AIBU in thinking that the IPOAT hall has transported to another dimension

[Minimammoth]

Where has it gone? Just as I was about to start sprucing it up for the jubilee and start tatting the bunting?

Pray do tell us your travels and travails dear Mimi. I confess myself riveted by your long absence and utter silence. Surely you weren't bound in a nunnery?

juuuust checking the hall was still here....elegant sconces...are they new?

Ah, I remember vividly our time in the monastery near Mimi's hideaway in the South of France. Were you, perhaps, sojourning with the friars again?

Alas dear Hully, a long and fearsome tale. You may recall my little millinary business...how well it was doing! until my rapacious landlord flung me into the street as he cunningly tried to exploit the popularity of the quartier. no business - and no garret to retire to! alas how swiftly my fortunes changed! i rent my bodice and railed at fickle fortuna. accompanied only by my young page D'Ess, i sought refuge at the house for Fallen Women. There I have resided, lost in a melancholy delerium. aided only by a raggle toothed crone and a small rat. i need tisane! my throat is parched and my soul weary at the recounting of these troubled days...

Alas dear Hully, a long and fearsome tale. You may recall my little millinary business...how well it was doing! until my rapacious landlord flung me into the street as he cunningly tried to exploit the popularity of the quartier. no business - and no garret to retire to! alas how swiftly my fortunes changed! i rent my bodice and railed at fickle fortuna. accompanied only by my young page D'Ess, i sought refuge at the house for Fallen Women. There I have resided, lost in a melancholy delerium. aided only by a raggle toothed crone and a small rat. i need tisane! my throat is parched and my soul weary at the recounting of these troubled days...

Oh Mimi, a sorru tale indeed. Was it all quite quite lost? What labours must you turn to now? And how fares young D'Ess since the troubled matter of his schooling?

ICBINEG are the last two letters a clue to your state and gender?

Eh? am flummoxed by your cryptic utterences my dear...alas all is nt resolved. however D'Ess is doing splendidly at dame school and is in the top sets for tatting, apothecary Studies and tisane makind. all core skills.

Oh Mimi, what troubled days! Hie you back to the bosom of the Hall. Is there naught we can do to help?

Hully's detective skills at identification of ICBINEG.

please explain i am agog...

Madame Hully, as ever you see straight through any disguise with a perspicacity I can scarce credit.

I believe she is a young female who tends towards equilibrium. My own absence earlier this year was of some length, but I believe that she may have joined our merry band during your sabbatical, and as such you are not acquainted.

ICBINEG, MadameDefarge; MadameDefarge, ICBINEG.

I don't know how one pronounces it.

ICBINEG introduced us to the delights of space travel, and large hadron collider mousseline.

Gels and Dear ladies! At last life returns to the Hall. Mini has been languishing in the haha and I have been slaving away under the table in the distillery herb-drying shed.

All is ready but I must warn you, Mr Rochester's leg has been a tad orf in this heat.

Fresh tisanes on the verandah later. I look forward to your tales of goats and beard-stroking.

Ah dear Fidsy! How hale you look! I believe your sojourn neath the table has restored the very tincture of youth to your cheek

Indeed. I must add that during my window-flinging and dust-sheet hiding I heard tales of fannying with flowers. I do so love to offer something new at the village fete.

A delightful idea! I believe it wa Mistress Pag that brought the custom from the continent and was eager to pass on her skills and decorative deftness

The WI will be agog.

She was always a spare. We still have Agatha, Bagatha and the lovely Dave.

I have always had a soft spot for Bagatha, her bunions send me a tremble, so red and tender

It's all become a bit unguents and bunions around here. Where is the eurhythmy? Where is the stirrup cup? Where are the gentlemen? Hmmm?

Gentlemen? What do you think Mini and I have been doing this summer while you lot gallivanted around with your goats, pray?

Well, we didn't pray at all much.

And as for eurythmy, she left us to pay a massive bill in the pub. Mini and I still can't show our faces in the Duck and Run.

Speaking of chaps, I bumped into this chap earlier, hanging about the gates of the Hall. He said he was the son of Mimi and Sheik D'Jerbouti! The finangling whippersnapper fibberwhack, dear Mimi couldn't possibly have a son of his age!

no dear....it must be umamis lurve child

Hullz - your name sake is posting in AIBU and needs some advice

Oh dear, so many husbands, so confusing. But I think you are right, tis the Widow's indeed, and she is certainly long enough toothed.

Namesake absy?