To consider gina?

[Pickles77]

Okay AIBU to consider buying a gina ford book? I have the mumsnet baby book which is great... But got the impression most mumsnetters don't approve of gina ford? I'm not sure I will, I'm just intrigued by the fuss? And want to be the best mum
I can be...

I haven't read whole thread but I found my gina ford book while tidying today and just smiled ruefully at how little I knew when I believed ( briefly!) that her approach might be a good idea .

That said, in a society where intelligent and educated women know less than nothing about babies because they have never spent any time around them, then maybe they need an avaricious nanny to take their money and tell them what to do.

But in other cultures illiterate 14 year old girls often make a bloody good job of it based on nothing more than instinct and lived experience.

Tbh I've always been a bit puzzled why there is so much disagreement over routines vs go with the flow. If you like something and it works for you - great. If it doesn't - well surely that's fine too.

There is lots of differing advice out there, you just find what works for you, your baby and your family. And advice can always be accepted or discarded - followed or ignored.

Having a routine does not mean that you are 'not in tune with your baby' in fact it's the opposite. Baby's needs are often anticipated and identified easier as you know whats coming next. All the kids that i know that are problem sleepers never had a routine as a baby making life hell for their parents now. If you want to BF 24/7 and co sleep until your child starts school then that's your choice but it can't go on forever. At some point you will want them to settle by themselves to sleep in their own room and I'd rather teach a baby this than a toddler any day.

Worth repeating this post by monkeymoma

"she. does. not. tell. you. to. try. to. space. out. feeds. with. a. BF. newborn.
she tells you a MINIMUM amt of feeds they should have, and a max amt of time you should go between feeds - but she says if they want feeding sooner then FEED THEM

so its the opposite of spacing out feeds, its not NOT having too much space between feeds. (which, if your baby is doing itself - great! if not your supply will be affected if you feed on demand, cause sometimes on demand only feeding = LESS feeds than they need)"

I used Gina and EBF successfully until DS was 6mo and then continued BF and BLW until he was 16mo.

Personally I think her methods are unsympathetic and undermining to mothers' natural confidence and instincts. YANBU to read it but maybe balance it with this or www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_noss_1?url=search-alias%3Dstripbooks&field-keywords=margot+sunderland&x=0&y=0 or even www.amazon.co.uk/Birth-And-Beyond-Definitive-Pregnancy/dp/0091856949/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1340480707&sr=1-1 any of which you might find slightly more empowering.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/education-16354869

What does that have to do with GF Shebird?

shebird it's really annoying that you associate babies with no set routines with breast feeding 24/7 and sleeping with their parents until they're preschool.
What a cliche!

Forgive me Olimpia but as I said that's my experience of friends and family who have DCs that still don't sleep.

But it's not even that Olimpia. It is talking about children who don't have a set bedtime or meal times growing up. I am honestly baffled as to the link. Whether a baby has a routine at 13 weeks has bollock all to do with whether they have a consistent bedtime at 5 (or whatever). All the children I know have a rough routine of bedtime, morning and meals at age 3 (DD1's age). They were far more variable as babies.

Shag being illiterate doesn't make you not intelligent.

In the other cultures you speak about many of these 14 year olds will have gown up with babies and have their mothers/extended family in the same house or near by.

If I already knew what Gina taught nme I wouldn't have needed to buy the book.

Three-total tosh.I went to every baby/toddler group going with twins and a newborn a year later.Gina doesn't stop you doing anything.All us Gina mums simply left 10 mins earlier.Rem the mass exodus,you could spot the Gina mums a mile off.Twas quite bonding actually,we all had a giggle as we reclaimed buggies.

Doing you own thingand breastfeeding doesn't mean not having a routine it means developing the routine naturally thatis best for you and baby not what an alleged expert deems to be the best.

Rockpool - Why did you leave 10 minutes earlier? (Not taking the mick or being argumentative. Just genuinely ).

Inorder to get back for the lunch time feed and then subsequent 2 hour nap or whatever it was(a total utter sanity saver and god send).Loved it.I was starving then too.Can't rem the exact times but it suited as to a tee.

youlllaughaboutit thanks for the clarification. Even more ridiculous! Baby not on a set routine at 3 months = preschooler all over the place

What LucieMay said. DD developed her own routine pretty quickly! It has also changed every few months and we change with it.

EG. Latest one being her bedtime now appears to be 8pm and she will be rocked to sleep in minutes.
Previously it was 8.30pm and she would be fed to sleep.
Prior to that it was 7.30pm and a cuddle and singing lullabies worked.

I just follow her routines!

And doing what an "expert" suggests doesn't mean you're not doing your best for you and your baby.It's horses for courses and mothers who don't want to shouldn't be forced into demand feeding or to avoid routine advice.

Little great,glad that works for you,it would drive me utterly insane.

But why rush home for a specific time because someone in a book has told you too?!

Fair enough if it works for you, but after the baby and toddler group I'd put DS in the buggy and he'd usually sleep as we walked. I'd then do whatever I wanted - perhaps hang around for a bit chatting with other mums, perhaps go home, perhaps go shopping, or meet a friend.

I'd like to emphasise that I'm not saying I have a problem with routines per se (we let DS guide us into a routine, and we ended up naturally in a routine of sorts).

What I really object to is Gina Ford's constant reinforcement of the message that her way is the only way. I very much resen that!

Horses for courses! :)

How do you get your baby to sleep for exactly 2 hours? Just curious really

YANBU BUT you might find it's "not" for you.

I read the Gina book but didn't follow it. Didn't "fit" with me or my flexible style of parenting. Plus I think she's "cold"

However I do firmly believe that older babies (say from 8 weeks or so) do need some kind of routine otherwise they turn night into day. Personally I'm also not a fan of cosleeping.

So at 16 weeks, fed up of being up 5 times a night with DD2, with an active DD1 to look after I read the Baby Whisperer book. I honestly loved it. No controlled crying, just sensible advice. Within one night DD2 was only up once a night - never once did she cry about it either!

So I'd really recommend BW.

Rockpool - ah, I see. I do have quite a routine with my two, which I would say operates about 5 days out of 7 on average (other days other things intervene). I guess the difference is that if I was at toddler group I would leave at the end, head home, have lunch and they would go down 10 minutes later.

They were knackered generally after a baby group or playtime/tummy time at home,they had a massive feed,clean nappy,loved their moses basket and would just coo/kick/suck themselves to sleep.

Gina's feeding times and nap/play times worked to an absolute tee. There was never any "getting" them to do anything,they just did.Her routine just seemed to fit into their natural rhythm which they just couldn't find themselves.