To hope that my neighbour (or his wife) reads this?

[politebutgrumpy]

Hello Mr N and Mrs N

Indeed, hello anyone else who reads this and it reminds them of their own behaviour.

Please STOP FUCKING ENTERING MY FRONT AND BACK GARDENS WITHOUT MY FUCKING PERMISSION.

The first time, with your kids frisbee, I ignored it. Because hey kids throw frisbees.

The next time, when you REPAINTED THE SLABS ON THE PAVING STONES THAT ARE ON MY LAND I ignored it, because I was jet lagged and ill and DP was away and I couldn't handle a row by myself. And then it seemed to late and petty.

But when you PRUNED MY FUCKING PLANTS BACK and we texted you to say no we meant no. Prune from your side all you want but not ours. We like them a bit secret gardeny. Because its how we want it and we own them and the land and it gives us privacy from you.

Don't enter again. When you came in after your washing up gloves fell into our garden and I again asked you to stop I wasn't looking for an apology or an excuse I was looking for absolute confirmation that it would stop.

What you are doing is TRESPASS. It is also FUCKING CREEPY and breaks every social norm people on this cramped little island have.

I am going to get a monitor now so I can spy you entering. I can and I will take legal action. Also, the walls are very thin between my study and your kitchen, so I may consider playing inappropriate music, violent films, pornography etc on loudspeaker at certain times of the day. See how you like your space invaded.

Yours sincerely

PBG

We had neighbours like that. The day before we moved in, they cut all their bushes and hedges and chucked them into our garden, then over the years they started being really creepy and coming into our front garden to cut our plants down because they 'didn't like the look of them', then they started leaning over the back garden to cut yet more bushes on our side. They finally moved away about two years ago, because the road was 'getting rough'.... Mrs N used to constantly ask me when we were going to gravel over our lovely front garden and make a car port and other 'please make your house a clone of our freaky ocd house' questions. odd bods for sure.

Cultivate a large patch of nettles in the spot where they climb down.

There's some fucking weird people about!

How about blasting them with the hose when they come in. People always recommend it when cats come into your garden uninvited....

Or perhaps you could secretly dig out your garden so when they come vaulting over they suddenly drop 20 feet....

Sorry to make fun. Honestly it would piss me right off too. Are there neighbours on the other side? Do they have similar problems or is it just your garden they invade? Perhaps you could all get together - strength in numbers and all that.....

What about something so that they can't position their ladder?

If this were me I would make a antisocial nusince diary and install security cameras and then go to the police with the evidence of trespass and get an injunction against these awful people.

With the plants their excuse was that they thought the plants were overgrown and it would look neater trimmed from our side than theirs (when I said you had every legal right to do from yours). They did say they were only trying to help. They have a reason for everything you respond and it wears me down.

Yes, they painted paving slabs to match. That was front garden, where blocking up access is much harder for reasons too boring to explain.

They are 40s I would guess. Two kids, one either teen or pre teen, one I think late teens. About 15 years older than us. Not that it matters.

How about asking your local police to have a word. That's a bit less official than a solicitors letter, but more formal than just you having a word.

This would drive me nuts too - can't believe people on this thread are criticising you because you object to someone altering your property and scaling a 6 foot fence in order to do so I'd set fire to their ladder.

if you're thinking about the negative impact of a neighbours dispute when you come to sell - then a one-off solicitor's letter is more advisable than the police.

Pixie, I've thought of that. I am researching sprinklers which sense when someone is inside. I;d get wet too but I don't care!

this would piss me off hugely.

Trellis on top of the fence.

@shorternamechange - I think a) people think I'm bonkers because of the OP and b) think about it in terms of a one-off - and have maybe popped in themselves as a one off. I sucked it up for the fucking frisbee!

Nancy - do you think so?

Narked - already roses!

Legally, a neighbour is entitled to trim back any plants which encroach on their boundary. The must NOT trim the top at all, and may only go back to the boundary. They must offer to give you back the trimmings. [long experience of wankerish neighbours]
As for entering your garden by a ladder??!! WTF? Next time they lower a ladder into your property, pick it up and move it! Cheeky bastards! (When they ask for it back, you have to give it.)
I would be planting Pyracantha under their kitchen window. That will stop them! It has two inch thorns, which make you burn when you get scratched!

So do they live next door? Or is it flats? It sounds like they painted the slabs in your front garden rather then a shared access one is that right?

Anti vandal paint

I am genuinely amazed anyone thinks this is remotely acceptable.

You can borrow my dog if you like. Am sure the size of her would deter them, and if not, her annoyance at having 'her' space invaded would!

YANBU... in fact YANBU

Have had similar problems with my neighbours, or rather the male parties of my neighbours.

From finding photos of my garden on their FB (that they had to have been in my garden to take) to one of them emptying all his baby fish in my wild life pond. 'Borrowing' my Burner... and burning it's base out to mowing my lawn without enquiring if it is what I wanted.. Dragging their garden crap through my flower beds to taking the water butt and attaching it to their shed gutter so I have a constant top of water, them making it nigh on impossible to access.

Little garden mines with smart water in them... plant VERY spiky plants..

Ooh sprinklers! Ooh burning plant!

What about a trip wire that remotely activates a loudspeaker saying "GET OUT OF MY GARDEN"?

That and a crocodile pit.

I would have repainted the slabs to hideously clash with theirs.

Saggy - great advice esp the Pyracantha, thanks!

PooPoo - they live next door. Our street is townhouses, and ours is a converted lowerground flat. They have the lowerground (I assume, maybe they just trespass there as well) and the raised ground, which is where the kitchen is.

Front garden is not shared access, no. It is not really a garden not green or anything just slabs and pot plants leading to entrance and it is very definately - according to the deeds and what you could judge with your eyes, our space. There is a low wall between ours and theirs. It is so obviously ours even my upstairs neighbours (if they tried) couldn't claim it, because the stairs to the raised ground go in a different direction!

Sorry if this isn't clear, explaining layout not my strong point!

Yes to anti vandal paint on top of the wall (assuming it's your wall, not theirs). That stuff is awesome. Once lived in a student house where we smeared it all over the windowframes, drainpipes and fences at the back after getting fed up with being burgled on a twomonthly basis. Next time they tried we could trace their path from the drain pipe to the window to the back door by the sticky hand-foot-and-bodyprints. They did not get in and even the police forensics officer had a giggle at how they must've looked by the time they gave up.