To be irritated that my friend is selling clothes I gave to her on ebay?

[girlafraid]

She has a DS 6 months younger than mine. I pass on DSs clothes which are in good nick. I'm pretty good at getting stuff in the sales so it's mostly Boden, Scandi stuff, John Lewis.... nice things.

Her DS wears the stuff and I'm glad it gets used.... but I've just noticed that she's selling the stuff her DS has grown out of on ebay. She did ask me a while ago what I wanted her to do with the stuff when finished with and I asked her to take it to the charity shop.

AIBU to be a bit pissed off about this?

What if she had used the money to buy more baby stuff. With a gift you freely give with no strings. Why did the op not volunteer te info the friend had to ask. If it was that important should have said from the outset and not wait to be asked

I've car booted loads of stuff that I've been given over the years

usualsuspect it's Polarn O Pyret, Katvig etc - Scandinavian brands. Great clothing, cool prints, excellent quality but pricey = good ebay resale value. I've got stuff that's been through at least 3 kids and still looks fantastic.

Never heard of it [pleb]

YABtotallyU

they were a GIVEN not lent, she can do what she wants with them, you do not put conditions on things you GIVE away, if you do you were disingenuous in saying that you were GIVING then in the first place!

In my local charity shop all kids stuff goes in a bin marked kids clothes 50p an item. Now for good quality stuff I would rather a friend ebayed them and made a few quid (you can make some good money on some labels - boden stuff can get £8 an item or so) than some savvy charity shop scout (a lot of those about here) bought them and did the same.

YABU People sometimes used to give me clothes for ds1 that I didn't actually want or like, but didn't want to say that to them. I used to send them to the clothing bank. Perhaps your friend doesn't want/need them and she's just using her initiative by ebaying them. Presumably, if you've given them to her, then they're hers to do with what she wants

Also worth remembering that this your friend that you are badmouthing on the internet. Nice

OP, silverdollarqueen, whether or not yes is the friend in RL raises an interesting question.

Are you sure its your stuff that is being sold?

*she, doh

Again, if you say 'give them to the charity shop' why is that ambiguous or hard to understand? I really don't get it. To me it clearly means 'give them to the charity shop' aka give them to a worthy cause not sell them and keep the money

Is this the 'new english' or something?

OP How do you know your friend is selling the clothes? Surely you don't stalk her Ebay account because that really would be very weird ow

weird *now

Is she hard up?

I'm selling some things on ebay and it's actually quite time-consuming for not a great return; but (quite frankly) we could do with the money.

Hex,that's what I thought which made me ask if there was a friend stirring?

I can't believe how many of you don't think it's a bit out of order that she is making money from the OP's generosity. She has already had wear out of them so saved money she would have had to spend on other clothes and now she is getting a second bite of the cherry. The OP has had nothing back at all for the clothes. If the friend was a nice person she should give the OP half the profits. That way everybody wins and the OP could give the money to charity if she wanted.

you gave them to her, so they are hers. she does what she likes with them.
but don't give her any more, unless you want to support her little business. imagine if all her friends are passing on things she then sells...she won't need to work...

I think the actual net profits from selling clothes on ebay is very little, and if I gave someone clothes and they were prepared to do all the listing, posting and packing work, then I'd think 15% was a good whack. A few pounds a week, really.

If someone gives something to me it's mine.

It's alittle bit cheeky i suppose.But really 3rd hand baby clothes? she'll be lucky if she can give them away!

My word, no wonder it's difficult to make a decent friend these days - trivial wingeing and moaning over 3rd hand baby clothes that you didn't want ????

You gave them away. End of. They are now not yours to comment over especially as you made it apparent you didn't want them back.

Good luck to your friend. I don't think she deserves bad mouthing on a public forum. She asked you if you wanted the clothes back. You didn't. You now have no right to comment or complain.

I think it's completely unreasonable personally.

You can't give someone something then dictate what they do with it. That's not giving.

If you were just lending them you should have been clear. "Here, have these old baby clothes but can you return them to me when you're done with them because I want to give them to charity."

Once you give someone something it becomes theirs not yours. If you don't want that to be the case don't give things away.

You're not some great and generous provider, clothing the poor and needy. You gave your mate some old baby clothes

My DM volunteers is a charity shop and quite often she is told to just bag up all the baby and children's stuff that come in for the rag man, who just pays a small amount for bundles by weight. It makes her really cross! I now pass my stuff on or give to a specialist charity shop for children's stuff. I plan to give a huge amount to a women's refuge when I move. So, the clothes on EBay may end up getting used by someone who needs them, whereas the charity shop may sell them for rags

Ah but they weren't just baby clothes they were Scandi and John Lewis Baby clothes