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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

AIBU to think that women should not have to be discreet when breastfeeding?

633 replies

lalaland3008 · 13/06/2012 18:57

I'm not saying that anyone should purposely flop both boobs out into someones dinner. But it makes me really mad that some people think women should have to be discreet when feeding their baby, sit in a corner or breastfeeding 'booth'.

I also think a breast is just not comparable to a penis to a vagina and if people are offended because they see breasts as purely sexual then that is their own problem.

Noone would object to me sitting in public drinking my coffee or feeding my baby a bottle of cows milk yet people find breastmilk offensive.

I'm not bitty mad I lasted 2 weeks breastfeeding but it still makes my blood boil that it is seen as controversial by many.

AIBU?

OP posts:
Socknickingpixie · 22/06/2012 09:23

Well in the last 18 years Ive not even managed to put my socks on with dignity

exerlent post I'm a 34hh as well so I'm totally with you on that I know it's not nice having to stop befor you want to bit I enjoyed Reading your post and it's a great example of exactly what were trying to express to the people who send the judgey looks

StealthPolarBear · 22/06/2012 09:27

Oh sorry for the assumption, have to admit bybthe time I'd got to the end of that epic I had forgotten the details at Tje beginning and its not easy to scroll on my phone :)
Thanks for Tje cookie, virtual chocolate chunk, my favourite and zero calories :o

PantyLace · 22/06/2012 09:38

Easilybored, you can raise me by as many bra cups as you like. I stand by my view. There is no need to be waving your breast in stranger's faces because you're having a problem latching baby on. Learn to get it right before trying it out in public. Not everyone likes babies or other people's children and they don't have to put up with it just because you chose to breed. I'm a breeder too but just like I don't foist badly behaved children on the general public I don't expect to have to put up with a mum having a hard time with a sicking up baby in my face. If you have problems like that then stay at home and feed your child. Your issue is not my problem and I don't need you to make it mine. Simple.

I had one bottle fed baby who projectile vomited after every feed, so we stayed at home until he was well enough to be socialised.

Why is it that mother's believe that because they chose to breed their and their baby's rights take presidence over the general public's?

As I said before, we expect people to have table manner and general manners, but breast feeding mums are exempt?

PantyLace · 22/06/2012 09:40

I breast feed my two other children who did take to it, but I learned to get it right before I did it out in public.

StealthPolarBear · 22/06/2012 09:46

Well done you. What a blinkered and unsupportive view you have. If you had a friend who was stuck in the hose with pns but scared to venture out because shed have to feed in public, would your advice be quite as harsh and uncaring?

WhosPickleisThatOnion · 22/06/2012 09:48

Wow. Just wow. I'm speechless really. So you are telling new mothers that they are practically housebound. What a nice attitude.

PantyLace · 22/06/2012 09:49

My advice would be, if you're having a hard time feeding your baby find a space away from people who may be offended/not take kindly to having to deal with the troubles you are having.

StealthPolarBear · 22/06/2012 09:49

Well done you. What a blinkered and unsupportive view you have. If you had a friend who was stuck in the house with pnd but scared to venture out because shed have to feed in public, would your advice be quite as harsh and uncaring?

StealthPolarBear · 22/06/2012 09:51

Sorry for double post, phone hangs on post message

WhosPickleisThatOnion · 22/06/2012 09:52

It's far more important to build confidence out and about than cower in the house frightened to leave because some people may faint at the sight of a nipple or a newborn baby bringing up a bit of milk.

sowaddayasay · 22/06/2012 09:52

PantyLace I have yet to see a mother waving her breasts at any stranger.

That's the problem with hyperbole, it really doesn't help in this case because you're. It just exaggerating, you're actively lying.

Unless you were at a strip milk bar.

Also, there's a massive difference between a sick child that vomits and may be sick and infectious to a baby that vomits milk. You can't catch anything from that so there's no point to be quarantined.

I also try to make sure my children don't make unnecessary noise but thank god my breasts have no shouting ability nor do they fly off at people's faces so you can't blame them for causing any trouble.

Socknickingpixie · 22/06/2012 09:53

Pantylace I'm actually shocked that there are people in the world who have attitudes like yours,your post reads as tho you have gone out of your way to be offensive.
How uneducated does one have to be to belive that a baby sicking up is a behaviour issue? I'm utterley bemused

sowaddayasay · 22/06/2012 09:54

Sorry, my phone corrected my writing bizarrely.

I meant that by talking of a mother waving her breasts at strangers you're not just exaggerating, you're probably lying.

PantyLace · 22/06/2012 09:55

I haven't a clue what you're accusing me of lying about sowaddayasay.

I don't care that I can't catch any virus from a sicking up baby on mother's milk. I don't have to put up with the sick up of another woman's offspring. Just like the general public don't have to put up with virused child sicking up on everything.

PantyLace · 22/06/2012 09:56

I don't see a sicking up baby as a behaviour issue of the baby. There is not need for the mother to foist that on the general public though, is there?

StealthPolarBear · 22/06/2012 09:57

Actually I think pantylace's motto "your issue is not my problem" works both ways.
I'm out. I'm feeding a baby. No guarantees you won't see some nipple. Grow up, get over it or get out of my face. Breastfeeding mums are people too nd have as much right to be in the average cafe or shop as 'real' people

PantyLace · 22/06/2012 09:57

As for the uneducated comment, well fuck off!

RandomNumbers · 22/06/2012 09:57

We think you are lying about boobs being waved about, it's not possible ergo you are lying
Unless you are using inflated language and exaggeration of course Smile

whackamole · 22/06/2012 09:58

Unless you sit next to breastfeeding mothers at the cinema, I really can't see how a sicking up baby or a mother having trouble latching baby one is going to be 'in your face'.

And children running around and shouting etc cannot be compared to a newborn baby sicking up! Or even an older baby - they are BABIES!

PantyLace · 22/06/2012 09:59

Of course non of you breast feeding mums have never seen mums waving them about. It was probably you!

StealthPolarBear · 22/06/2012 10:00

Well that's not very dignified

PantyLace · 22/06/2012 10:01

Oh God I knew the wolf pack would come out. No the baby cannot help being sick. But mother knows baby will be sick but still chooses to foist that on the general public. Nice.

Oh precious precious breast feeding mums.

RandomNumbers · 22/06/2012 10:04

I don't understand why you are now objecting to possetting babies

goodness me Confused

Metalelephant · 22/06/2012 10:05

PantyLace you're choosing to be rude and a bit horrid and inflict that on the mums here. Pity.

Socknickingpixie · 22/06/2012 10:05

So do you see it as a behaviour issue of the mother?

That has got to be the funniest most twatish thing I have ever heard next you will be accusing old people of foisting there oldness on you it's the same thing babies sick up mild it's normal because there tummies arnt as well devolped as adults.it's not being ill
It is a fact of life that if you go out in public you will see babies children adults and perhaps an animal or two if you have a problem with people of any description being foisted on you perhaps you should stay in