To ask our wedding guest not to post any pics on Facebook?

[maxbradbury]

we are getting married in a few week and I want to ask our guest not to post any pictures of our wedding on Facebook until I've seen them.
I want to have total control over what people see and also I don't want any of the evening guest seeing any pics before they arrive.
Is there a polite way to say without sounding bridezilla?

Yep, YABU.

I can't wait to see our day captured from other people's perspective.

I'm getting a bit clenchy at the thought of all of the smartphone abuse that is likely to wind me up on the day I'm looking at you best friend and bridesman. Particularly since it's FA cup final day. But I just figure hey ho, one of my primary aims of the day is that everyone have the best time ever, and if that involves tapping about on their device then so be it.

I put a couple of wedding pics up the night I got in after the wedding reception. The bride thanked me and said it was so nice to see the photos the following day, because it had all gone so fast and it had all seemed a bit unreal.

Agree with mrs terrypratchett.

YABU. And weird.

surely a wedding is the one day when you expect people to take photos of you, and for others to see them.. of course you are being a control freak and a bridezilla!

No way to avoid it sounding bridezillaish as it IS bridezilla personified..

I don't think it's bridezilla - because of my job I don't have facebook so if anyone takes pictures of me I make sure they dont 'tag' or label my name - that way any clients I have can't find pictures of me on the Internet

I worked with a girl once who was getting married and wouldn't describe her dress or colour scheme as she didn't want it "getting out" before The Big Day, she was so puffed up about it. This thread reminded me of her. I mean really, who cares? Oh the Bride and maybe the Brides Mother, a bit.

Op do you think the evening guests will be logging onto FB in a desperate bid to catch an early glimpse?

I think I understand. It would be a bit like someone taking a pic of a new baby and sticking it on FB before the parents got a chance to put one up.
But if you mean no photos ever you are a bit bonkers

I think you are being a leeetle bridezilla but I do understand. For instance I am extremely fat and if FB had existed when I got married I would have banned all digital cameras

However YABU. Change your privacy setting instead. At least then they won't show up on your page...

Who gives a crap about these photos - you are going to look and feel amazing. You are above facebook crap.

"Is there a polite way to say without sounding bridezilla?"

No...

Laurie, the internet is so much more than just Facebook.

All they have to do is store photos of you in an open Photobucket account and it'll come straight up on Google images.

See all your points! I'm not really a control freak - I am quite a laid back person but tbh I've seen some really horrible pics of brides on fb recently ( I admit it I'm vain!) and really I just want to keep it private.

I've got it...is it because it will jeopardise your deal with Hello magazine?!

Have you sold your wedding to OK magazine then? If sol, YABNU. Otherwise YABSoooooooU.

Do you mean just photos of you, or any photos taken at the wedding at all? I think it's a bit weird either way. What is your reasoning?

I don't get the bit about the evening guests - seems a bit harsh that not only are they not invited to the main part of the wedding but aren't even allowed to see any photos of it? Or only at a time specified by you? Why all the secrecy, these are your friends surely, or you wouldn't be inviting them at all?

Actually, is this one of those reverse AIBUs? i.e. are you one of the guests?

Other people's photos of you are their own property and copyright lies with them. You have no rights over it. If you are so worried about your privacy and looking perfect, invite no one to your wedding except your photographer and photoshopper.

I don't get this ridiculous superstition about photos, even photos of children. What do you think people are going to do with them? Apart from disregard them if they themselves don't appear on the image, I mean?

But there are horrible pics of everyone on FB sometimes...not just brides.

Here's a little tale.

We recently went on a camping holiday. It pissed it down from start to finish, it was a miserable mudbath but we had fun.

My carefully edited and photoshopped pictures depicted a laugh-a-minute holiday with a few showers between glorious sunshine. My friend's photos depicted The Real Thing. Including me with 2 pairs of socks in flip flops geisha-style trying (and failing) to toast a marshmallow in the pissing down rain over a dwindling fire.

Everyone thought that the two wildly different photo albums was really funny, so did I. Fat arms n all.

You just have to let it go, OP.

It's a sport.... Take the most unflattering pic of a bride and post it on fb..

True worra which is why I wouldn't invite anyone who didn't realise that it was not appropriate to put pictures of me on the Internet. There are no photos of me on the Internet, no public profile at all.

Are you Victoria Beckham?

I've been to two weddings with this rule and I found it incredibly pretentious to be honest. The first wedding that had this rule then showed a slide show of photos of all the guests throughout the whole meal which we hadn't been warned/asked about..but we couldn't post photos of them they hadn't seen

After my own wedding day it was great seeing guests photos as they captured parts I'd missed and more natural less posed shots of people. So yes in my opinion YABU.

You can't control this so accept it and make sure you look good from the back..

Are you famous??