BBC interview with the mother who lost her son in Burnham at the weekend

[davinci]

I can't believe that they interviewed her, she is clearly in a state of shock and should be left to mourn. The voyeuristic nature of the interviewer whose only goal appears to be to upset her even more for the benefit of his viewers made me ashamed to be watching. I can't see any justification for this type of interview

Maybe they were strapped in the pushchair and maybe the grandma was there, they were visiting her

Missymoo That is awful. Some people are beyond sick. My friends mum lost her DS2 to SIDS, her DS1 was about 4 or 5 at the time (he'd started school) and she found out that the other mums at school had been speculating and gossiping, saying that the DS1 had tried to feed the baby biscuits and he had choked to death - She found out because one of the womens DCs overheard and he was bullied at school for years for it. Awful, vile people.

oopsi I am disgusted. Yes, she could have held his hand. Doesn't mean it wouldn't have happened. My daughter holds my hand everywhere. When she is messing around though I sometimes lose grip and she goes flat on her face. It would only take it to happen in the wrong spot.

How would you feel if you were holding you childs hand, lost grip and in that split second something terrible happened, and we all sat here going "Well, we're ignoring the elephant in the room, she clearly wasn't holding him tight enough/used reins/carried him"?

intrigued by firemansamisnormansdad

When my sister died very suddenly I wanted the world to stop, to feel the pain, to understand the whole works just changed for the worse because she was no longer in it - I suspect this poor woman feels the same & in that context, it seems reasonable to speak to people/ media about her tragedy.
It's a common feeling I think, when genuinely grieving & in shock, think of that poem 'stop the clocks'

"am also wondering something else.the parents both say they instantly jumped in the water to try and save him, so who was minding his 2 sisters who was looking after the 2 younger children."

"Not slating them necessarily-just wondering whether they were left unattended."

"but the other 2 could have jumped in too!" - You probably don't realise that most people in the world are decent and I am sure someone was looking after the children and getting them away from the situation so they didn't see their brother die.

Oopsi what has happened to you in your life to make you come across as a total bitch. I haven't put a ? as I don't actually want to know but you are being totally disgusting with your comments on here. These poor parents have to live forever knowing they couldn't rescue their son, their other children will be asking what happened to Dylan, the whole world know they are the couple whose son drowned. And you are getting some kind of thrill from posting disgusting comments even when you have been asked to stop. It isn't a memorial thread no, but it isn't a debate either what you are having.

I heard an interview with her on the radio and wondered why she sounded so defensive. Now I know :( And yes, it could happen to anyone :(

I think there is some public interest in reflecting on hidden dangers by the sea and how we may keep our dcs safe. There is no possible interest or defence for wondering why both parents tried to save their child from the sea.
Just stop now Oopsi please.

oopsi, in the circumstances do you really think that they were acting on anything other than instinct?

Just seen Dylan's body has been bought back to his parents RIP Dylan

At least they can have a resting place for him now. Poor family. What a dreadful tragedy.

I'm so glad, but so sad. So so sad.

glad they have found his body, now his parents can lay him to rest :(

RIP Dylan xxx

Me and my lovely mum had a ''discussion'' about this tragic case the other day, I have a almost 5 year old and an 18 month old and I am a fairly relaxed parent, anyway my mum was saying why didnt they take more care I never let u out of my sight etc etc and I reminded her of a time when my brother was 2 and she lost him on the beach for 25 minutes, anything could have happened to him and if it had then imagine what people would have said. She then agreed I had a point. The scary thing is I probably wouldnt have held my sons hand constantly on the jetty maybe now I will think twice but these poor parents have a lifetime of torment and loss ahead of them they need endless sympathy not condemnation.

we lost ds4 last summer for about 40 mins! i thought he was with dp, dp thought he was with me, we were in a forest! it was fine he had found some play equipment and was happy as larry. these things happen to the best parents, we are all only human.

i have a Dylan, and he and my other 4 will be getting extra cuddles at bedtime tonight.

Exactly.
You are probably like me everlong
Ultra aware of all the things that could go wrong.
Because the most awful things have gone wrong for us and people we know.
A bit on he hyper vigilant side.

But as you said, it takes a second.

Anyone who thinks otherwise has never met a 2 year old or is being deliberately provocative. I cant imagine why they would feel the need.

this bit of what oopsi has been saying, I 100% agree with
i think the point this thread has proved that most people do not give water and in particular the sea, the respect it deserves I am not defending him/her and do think that oopsi should stop going on and on now, BUT

we live near the sea - there is a coastal road right next to the beach that is closed in bad weather, for a really good reason, it is dangerous - yet you still get people walking along there (youths mainly, but people of all ages and backgrounds), to watch the storm, dodge the spray, play chicken, hoping to get some good video footage etc - it is really dangerous, all it takes is a sudden bigger wave and they are gone - tragic but avoidable

there is another area where "tombstoning" is still happening despite fatalities, publicity and warning signs. and another area very close by where gravel quarries with steep sides and ice cold water again claim lives every year.

and yet another local beach, very sandy, shallow, calm water, but dozens and dozens of emergency coastguard rescues each year of kids being blown away on inflatables because people dont think anything bad can happen in such a nice place when they are on holiday - they think it will never happen despite the warning signs and the publicity

I have nothing but sympathy for Dylans poor poor family. I can only hope someone somewhere might change their view of the sea to make sure this or something like it does not happen to them

Thank god they have his body back, not having him back would have been uterly unbearable for them not to be able to have a proper funeral. My heart aches for them.

I am glad Dylan has been found but it's so sad to think of the family having to bury their little boy

RIP Dylan

Oopsi who has clearly got a huge kick out of being cruel and provocative.I can only imagine she is one of those ghoulish creeps on RIP sites, goading and blaming and sticking the boot into already irrecoverable wounds.

I'm not a fan or member of Facebook and I don't really know about memorial sites but I know what it's like to be a mother and to love her children...and the vulnerability and fallibility that comes with that. And my heart fucking bleeds for these parents.

I am relieved that his poor body has been found; but still heartbroken for the family.
And firmly resolved to continue to be as neurotic as I like around water with DS.

Water really worries me.

We lose so many toddlers every year here and tourists to the rips. Last year I think it was two strapping young lifeguards who were swept under. Doesn't matter how close, doesn't matter how strong you are, or what is happening, water is dangerous.

Poor baby.

It seems that perhaps people who live near the sea have a better appreciation of how dangerous the sea can be compared to others.
So what do you do when you see a parent allowing a child to do something very dangerous (and I am talking about any kind of danger, not particularly water). Do you get involved and try and tell them (risking embarassing them or getting a mouthful of abuse) or do you mind your own business (their child, their decision).It's a situation I've been in before and wonder what the consensus is.

and of course RIP little man xx

I don't know catwoo :( I live by the sea and have seen parents being scarily laid back with their children (small children - some babies in nappies - being allowed to play in the water while their parents are at least 50m away) but I don't say anything because I'm sure I would just get called a busybody. I do watch any children at risk like a hawk though because if their parents don't realise the danger they're in, I do and I couldn't bear to have a child's drowning on my conscience like that.