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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to be annoyed at the snarly/growly woman?

185 replies

mumnosGOLDisbest · 11/08/2012 22:04

Standing in a busy queue with dd 4yrs (who is small/average) she accidently stepped on the lady' toe. I saw so i immediately said "sorry" and said to dd she should be careful and stand still. The woman turned and looked at dd then growled said in a nice voice "ouch that was my toe". Shw paid for her things then made a point of limping away. Now if that qas you and you already had a broken toe/foot/poorly foot then i'm sorry but it wwas truly just an accident otherwise aibu to think that was a massive overreaction and the woman was a complete cow a bit harsh and really upset my dd?

OP posts:
ilovesooty · 12/08/2012 00:17

What a fuss about very little at all. Your daughter stepped on the woman's toe, and by the sound of all this it sounds as though she and you were the ones who overreacted, not the woman who was trodden on.

WorraLiberty · 12/08/2012 00:23

Her body language told your child off?

Really??

Fucking hell I must be doing it all wrong when I'm using old fashioned things like...words to tell my kids off.

LemarchandsBox · 12/08/2012 00:26

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mumnosGOLDisbest · 12/08/2012 00:26

outraged she wasnt in her house or playing with her stuff, nor was she 'fannying about'. It was a squashed, tight queue and an accident. The woman in pain or not was very aggressive to my dd and only i have the right to tell her off. If she was that hurt or annoyed she should have brought it to my attention (not turned on dd) and allowed me to deal with it. I honestly think/ know from experience that if a child/person hurt me by accident i would give a chance for a response and accept an apology (even on a childs behalf and even if inwardly thinking little bugger that hurt). Accidents happen, sometimes much worse and through less careful behaviour but its sad that so much rage is directed at a child.

OP posts:
LemarchandsBox · 12/08/2012 00:27

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thepeoplesprincess · 12/08/2012 00:35

So much rage?!

Oh give over. She didn't roundhouse kick her to the face. You just sound silly now.

mumnosGOLDisbest · 12/08/2012 00:35

worra you never met my mum! One of 'her looks' and no words were needed, hans on hips and you knew you were in for it!

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Salmotrutta · 12/08/2012 00:40

It wasnt her place to tell my child off or upset her. - it most certainly was if your DD gallumphed around, trod on her foot and then didn't even apologise. Hmm

It wasn't your place to apologise for your child - you should have made your child apologise. You clearly backed your DD up despite the fact she did actually physically impinge on someone else. It doesn't really matter if the woman was in pain or not. Your DD was in the wrong
And you didn't make her apologise.

You sound like a precious parent who will defend you child no matter what she does.

I hope she doesn't turn up in one of my classes in future years when she is a teen. Parentys who defend their child at all costs end up with real problems. Fact.
I expect you will be one of those parents who backs up their child no matter what:

"But we weren't taught that stuff" - you were (see evidence in every other pupil's notes)

"She picks on me for nothing" - no, your child is disruptive, see the recorded referrals.

"Mrs Trutta isn't Mrs X - I like Mrs X better" - that's as maybe but Mrs X has left. Deal with it. Move on.

I have had the pleasure of dealing with several parents like you (at Secondary) whose teens can do no wrong. They rarely attain much because they think their parents will always be there to get them out of trouble.
I dare say they never had to apologise when they were young either.

Salmotrutta · 12/08/2012 00:42

Not Parentys obviously - parents

ilovesooty · 12/08/2012 00:46

I have had the pleasure of dealing with several parents like you (at Secondary) whose teens can do no wrong. They rarely attain much because they think their parents will always be there to get them out of trouble

Me too. When Little Precious goes to school the OP is all set to be one of Those Parents

so much rage ? How silly.

mumnosGOLDisbest · 12/08/2012 00:50

salmo you give the rest of US teachers a bad name. Glad dd isnt your pupil as thats a lot if judgements about someone youve never met. My dd is not pampered and is taught manners. She was told to be careful but is 4/not one of your secondary pupils. When she is naughty I tell her off and had the woman not got 'in her face' i would have ensured she apologised. However as the woman assumed she was an unruly brat and told her off (sorry if the words dont quite paint that picture) she wasnt in a state to apologise so i took responsibility as her mum.

OP posts:
Salmotrutta · 12/08/2012 00:51

Lovin' the "so much rage" - which was apparently conveyed by body language Hmm

I think I'd have been quite enraged by someone's errant child standing on my foot actually.

... call me old fashioned.

LemarchandsBox · 12/08/2012 00:52

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

mumnosGOLDisbest · 12/08/2012 00:52

Oh and dd is at school and a much loved pupil by her teacher and my other colleagues thanks. Very judgy in here tonight!

OP posts:
LemarchandsBox · 12/08/2012 00:54

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ilovesooty · 12/08/2012 00:54

Oh dear. This is going to be the nasty woman being horrible to your precious child no matter what, isn't it?

mumnosGOLDisbest · 12/08/2012 00:55

Im all for consequences of actions but she wasnt 'errant' it could have easily been the woman stepping on dd as we were all squashed but she did overreact and was very angry

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Salmotrutta · 12/08/2012 00:55

Actuallly I'm a good teacher OP.

How did the woman get in her face?
That means she must have bent down and spoken forcibly within inches of your child's face.

Did she?

ilovesooty · 12/08/2012 00:56

a much loved pupil by her teacher and my other colleagues thanks

I bet if you work at the same place as she's educated they wouldn't dare criticise her anyway.

Salmotrutta · 12/08/2012 00:56

Thank you LeMarchand - apparently the OP didn't quite see my point.

mumnosGOLDisbest · 12/08/2012 00:57

Yes if you remove the 'precious'. If youve read the whole thing i said earlier i came here to let off steam not have mt mund changed. She was nasty and being horrible!

OP posts:
mumnosGOLDisbest · 12/08/2012 00:58

*My mind

OP posts:
Salmotrutta · 12/08/2012 00:58

She wasn't "errant" - but she stood on someone's foot!

Salmotrutta · 12/08/2012 01:00

This is AIBU - you ask an opinion and you get it.

You should have posted in the fluffy bunny topic if you wanted agreement.

ilovesooty · 12/08/2012 01:01

I still think that someone who's still ranting about this hours later and refusing to see anyone else's point of view lacks any sense of proportion.

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