to think money does buy you happiness

[poorasachurchmouse]

Whoever came up with the saying "money can't buy you happiness" obviously never lived without any.

I feel so desperate today, I'm currently living on £163 a week for a family of four due to a few changes in circumstances - Weekly income isn't £163 as some of that is paid monthly, usual weekly income is £118.

It's been a bit of a shock to the system but I'm just about managing. This week however the worst has happened.

Not only has dd gone on a residential trip which I had to finish paying for and give spending money for, I've had 2 bills taken out of the bank.

luckily I've probably got enough in the freezer to do meals til Monday(next payday) but no bread or potatoes and no Gas(prepayment meter)

I've just had to walk half an hour to the nearest cashpoint that doesn't charge £1.99, just so that I could have an extra tenner - but had to pay everything I withdrew into my current account to cover the direct debits. I've now no money left in my savings account at all.

I don't know how I'm going to make it through the rest of the week, I feel sick, I feel like crying, I feel totally and utterly desperate. I just want to get into bed, pull the covers over my head and pretend my life doesn't exsist.

I'm afraid money does buy you happiness, or rather lack of it buys you a whole shit load of unhappiness

porasa, have you been to CAB? spoke to the people you are in debt with etc?

I do feel for you and I can completely relate to the crushing anxiety as for me, although passed now, it made it hard to even function, but do try and get help off people who know how to deal with certain situations and people. It will help, hopefully.

Well, I would have been happier had I had the money to afford the opportunity for my Dad to die in his own home.

I still wouldn't be pissing rainbows but money would have helped.

Hope things get easier for you all Cory, thinking of you.

And I agree entirely with Pagwatch. Money may not make you happy but lack of money can make you very miserable indeed.

I don't think money buys happiness - but being skint causes misery.

I get what Joan is driving at - you can't buy a quantity of something called 'happiness' with money, but it certainly does eliminate the misery and tyranny that worrying about ones finances can bring. In short it buys a far more comfortable class of un-happiness.

Eg the queen looks bloody miserable most of the time

that sums it up well, Sue and badtaste

I think it can. It buys ease and comfort and peace of mind and access to the best medicine if necessary and first class flights and a generally much more easeful and pleasant life.

If anyone gets any extra and doesn't think it will make them happier, I am delighted to relieve you of it.

Well if it helps I will give you all my money, my house and all it's contents if you can make DS2 better.

I know you would my darling.

But say your life is as it is. How is it better? With or without wong?

Exchanging money for X is a different proposition.

Exchanging money for a situation is a different thing. Most of us would rather be skint than have bad health or lose a loved one. But if I have to lose a loved one, I would rather be able to afford to travel to see them one last time, to phone them and hear their voice, to afford a funeral. If a situation cannot be changed, money can often take away the unnecessary extra worry.

Ah. I've read the thread now.

I am talking at a cross purpose. I do see your point, Paggy.

Cory, I am truly sorry to heat that.

hear

OP YANBU. Money doesn't prevent awful things from happening, but lack of money makes everything that much worse, adding another strain to every problem.

Money buys less anxiety I think. If I had money I wouldn't have been up all night last night trying to work out how whether we eat next week or whether we put petrol in the car so that DH can go to work

I have had money and disposable income and been miserable. I have had no money at all in any bank account and been blissfully happy.

Un-MN-ty hug to you OP, feeling your pain!

All the resarch seems to show money up to a point brings happiness, and then its neutral if not a cause of unhappiness.

Having a comfortable amount of money makes life a little easier. Having no money (and I mean being broke, not being able to buy enough to feed yourself etc - not not being able to go on holiday once a year or get your nails done every week) causes so much stress it can make you ill and lead to depression and anxiety. Obviously people with money can have hardship in their lives as well but if they had those same hardships and had to worry about where the next tenner to feed their child/pay a bill was coming from they would feel more desperate and stressed than they did already.

"But money simply cannot guarantee a life free from sadness and tragedy."

Thats not at all the same thing as saying money can buy happiness. It's fairly obvious that money can't guarantee any such thing. That doesn't mean you can't buy happiness.

YANBU

I would significantly happier if I had money.

I have some very specific dreams, and with money I could make them happen within a few years. How amazing would that be!

There are two questions

1. Can money buy you happiness? ie improve the quality of your life, to which I think yes

and

1. Can money solve all your sources of unhappiness? To which obvs I say no.

Money can't buy happiness however it can buy the basic necessities of life that you need in order to survive (eg food, shelter, fuel, clothing etc). If you have enough money that you can buy these things and enough left over for a few luxuries and some savings then that makes for a much less stressful life. Not happiness as such but certainly not living in perpetual anxiety about making ends meet. That really is misery.

Lack of money can cause unhappiness. It doesn't mean that the opposite is true. That's a false argument.

Of course it can help in certain circumstances, but for anyone with a problem that money can't resolve, then money becomes fairly meaningless. It won't make your partner love you if they don't, it won't cure an incurable illness, or raise the dead.
Lack of money is a genuine problem, but just because it creates one set if problems, doesn't mean it will resolve other ones.

Money helps up to the point where you have enough to cover your basic needs - so being skint isn't your main concern- but any additional money doesn;t make you happy- you just focus on other concerns.It is the same as health really- when you are or a loved one are sick then you think as long as you got better you'd be happy for ever but its not the case.
I have enough money to be secure but whereas if it was taken away I would be unhappy (i think- although I would get to leave work!) - i don't wake up happy because I've got money - being able to pay bills is a nothing once you can do it?

Oh and having been depressed having theoretical access to help made no difference- cliche as it sounds its the things money can't buy that mattered

It can;t stop awful things happening, of course not, it can;t buy happiness but it can prevent certain types of unhappiness.

Having a bit of extra money meant we could pursue miscarriage investigations with a top consultant, had an answer and treatment plan in 6 weeks not wait to have a third miscarraige before NHS investigations kicked in and half the tests would not have been done anyway.
I can;t tell you the utter depths and despair I felt at the time, no money in the world made me feel better but it helped to get us out of the hole we were in.

Do you think so tomverlaine ? Every time I am able to just pay a bill without thinking, I rejoice. It is something that I never quite get over.

Skint again at the mo, though.