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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To get dd to pay for her own hair?

152 replies

mosschops30 · 21/04/2012 09:05

Me and dh normally pay as present or treat round birthday/xmas because she normally has a cut and colour (£75). But she wants it cut today so roughly £35-£40 unless she goes to a junior and might be a bit cheaper.
I cant afford to pay for it this month, have had to pay for full time childcare on a part time wage as i start new job on monday so thats £500 im down.

She has £40 easter money and £20 from babysitting but when i said she could use that she said 'thats all my money nearly gone then' Hmm. To which dh replied 'yes welcome to the world'!

So AIBU to make her pay for her own haircut today? My only other option is to put it on my ever expanding credit card

OP posts:
skybluepearl · 21/04/2012 23:17

16 does seem young to be having such expensive cuts and colours. look into getting a home hairdresser for all of you at the same time. There are some fab ones about because they earn more working for themselves.

QuintessentialShadows · 21/04/2012 23:19

Why does she need to colour her hair?

BellaVita · 21/04/2012 23:20

I have two boys (well 3 including DH) Grin. He goes every three weeks for his cutting - costs about £15 every time.

£35 every six weeks for the DS's

Mine is... When I have it cut £25, the next time will be half head of colour and a cut £47, then after six weeks a cut and then i will be due a full head of colour and a cut which is £55. Although now when I just have it cut (from next time) I will have my roots touched up (going grey) and this will be an extra £14 on top of the £25.

My hair is bobbed, it goes out of shape easily if not maintained.

So yes, all year every year.

AngelsOnHigh · 21/04/2012 23:24

I sit on the train and watch all the girls from a VERY private school pile on.

They all look so young and fresh. Beautiful shining hair, all different lengths and styles.

The one thing they have in common, is no hair dye.

Yes, they do need the occasional haircut and styling, but why introduce dye to to young, healthy, shiny hair.?

PooPooInMyToes · 21/04/2012 23:37

Bella.

So your husbands hair costs around £225 a year?

Your boys (is that 35 all together for both of them?) hair costs £300

And yours is £430?

PooPooInMyToes · 21/04/2012 23:39

Sorry that's £260 for your husbands.

marriedinwhite · 22/04/2012 00:18

DS: Barber cut every 1/2 term and holiday - £15.00
DD: My hairdresser does a dry trim every holiday £15.00 (occasionally as a treat I let her have it washed and cut and blow dried (£30)
Me: Cut and blow dry every 8 weeks, half a head of highlights every other visit. Cut and BD is £45, Cut, BD and half head is £100.

Not that expensive for South West London.

DD is presently 13 (almost 14). She is a dark blonde and actually, I think I would let her have highlights at 16 if she really wanted them and I think I would fund it for her too. This would not have been my view when she was younger and it's funny how your views change as the dc get older.

Agree with all those who say mosschops and her daughter need to compromise. If it has to be a hair cut this weekend (had it happened?) then dd has to pay and mosschops gives her something towards it next month. The essence is I think that you have to cut your cloth.

sashh · 22/04/2012 04:13

She has money you don't. She wants a luxury so let her pay.

HateBeingCantDoUpMyJeans · 22/04/2012 04:18

Fab glad it's all worked out.

Just one thing, you do realise that you lose the right to object/ban any hair options if she is prepared to pay for it herself Grin

BellaVita · 22/04/2012 07:41

Poo £35 together for both boys. So about £1000 per year on hair.

Married, I think you are so correct about views changing as they get older.

redyam · 22/04/2012 07:51

Meh. I pay maximum £3. Take up hairdressing as a hobbie. They are becoming rip off merchants!

Mopswerver · 22/04/2012 07:57

Agree with all previous posters. YANBU. She is 16 now so not a child. She ought to be able to understand the financial situation. I would offer to pay a standard haircut amount (if she is willing to wait) and she should put the rest to it.

weevilswobble · 22/04/2012 07:59

I think YABU paying for her to have it coloured. You should pay for say 5 basic cuts a year and if she wants extras like colour then she can pay for that. If you give her birthday money she can decide how she spends it. At 16 you have to teach them that theres a finite amount of money and giving them money teaches them about decision making.

Mopswerver · 22/04/2012 08:03

Another thought...Do you give her pocket money? If so then IMO she should be paying herself. We have started this with our 11 & 9 yr olds. We pay them fairly generous pocket money but they buy their own things e.g they have just gone to a Fancy Dress Party and they bought their own costumes Blush. At this stage I still pay for their haircuts (£15 for the both of them!) but when the time comes for expensive "Do's", they will be paying. We are not doing them any favours by not teaching them to manage money so I think your dh is right.

Tw1gl3t · 22/04/2012 08:12

At that age, we did each others'. We all got quite good, and it only cost whatever we could afford from our pocket money/saturday jobs to get a box of something from boots if we were the adventurous type.

Do girls not do that anymore?

SoupDragon · 22/04/2012 08:19

Mine costs £80. The three children cost £80 together. Every 6 weeks. Add that up and then hoist your horrified judgy pants up, PooPooInMyToes. All this reverse snobbery of "Oh I only get my hair cut once every other leap year" is laughable.

warmandwooly · 22/04/2012 08:20

Find your nearest FE College with a training salon and take her there.

warmandwooly · 22/04/2012 08:21

..Oh and let her pay.

Theas18 · 22/04/2012 08:24

Super cuts hairdresser chain is ok and cheap ish. £12? Ds goes therer and me/ DDs have been.

My DDs are developing exepensive haircut tastes as theyve recently had them done on groupon / KGB deals ( cost £16-22 on the ones I found depending what was included). Pop your location into the websites and find some!

SunflowersSmile · 22/04/2012 08:30

Not read whole thread but £20 contribution from you and she can save for rest/ use her money from babysitting or whatever.
£75 far, far too much.

timetochangeagain · 22/04/2012 08:33

haircut - thats for parents, around here its £10 for a 2year old!

shushpenfold · 22/04/2012 08:39

Agree - pay for basic haircuts, don't pay for colouring....if she wants to she can buy a box!

fuzzpig · 22/04/2012 08:48

If you've been paying for something as a present/special occasion thing, you definitely can't switch to paying for it regularly. It'd send out a really bad message.

Agree you could pay for basic haircut though. If she turns her nose up at it then that's her lookout really.

FWIW I do the MN haircut and it works amazingly, I get a lot of compliments. I even did it on DD (4) the other week. I cut DH's and DS's too.

PooPooInMyToes · 22/04/2012 08:59

What IS this mn haircut!?

BoffinMum · 22/04/2012 09:03

If she wants money for this sort of thing, she needs to get a job, tbh.