To not feel comfortable with this?

[SpaghettiTwirlerAndProud]

I'm going bridesmaid shopping with my sister on sunday, and the original plan was that DP would have DD. But now DP wants to work on our extension instead so said his mum can have her for a few hours. MIL has said this is fine but I'm not happy with it. MIL was in an accident a few years ago and has a very badly damaged leg which has left her limited with her mobility. She is already looking after her eldest sons baby 8mo who is just crawling, DD is 10mo, crawling like lightening, walking round the furniture and into EVERYTHING.

I'm just not happy with her looking after 2 crawling babies at once when her mobility isn't the best. She says she is happy to have DD but she tends to overdo things. She kind of ignores her disablity iyswim?

I can't take DD with me. Going to MeadowHell (if anyone doesn't know what that is, it's a massive shopping centre). I took DD when she was 5mo and it was awful, she was so bored and it would be worse if I took her now.

AIRBTU?

Shrugs.

Tell your DP then.

He will have to look after dd himself or find someone else you do approve of. If she keeps your dd to one room with toys I can't see it would be too much bother. Childcare is not an Olympic sport you know.

Are you sure you aren't being over precious? I doubt MIL would have offered if she didn't think she could manage and if she already looks after one crawling baby I'm sure she will be fine. It's not like she will be planning a 100 metre sprint

I would have thought it's up to her to decide what she's physically capable of, not you. I have mobility problems. I'd be absolutely livid if someone tried to second guess my capabilities. But ultimately it's up to you. Your child.

I'd feel the same as you and make DP stick to the original plan. It's not up to mil to decide what she is capable of with a child that isn't hers.

I took DD when she was 5mo and it was awful, she was so bored and it would be worse if I took her now

Sorry but im a bit at a 5 month old being bored!

Its up to you..your feelings etc but I think YABU.

I would let her if she thinks she is up to it.

which shop sells bridesmaids?

The thing is, DD is the kind of baby that wants constant attention and entertainment. That's also why she was bored when I took her at 5mo. MIL is the kind of person to leave her with a few toys and go and do some housework leaving DD alone, she thinks I've made DD the way she is by holding her too much. She has lots of low surfaces with lots of breakable things on, and also a brick hearth with no guard around it. I would also be concerned about DD and her cousin being left in this room alone and one of them cracking their heads on the hearth or climbing up and breaking ornaments.

My four month old was bored when we watched daybreak this morning she much prefers Bbc breakfast news and a copy of the ft

Oh, so you aren't concerned for mils health I was right all along

I'm sure she will be fine!

She might want attention all day but it wont hurt her or scar her for life if she doesnt get it!!

I'm not happy with the way MIL does things with babies either. She prefers the CIO method rather than comforting. Back in November we went to BILs birthday party at his house, we took DD and put her to bed upstairs. She woke up and MIL went to go settle her and after a few minutes the baby monitor went silent so I thought "Oh great she's gone back to sleep!" I wandered off and thought no more about it.

3 hours later MIL reappers "I've just got DD back to sleep!" turns out she'd switched off the monitor upstairs and decided to get DD to sleep herself without fetching me. Poor DD ended up crying herself to sleep (she only needed me to settle her) in MILs arms. She wouldn't let ANYONE but me hold her for about 2 weeks after this, even her dad couldn't hold her.

Methinks you are a bit PFB. Babies get used to other people apart from their main carer, you know.

I don't understand your dh , why would he think it was ok to pass the buck to his mum if her health is not good ? Also shopping with babies is easy it's when they want to walk everywhere that creates problems !

Could MIL come to your house to look after DD? Your DH would be on hand if needed, MIL won't have housework to distract her, DD will be in familiar, safe environment.
But tbh, I think you are being a bit overprotective and unfair on MIL.

It might be an idea to get your DD used to not being constantly entertained and given attention, once shes at nursery/school/childminder etc she certainly wont get it!

Stick her in her buggy with a sausage roll rice cake and take her with you , she will be fine

Well if your DP won't look after his dd, who is if you won't let MIL look after her.

I agree with you OP. I don''t think you should leave your baby with someone that you are not totally happy about.

The only solution to this is to talk to your dh and tell him that you want him to look after the baby.

Take her with you. I don't see the issue at all.