Don't know how to deal woth this situation, aibu not to go?

[Carlia]

DH, our 3 young DC, puppy and I have been asked my my Grandmother in Northern Scotland to go and visit her again this year (we went last year)...

The only problem is we now have a young puppy who we cannot leave behind and more importantly we absolutely cannot afford it, we checked our finances yesterday and we really really can't... My Grandma offered to pay, which we were reluctant to accept but she has not said she is sending £1000 in the post. It is actually going to cost around £2000 and I don't know how to handle this situation...

I am really embarrassed and don't feel I can say anything to her a. that we can't go or b. that we can't afford it, as she has been more than generous. I asked my mum whether she could mention it to her as it might be less awkward coming from her and she said no way.

What shall I do? We do all really want to go, had some issues with planning the route (11 hours in car with kids, not ideal!) but had it worked out, just can't afford it!

How will it cost so much?

£2000?
I'd pay that for a good holiday abroad.
How is it going to be so expensive?

Oh, I forgot to add, I live in the North of Scotland.

It's £1000 for the cottage, £300 petrol (there & back) £260 overnight stopovers (there & back), £340 for roof rack & roof box.. It's insane!

£2000 to get five people in a car to scotland? Really?

Take a tent and camp - lots of lovely dog friendly camp sites in scotland, surely.

Could you go by train? Quicker, possibly cheaper if you book in advance, easier for the kids, cheap B&B?

Yes you're right - it's insane.

Your grandmother is desparate to see you and her great grandchildren.

Can't you leave the puppy and DH at home during the summer hols and you go for a shorter time with the DCs?

£2000!!?? We have just been all inclusive to a greek island - 5 of us - for a few hundred more than that!

Rent a cheaper cottage, find b&b accommodation for the stopovers, do you really need a roof rack and roof box? And if so can't you just borrow them or get some on freecycle?

We live in the south and when we travelled to the North of Scotland, 543 miles from us, with two babies and two dogs we seldom had overnight stops. We just thought it prolonged the agony,

Train is around £650 return, we would then need to rent a car to get us to where she lives so it's more expensive.

No way we are camping, really would not want to do that as weather was really cold last year and 18 month old would be a nightmare in a tent.

It is the only cottage available in the village, believe me I have looked into cheaper options!! DH doesn't want to drive straight through although we did consider it.

£1000 is a huge amount to pay for a cottage, and a B&B en route for stops shouldn't cost £130 a night.

Look on laterooms for B&Bs, freecycle or e-bay for roofboxes and check out caravan parks instead of cottages!

£1000 for a draughty cottage in Scotland??

£2000?!?! How are you getting there, gilded carriage?! I grew up in the far northern Highlands and now live in central Scotland, and I can't fathom any way that it should cost two thousand pounds for a family and dog to travel from England-somewhere to the north.

No way should you spend over £1000 that you haven't got on a holiday. Your costings don't include any food or spending money when you get there so its going to cost well over £2000.

Honesty is the best/only policy here even if it upsets your grandmother. It would be very selfish of her to expect you visit in these circumstances.

Im sure you could get a cottage for cheaper, even at peak time

We've been to scotland in summer holidays and new year for just over £500 for a really nice three bedroomed cottage with views, this was two and three years ago but prices cant have gone up that much.

Which area are you looking at op?

She doesn't want us to stay with her as she thinks it would be too much with 3 DC and a dog...

Cottage is extortionate I agree, hotel that will sleep 5 plus dog is the cheapest we could find.

Really you need all that? You need to buy a new roof rack and a top box to visit your gran in Scotland?

What sort of cottage is that, with gold toilet seats?

Kennels for the puppy and a family room at a travel lodge for overnights if you feel they are needed. Or any other family you could stay with to break the journey. Your Grandmother is obviously desperate to see you. Camping is another option, you could buy a brilliant tent and get site fees with the money she is sending. Ask friends or advertise asking to hire a roof rack. There are ways to do it cheaper.

(Ha, I posted and then all the replies showed up, sorry!)

You'd be cheaper driving the way up and stopping in a travel lodge-type hotel on the way up. Or, as someone said before, leave DH and the puppy at home and get an easyjet or Ryanair to Inverness, then hire a car.

Oh, sorry X-posted with your post about the cottage. I assumed she wanted you to stay with her.

Roof rack and roof box can be borrowed/hired (ouers spends most of its life cluttering my Mum's garage and getting broken.

Overnight stop-offs not necessary if you set off at 2am (as my DDad used to every year on our family treck to the Far North). Get an early night, and sleep for 5/6 hours. Put sleeping DCs in car at 2am, drive on empty roads for 5/6 hours non-stop. Stop for breakfast and s leg-stretch. Set off again at 9 (missing rush hour). Stop for lunch at 1. Arrive destination around 4/5.

Your Gma is paying for the cottage, and not much to buy up there so you'll not need much spending money, so you're getting a family holiday for your £300 petrol money, not bad really!

It's the only cottage in teh village now available (wonder why?!)