To think that having a baby shouldn't mean getting rid of your cat?

[GothAnneGeddes]

We're currently looking for a cat. While looking, I noticed that for the vast number of cats being rehomed, the reason given is because the owner is having a baby.

Surely it's not that hard to look after a cat and baby simultaneously? I imagine that toddlers/older children are far harder and you don't see anyone trying to rehome them?

Slightly less sarcastically, is it some sort of myth that cats and babies don't mix, or AIBU?

alistron thankfully I'm allergic to hamsters so ds will never know the horrors of a savaging by any small fury :)

YANBU would not dream of getting rid of my cat, she is part of the family and it is very touching to see DS with her. If ever DS gets upset the cat instantly rushes into room & DS calms down. During the weeks of night time feeds after DS was born, the cat was my constant companion.

I'm fostering a cat at the moment after an emergency appeal was put out for her by the overcrowded shelter. Her owner dumped her after she had a baby, the poor thing is 16 years old and came to me so stressed out that she had colitis for the first few days. Even now she panics when I'm not nearby, she yowls all night looking for someone to spend time with her (I'm in bed but the upstairs section of the house belongs to the other cat, they don't wander into each other's territories). Two friends of mine have agreed to adopt her but they're kind of special people, normally a cat that old wouldn't have a snowball's chance in hell of getting a new home.

In a nutshell, I think getting rid of the cat should be the absolute last resort. People have been rearing babies and animals together since the stone age.

"YABU. Cats are too unpredictable."

By that logic an older sibling should also be re-homed. FAR more unpredictable than a cat. My 18mo threw a remote control at my newborn's head. He also pulled him out of his bouncer onto a tiled floor.

Statistically I bet this would also mean getting rid of fathers too.

Personally I think that anyone who ins't responsible enough to continue to care for their pets should really think twice about having children. I re-homed a go who was given up because the family he came from had another baby who turned out to be terribly allergic to him. That I can understand, but just ditching a pet because you can't be bothered dealing with it!? That's just wrong.

I pushed my next younger sister into her playpen backwards, using her chin as a handy lever. I also covered her with coal from the coal scuttle (not from the fire thank god) as she lay sleeping in her pram, wrapped in her nice white blanket...

Sadly, the stats about stepfathers/mother's boyfriend and babies/toddlers not related to them biologically are really awful, far worse than animals.

I can see why people wouldnt want a cat and baby but I think the thing to do is not get a cat when you know you might have kids one day. Wait to get a cat when your kids are older.

Math - Very sadly true .

Novack - The sort of society which disposes of pets once they are "of no further use" is probably not going to be any more disposed to caring for people in need. Also, USian opposition stances to Universal Health Care has less to do with money then an widespread aversion to paying tax/anything deemed as "socialism".

YANBU... I, DH and all my sisters were raised in a 1 (in Dsis2s case, 2) cat household. You might think of getting rid if the cat was unable to toilet train but otherwise I don't see the problem.

Cats don't generally attack children (very young ones anyway) in my experience. They fuck off out of there if they are bothered.

math - it is sad, but kind of understandable. The fury my own darling children manage to provoke in me sometimes is not inconsiderable (I'm not proud of this fact). If you don't have the biological connection to hold you back you are reliant on your love/respect for your partner, and that can be a fickle thing.

The relationship that you have with a pet is very different than with a farm animal. Pets generally live in our homes and we adopt them for pleasure and companionship, with the expectation for a life long relationship. Farm animals are more likely kept in large groups, assigned numbers not names and are purchased for profit, with the expectation of sale within a relatively small number of years. Apart from in a smallholder set up the relationship is completely different.

I spent some time in China as a TEFL teacher, and my students found the idea of keeping pets slightly repugnant and very odd indeed. They had no qualms about eating cats or dogs, as to them they were just another food source. I didn't have a problem with that (and probably ate some too) but I wouldn't dream of eating my dog or cat as it would seem almost cannibalistic.

The idea of buying something to love and that loves you just to discard it when you get bored or it gets a bit difficult (not talking about people who re-home directly to new loving homes here) is to e deeply selfish. People who feel that way just shouldn't have pets.

To be honest,ni think many cats would be much happier to be thoughtfully rehomed then stay in a completely changed and disrupted household! Certainly one of mine seriously considered rehoming himself when ds was small- fortunately he just took himself off to our neighbours for most of the time.

We had 2 cats before I was pregnant and they were ok until I was gettig larger and they just started pooing and weeing everywhere. Twice my hospital bag got weed in :( It's like they knew they were being ousted from the house. It got worse when DS1 arrived, most mornings there was a shit in the kitchen sink. :( When DS1 was 3 months we'd all had enough of the misery and had to rehome them.

I had 3 indoor cats when DD1 was born and did get a few comments if getting tic of my cats, apparently cats smell milk and smother babies! I did a bit of research and there's no known case of a cat killing a baby although everyone knows that this nearly happened to their Aunties, cousins brothers wife!

My cats generally ignored the baby, as long ad you provide a get away for the cats when you have toddlers it's fine. Now we only have one cat but four children, the cat loves the older ones who fuss him but hates 2 yo DS.

Maybe I should have gotten rid of DD1 who when DD2 was a baby threw a full beaker of juice at her head whilst she was in a travel cot.

'Imemine DOGS are toatally diffrent from cats

I am in my 30s and i never hard of one case in the news in mainland britan of killing a baby,child or adult'

Yes but the 'family dog' I mentioned badly bit a little girl's nose . Some dogs/cats whatever do turn. And completely unprovoked in this case.

My mum has a lovely Burmese boy cat called Nelson, who lived with a chap in London as a house cat for years, then he got married and his wife got pregnant and wanted rid of him. Poor Nelly, she must have shooed him with a sweeping brush or mop as he is petrified of both. He now has a lufferly home in the country and a big garden to play in with my cat batty mother, so he was a lucky boy.
We found him via the Burmese cat club rehoming page, but the bloke put him in his Polish handyman's van, who met us halfway from London on the M4 services. Bizarre behaviour. People are so shallow sometimes.

I can see there being a case for some cats - my friend had a cat that was incredibly unpredictable, sometimes she would lie and be petted, but other times if you got too close she would pounce all teeth and claws. You wouldn't want her around your baby. (the cat that it, not my friend)

But in the vast majority of cases YADNBU

Yanbu. I have two cats, one of whom is a house cat. Despite all the scare mongering, we kept them and they were never a threat to ds. I didn't let the cats in the bedroom or with baby unattended.

I was brought up with pets from birth, I always enjoyed having them.

My Dsis had a cat well established in the home before the baby arrived. She made sure she knew where the cat was when putting the baby to bed. But one day she found it sitting right on top of her DD in the cot.

She was more vigilant after this!

lol @ Bubbalov about rehoming siblings. Too true.

My dp has a scarred face because he was bitten as a toddler by his family dog. Yes, it was his fault for hassling it, and his mum's for not being vigilant- but whiever's fault it was, he is still scarred, 45 years later.

I know someone who abandoned her cats as she got a new bf who preferred dogs.

Our cat has never bothered either of our DDs: they enter a room; he walks out. But he likes them in his own little way. Even 19mo DD2 is learning how to be gentle to animals.

So many people told us we'd have to get rid of our cat when I was pregnant with DD1. We found this very upsetting indeed: he's our first-born, after all....

YABU. Cats are happy to be rehomed and are not very loyal. When my sisters cat died she found out that there were about 4 or 5 other families mourning their beloved pet. The rascal.

If people think that they cannot cope with a pet and baby it is better for the pet to be rehomed. It would be far worse if you ended up stressed and an inadequate parent/pet owner.

Seeker - DS2 has a scarred face from being attacked by DS1. I reiterate my earlier point.

I don't see the reason for rehoming before the baby comes, but at the same time I think some people let the balance tip the other way and don't rehome, despite the baby being (eg) massively allergic to the cat or the cat being stressed out and miserable by the baby (or more often, the toddler). I have 2 cats. I know they would not give a damn if I rehomed them so long as they were together and the new owners were nice to them. Unfortunately they are far too anti-social (yowly, sofa scratchy) for that ever to happen