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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

mil calling dd a little madam

123 replies

Becky2011 · 07/07/2012 14:13

It's making me cross, dd is 7 mo & when we all last visited I put dd on the floor to play & she rolled over, so mil called her a little madam Hmm

Last weekend dh took dd for a visit without me & when he got back was calling dd a little madam so I know she's been doing it again & it's rubbing off on dh!

I don't like her being labelled this way in a negative fashion as worried it will stick as she gets older. They have already done this with an older gc.

Do I say / do omething or aibu?!

OP posts:
DefiniteMaybe · 07/07/2012 14:14

YABU its just something people say.

WorraLiberty · 07/07/2012 14:15

Oh ffs chill out

There's being unreasonable and there's being totally, raving bonkers unreasonable.

I'm afraid you fall well into the latter for me Grin

lovebunny · 07/07/2012 14:15

tell them. my fil used to call dd 'a little vandal'. she wasn't at all. she was adorable, small, not at all destructive. he was a twat. he needed telling. he was told. no need to be angry, just tell them that negative terms are not acceptable.

MammaTJ · 07/07/2012 14:15

I think compared to the other MIL threads I have read on here, that is very mild. In fact, it is a non issue. YABU!

LeeCoakley · 07/07/2012 14:16

Sorry, I don't understand! What's the problem? I think my brain is fuddled after the mother-is-pregnant-by-Luke-or-John thread....

Pandemoniaa · 07/07/2012 14:17

Lawks! She's 7 months old and you are getting wound up by this particular figure of speech? I think, on the whole, that this is not something worth wasting useful anger on.

lovebunny · 07/07/2012 14:17

a 'little madam' is a small girl with too great a sense of her own importance - 'entitled' is what we say nowadays. a 7mo can't be a 'little madam', she's too small. if she's focused on herself and survival, she's doing the right thing.

Catsmamma · 07/07/2012 14:17

well stop being so precious and ask her to stop, but really!

LeeCoakley · 07/07/2012 14:17

But why is it negative?

Mrsjay · 07/07/2012 14:18

you are a loon Grin It is something people say calm down a madame seriously

haththefecklessbreeder · 07/07/2012 14:20

YABU

My favourite uncle used to tell me that when I was a baby I was a right wee bugger.

I'd give my right arm to hear him say it again.

I pity your MIL. Obviously she won't be able to do anything right.

MsOnatopp · 07/07/2012 14:21

This was my nickname all the way through my childhood :(

I try to laugh it off but it was meant as a negative because I liked to do things my own way.

I would never call another girl it now. If you don't like it say so and put your foot down.

YANBU

Mrbojangles1 · 07/07/2012 14:21

Yabu and are the one who is being a madam

thebody · 07/07/2012 14:22

Get a grip.

annoyedaboutcake · 07/07/2012 14:22

I don't like it - it suggests being stroppy, rude, answering back. I think "little vandal" is quite funny though Grin but you're being a bit UR about it. x

MsOnatopp · 07/07/2012 14:22

LeeCoakley because it is usually about a child that is independant minded and said negatively.

When you are called it you feel it as a rejection of your personality

MsOnatopp · 07/07/2012 14:23

It is being precious if it is said as a one off or even a two off as a joke. It is not nice when the label sticks.

Original poster
Becky2011 · 07/07/2012 14:23

Ok I will calm down. no she does not compare to most mil threads, I am lucky!

OP posts:
Cheriefroufrou · 07/07/2012 14:23

meh! pick your battles

jamdonut · 07/07/2012 14:24

little madam - politer than "spoilt brat"

For a 7month old though that is surely just being said in fun. I've said it about my own daughter when she was tiny,and I think both my mum and MIL have used that expression. Can't see what the fuss is about.

YouOldSlag · 07/07/2012 14:24

Choose your battles. This is not one one of them. You've got years ahead of you to pick fault with your MIL. "Little Madam" sounds affectionate like "little tike" or "Little Scamp"

Hardly a negative affirmation. Truly, save your breath till something big comes along.

YABU.

Pandemoniaa · 07/07/2012 14:25

When you are called it you feel it as a rejection of your personality

Really? In all cases? Only I recall this expression being used about me as a child (by an aunt who I wasn't overly fond of) and I didn't take it at all seriously!

Original poster
Becky2011 · 07/07/2012 14:26

Posted too soon - if it seems to be sticking long term, I may say to dd after she's been called alm. 'no you're not dd, are you, you're a good girl's or something to that effect

OP posts:
YouOldSlag · 07/07/2012 14:26

*LeeCoakley because it is usually about a child that is independant minded and said negatively.

When you are called it you feel it as a rejection of your personality*

Really??? Take about overthinking!!

NarkedRaspberry · 07/07/2012 14:28

I would assume you were overreacting if it wasn't for this

'(I'm) worried it will stick as she gets older. They have already done this with an older gc.'

What do they say to/about their other GC?