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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To not give ds a drink?

314 replies

BonkeyMollocks · 18/04/2012 20:37

Ds (4) is currently shouting from his bed that he wants a drink.

He has been offered water twice, which he has refused because he wants juice.

Apparently he is thirsty and now he wants daddy because daddy is normally a soft touch. I have banned daddy from speaking to him or going in there, because it will end with dh giving him juice just to shut him up, therefore making him not listen to me in the future and he will do it every night.

I am in a really shitty mood anyway and its not helping but dh thinks I should just give him some juice.
I think we should sit it out and let him cry it out.

He also did the same thing last night, he went to sleep eventually after 2 hours :(
AIBU to ignore him?

OP posts:
curiositykitten · 18/04/2012 23:04

No, Cat, I think you're right. She needs to teach him a lesson. She should leave the (little) bastard. At the very least she needs to seek legal advice.

Just imagine, on a forum somewhere right now, your 4 year old son is being advised to seek legal advice over the evil bitch that wouldn't give him juice before bed :grin:

Original poster
BonkeyMollocks · 18/04/2012 23:05

I'll whip him if he does!!

OP posts:
MrsTerryPratchett · 18/04/2012 23:11

Surely the sensible thing is either to give juice right at the beginning (when you are first asked) or give it never (even after two hours of screaming). Surely giving in after half an hour is just teaching children that screaming works?

fluffypillow · 18/04/2012 23:13

Well done you curiousmama.

I have 3 children of different ages, and have never let them cry for 2 hrs, I just couldn't see a situation where that would need to happen. I'm not a 'lazy' parent at all, and my children do behave well, and understand right from wrong.

I just know through experience that as a parent you need to pick your battles, and refusing a drink of juice is petty, and not worth the fight imo.

CuriousMama · 18/04/2012 23:16

Well done to you then fluffypillow.

I'm sure it won't be 2 hours every night he's just got a shock that no one's given in this time?

louismummy · 18/04/2012 23:16

startail sugar free stil has sugar in! it has no added sugar, it has natural sugarsin it, so still has the potential to decay teeth.Grin

curiositykitten · 18/04/2012 23:18

Yeah, but it has no alcohol, which - let's face it - is what the little shits are really after!

CuriousMama · 18/04/2012 23:19

Oh and I challenge you to find any dentist in the land who'd recommend juice at bedtime?

WhaleOilBeefHookedIWill · 18/04/2012 23:19

Usual why do you always appear to be spoiling for a fight?

curiositykitten · 18/04/2012 23:20

Usual didn't get given juice at bedtime as a child. It's caused a whole lifetime of resentment and bitterness.

CuriousMama · 18/04/2012 23:20

Coke in a bottle is the way to go with whisky added a thimble full at a time? Wink Knocks the buggers spark out!

fluffypillow · 18/04/2012 23:21

Well, no, because he cried for 2hrs last night, so obviously didn't learn anything from that.

A calm chat today about what made him behave like that last night, and what the op could do to help him settle tonight may have been good parenting.

I don't believe in 'crying it out' at any age. There is no need for it.

Original poster
BonkeyMollocks · 18/04/2012 23:23

Fluffy We had 'the chat' today.

Tis all opinions. You do not have to agree, as does anyone else.

I think I'm going to try the coke and whisky trick next time!

OP posts:
fluffypillow · 18/04/2012 23:24

Op also stated she was in a 'shitty mood', so maybe taking it out on ds a little??

I'm sure listening to him crying and shouting didn't improve her mood.........so what was the point of making things worse?

WhaleOilBeefHookedIWill · 18/04/2012 23:27

When my DS is tired there is no talking to him or reasoning whatsoever and if he screamed for juice and got it I can guarantee he'd scream and strop for something else in his awkward overtired state. Can people really not see its not about the juice???

CuriousMama · 18/04/2012 23:28

I'm sure they tried to comfort him? Some dcs do cry and carry on a lot. You've been lucky perhaps fluffypillow and your dcs settled easily? It's still not right to give in to juice.

Anyway I'm off to bed. Good luck op.

Original poster
BonkeyMollocks · 18/04/2012 23:29

Op also stated she was in a 'shitty mood', so maybe taking it out on ds a little??

Fucking hell fluffy Biscuit

I am in a shitty mood due to other issues. I have not once shouted at my ds tonight however much I have wanted to. Not all of us take our bad moods out on our children.

OP posts:
CuriousMama · 18/04/2012 23:30

Whale exactly!!

Right I'm 'orf now.

fluffypillow · 18/04/2012 23:30

Well Whale, op obviously did think it was about the juice because she didn't want her Dh to give it to him to 'shut him up!'

Original poster
BonkeyMollocks · 18/04/2012 23:34

ITS NOT ABOUT THE FUCKING JUICE

I did not want dh to give him the juice because that would be a clear undermining of me!!!

OP posts:
WhaleOilBeefHookedIWill · 18/04/2012 23:34

No- she didn't want her DH to perpetuate his tantrums by giving in. I will say once more- IT'S NOT ABOUT THE JUICE

curiositykitten · 18/04/2012 23:34

She didn't want her DH to give in to the child's tantrum, not give him juice because she's evuuuul!

WhaleOilBeefHookedIWill · 18/04/2012 23:34

PMSL great minds

fluffypillow · 18/04/2012 23:35

If you read my post you will see I never said you shouted at him, why would I? I said you may have been taking your mood out on him a little. By this I meant because you wouldn't defuse the situation in the first place by giving the child some juice, or letting your dh go up and settle him.

Original poster
BonkeyMollocks · 18/04/2012 23:35

Grin Whale

OP posts:
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