally, if people want to give to families in genuine need, then Home Start can usually direct you well on where. My (bought 2nd hand, mostly, but still in good nick!) old toys and baby kit went to a charity that runs out of the local contact centre. Takes guesswork out of the equation as the families have been referred as in need.

perfectstorm thank you so much. I was on the wedding dress thread too and there was some real name dropping on there.

catgirl2012 he smiles, natters and giggles lots and is going through the major cuddle phase. How is your little one? It does indeed seem we are not all that disimilar when it comes to pleasing people it is a hard one to break.

Thank you again PicklesThePottyMouthedParrot by the way loving the screen name, I love being with my DS and watching him grow.

captainhastings perhaps she was in genuine need and if she was then I feel awful for refusing her a few unwanted items. However, what of she just wanted to sell them on then the charities would have lost out. Perhaps Chavtastc was cruel and I'm sorry but I do dislike Burburry.

But if the person taking the clothes was genuinely in need she has helped them. She could then take the other stuff to the charity shop and help other people .

By giving to a charity shop , the shop benefits but some of the money raised will go on running costs and wages and the person buying them may be planning to sell on eBay anyway ,

I sure that people take advantage of my nature all the time , but if every now and again I help someone genuinely in need that is fine . I would hate to think that I had turned someone away who needed help.

mckayz I type badly, hence my posts !

It's bot cynical to object to someone on your property fishing about your garden I don't think.

But you might live in a nicer place than me!

I have heard about people pinching charity stuff a lot, it's a problem.

Good idea about home start.

perfectstorm I was going to say the same thing about home start. I have also given to refuges and mother and baby units of psychiatric hospitals .

I am lucky to live somewhere nice, although that has not always been the case.

I grew up with very little and had to rely in the kindness of others . I therefore have a lot to give back .

GragPop hear you on the droll.

Baby smiles are yummy McKayz

Thanks captainhastings I couldn't type with nails.

perfectstorm I will look into that thank you.

Lots of us grew up with very little Captain , and lots of our children are doing so as well.

It however absolutely does not make it ok to go into a complete stranger's garden and take their stuff without asking.

Even if you're genuinely in need stealing from charity bags is wrong. How poor do you have to be for stealing from charities to be ok? I know plenty of people who live day to day and wouldn't dream of stealing from others.