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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be very upset that the teacher forgot ds's birthday today?

109 replies

Ouluckyduck · 19/06/2012 22:25

he is six today and has special needs. He had been so excited - " I will give out the sweets today Mummy, they will sing for me Mummy"

I gave her the bag of sweets in the morning and he wore a badge saying "I'm six". When I picked him up at the end of the day he was rying his eyes out, so upset because his birthday hadnt been acknowledged at all. His teacher said "sorry we'll do it tomorrow" but in a very lofty way. I then said "it means so much to him you know" and she said well he might be "creating" now Hmm but he'll be fine and she just forgot, he should have reminded her. Which makes me think she doesnt know or understand him at all, he wouldn't know how to remind her, he hasn't got the verbal or social skills! We had a nice afternoon then and he is fine, but I still feel really cross about it.

OP posts:
LindyHemming · 19/06/2012 22:28

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LucieMay · 19/06/2012 22:29

Does she celebrate birthdays for the other kids?

Curlybrunette · 19/06/2012 22:30

She sounds dreadful. Fair enough if ds hadn't given sweets or had a badge on but it was blatantly his birthday.
I am so upset for you and your ds. I would have to speak to her about it and make her realise that her behaviour was wrong. Though to be truthful I would need dh in with me cos I would cry like a baby the minute I got in there I'm a soft sod that cries easily in situations like that

Give ds a huge hug from me tomorrow x

Original poster
Ouluckyduck · 19/06/2012 22:30

Yes she does which lead to his expectations what it would be like!

OP posts:
StealthPolarBear · 19/06/2012 22:32

Ohhhh, ay this age its such a big deal. I know ds loved being the centre of attention when he turned 5. Poor little thing :(

Curlybrunette · 19/06/2012 22:33

X posts! I think in yr 1 the children are still so young and whether the teacher has a thousand things to do if she couldn't take 1 minute at registration to let all the children sing happy birthday to their friend then that's poor.

BigHairyFlowers · 19/06/2012 22:33

Poor chap Sad

It can't be that hard to remember, if he has a badge on!?

EverybodysSleepyEyed · 19/06/2012 22:33

That's awful - your poor DS

I'm glad he had a lovely afternoon - hopefully he will get an extra big Happy Birthday tomorrow

Do you have any concerns about how your DS special needs are being dealt with at the school? I guess he will have a new teacher in September so hopefully she will understand him better

PoppyWearer · 19/06/2012 22:34

Poor DS Sad.

cece · 19/06/2012 22:35

I am very surprised that the children let her forget, expecially if there were sweets involved. I am notorious for forgettting to give out letters etc but the kids always remind me about birthday sweets!

ApocalypseThen · 19/06/2012 22:36

Poor little fellow! I really hope the teacher makes it up to him tomorrow, properly.

Well, there are lots of old, boring people who are glad he had a nice birthday in the end. By the way, I got no sweets.

ReportMeNow · 19/06/2012 22:37

Ah, that's such a shame. I know that teachers can be massively busy and might genuinely forget, but her offhand tone at the end of day wasn't very thoughtful and more could have been done to console the wee chap on his birthday.

Maryvivienne · 19/06/2012 22:40

I agree. It's a poor show. That is a real shame. Even if she was busy you would have thought she'd have found the time. Hope your DS had a good birthday.

MammaTJ · 19/06/2012 22:41

Aw, that's horrible!! She better make it up to him tomorrow. Is there a TA in the class. I often find they are better at remembering these things. The one in my DSs class is fabulous and I generally approach her if I need something sorting out (she is good at making reminding us parents to return forms too). Prehaps a word in that direction?

Mspontipine · 19/06/2012 22:41

WHAT a cowbag - I'm fuming on your behalf Angry

Matesnotdates · 19/06/2012 22:44

That's just crap. Bless him. This post made me sad.

storminabuttercup · 19/06/2012 22:45

Poor little dude!

I'm afraid I would have cried for him. She's obviously not paying much attention to the class if she doesn't notice a birthday badge. Sad

gingerchick · 19/06/2012 22:46

Poor wee man, so sad for him I would definitely be having a word with the teacher at some point, in my daughters class the birthdays of every child. I hope he is ok now bless him, cried reading your post [hormonal]

gingerchick · 19/06/2012 22:47
  • are on the wall ffs
redwineformethanks · 19/06/2012 22:47

Ah poor wee thing

NihilDeclaro · 19/06/2012 22:48

Makes me sad too... and I'd be feeling just as you do.

Can you give him an extra special treat to make him smile? That's what I' do- something with the wow factor.

Mind you, I am a soft touch when it comes to my 5 year old son!

EndoplasmicReticulum · 19/06/2012 22:49

That's rubbish. If she is going to "do" birthdays she should make sure she remembers everybody's.

Original poster
Ouluckyduck · 19/06/2012 22:51

Stop being so blooming kind everybody, I am crying my eyes out now Sad

OP posts:
CharltonHairstyle · 19/06/2012 22:53

Poor wee thing!Sad

I hope he had a wonderful day with you at home. What a rotter the teacher is!

TuftyFinch · 19/06/2012 23:01

Happy Birthday luckyduck's DS. Poor little thing, if the teacher had shown any concern at all at forgetting it would have softened the blow a bit but... Sad
Not fair. Remind her tomorrow in front of his class mates and say 'sweets' really loudly.

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