To think it's rude to take little girls to a wedding in bridesmaids dresses...

[Dyeingforachange]

...when they aren't the actual bridesmaids? Does this rank alongside wearing women wearing white to weddings?

In fact I recently went to a wedding on a hospital ward, the bride and groom had just been told that the bride had only a few weeks to live. Makes me wonder why we spend our time worrying about things like clothing etiquette.

Yes, it's rude. DH's 3yo Goddaughter was brought to our wedding in a very bridesmaidy white ensemble and when she tried to get into all of the photos (just being a typical 3yo) I think a lot of guests assumed she was a bridesmaid/flower girl, whereas only my DSis was. But the outfit she was in was an "interesting" choice.

Now have 3yo DD of my own, going to a wedding soon and have deliberately chosen a bright floral frock to avoid any such issues.

Good lord, I can't believe people get so overheated at what small girls wear to a wedding.

FWIW DD1 has been a bridesmaid three times. One dress was very bridesmaidy (white silk), but was so trashed with chocolate/juice during the reception it went into the dressing-up box after a quick wash, and was happily worn while playing with mates/on the schoolrun/in the sandpit for at least a year afterwards.

The other two dresses were not white, and were much more party-ish. They were most certainly put to good use at formal events afterwards. Yes, even weddings (although not accessorised with a floral headress and basket of flowers). Especially the one from Monsoon that I had to pay £60 for; no way was that going to be worn once only!

People really care what a little girl wears to a party she doesn't even understand wedding?

Totally agree with tunip

If it was the exact same dress done on purpose it would be a little weird. But it wouldn't bother me, at my wedding my niece was stood at the front wearing a white frock and veil (guffaw) but she was only five (would not have been so hilarious if she was an 18 year old stunner though)

Talking about adult dresses, I avoid buying stuff from coast if I am a guest at a wedding because their party dresses are very bridesmaidy, and I would be so embarrassed if I turned up looking like some desperate wannabe bridesmaid.

I am agog at the wedding hi-jackers!

Maybe if no one asks Baby Goo to be a brisdesmaid before she is 6 I'll just dress her up and start hanging around outside churches on Saturday mornings.

I did this

My cousins wedding me and ex turned up with his DD, i had bough her a lilac party dress, she was two. She looked adorable. All the guests seemed to be fawning over her and of course we thought it was down to how sweet she was.

Then the bride and her flock of maids turned up in white/lilac dresses.... I didnt know, my cousin never said anything so dont know if she was bothered or not.

How could I have predicted what colour the girls would be wearing?

I cant think of anything i would be less bothered about tbh!

Thanks to this thread I've decided I'm going to have a do for our silver wedding.

The dress code will be dress up like a bride/bridesmaid for the girls and kilts or morning suits for the fellas.

It will be just like a moonie mass wedding, can't wait.

Pukecatcher. What possessed your niece's mum to dress her in a white dress and veil for your wedding .
I'd have laughed too, but I'd still have thought wtf?????

Floggingmolly : the white dress was by design, the veil - well she insisted on wearing her mums veil to be like me - awww, it was easier for her to let it go and get to the church on time rather than have the screaming ab dabs. SIL did apologise sheepishly though. DN wore my stole for most of the photos too :)

Thank god I have boys, what a pallaver!

Hi, u don't think it's a problems unless like atmy sil wedding where my dd was bridesmaid, my dps cousin & sbs partner(same person!!!) deliberately bought same dress as my dds bridesmaid dress- which was ordered in separately- sil and mil were livid as there's only 4mnth diff between our dds!! That was a blatant case of trying to get her daughter involved!! There was however other little girls in some gorgeous dresses that looked very cute

I can see why some girls grow up so princessy if their mothers only have this kind of crap to worry about.

coming to think of it, a littl egirl did wear what looked like a bridesmaids dress to my wedding.

however my dress was red, as was my bridesmaid... i thought 'ooh, what a pretty dress!'

Now really annoyed at having to buy a new dress to attend a wedding when DD has a beautiful ivory one already that never gets used! It seems so wasteful. Why do people have these silly sensibilities, they never would have years ago about a child's dress.

I was a bit grrr at my wedding - as nephew and xbil - who weren't part of the actual bridal party wore ties the same colour as the bm dresses. Dsis was a bm - and dressed her men accordingly. I did point it out ot her, but my subtle hints were obv too subtle...

Really? Wow!

KatieScarlet your silver 'do' sounds brilliant!

Can I add to the stories.... friends wedding, friend of groom turns up in HER OWN WEDDING DRESS . To be fair it looked much more like an elaborate bridesmaid's dress although very different to the slinky official bridesmaid's dresses.

Guests were asking bride, who is the bridesmaid, who is not a bridesmaid? !

What actually qualifies a dress as a bridesmaid dress? Maybe it was just a dress that the child liked, or already owned. Unless it was identical to the dress that any bridesmaid wore, then no one would think they were a bm would they?

I don't get the fuss really. So what if a little girl wants to wear a pretty dress?

My best friend and sis in law both wore cream dresses to my wedding, they both asked if I minded and I said of course not, stand next to the groom and say I do and I will be pissed off but wear what you like .

I was marrying the man I love, could not have cared less what anyone was wearing.

A little girl wearing a pretty dress to a wedding - oh no, must be the first sign of the apocalypse, the wedding will be ruined

Though of course if the parents are loons and accessorize the dress with tiara and flowers and shove the little girl in all the photos... well that would be different, and I could understand people being annoyed.

As for wearing white to a wedding, I wouldn't do it myself as I'm aware it does offend some brides, but I can't say I would have had a fit if someone had worn white to my wedding unless they accessorized with a veil. Not really worth getting worked up about IMO [laid back]

ack I cant bring myself to get het up about such stuff. I had two older children as bridesmaids and a friend arrived with her young daughter in a dress to match. It was adorable that the little girl was so so pleased to be wearing a pretty frock.

painauchoc don't be daft, just let her wear the dress she has! The bride might not even notice/care and if she does.... tough. She's a wee girl in a pretty dress - some people just need to get over themselves.