To think that 14 miles in a car to school is ok?

[VeryTiredMummyOf2]

It seems a long way, but that's where the school is?

Any thoughts?

I can imagine our head kicking a year 6's bag if it wasn't where it should have been and he tripped over it. While simultaneously demanding someone's guts for garters. But that wouldn't put me off the school!

seeker it is very easy to look at schools and see what you want to see. It is also hard to view schools when you don't have experience of dcs actually at school. I had two pages of close-typed A4 questions for ds's new headmaster many of which wouldn't have even entered my head the first time I did school visits when ds was at nursery.

VeryTired - parking is a good point. Ds's current school has a large car park. His new school is in the town centre and has a drive in, drop off one way system so I'm wondering what happens if you need to get something out of the boot!

It's very easy to get swayed by the fab facilities that most private schools have. Ds's new school has the most amazing facilities (he is already at private school with great facilities so I wasn't prepared for my reaction at all). On our visit I spent most of my time saying 'wow' and found it quite hard to get a grip on the important stuff!

Ds school sn )is 30 miles each way berm doing since age 4

If going yourself you need to consider cost of petrol/diesel . If your child is I'll to as it seems take even longer

In the VIth form, I was at one of the few independent schools in Cornwall & several of my friends travelled 25 odd miles to school. Some of them had been doing that since the age of 5. The real downside was socialising at the weekend was a real pain as some of the people in our group lived 45 or so miles apart.

By fluke, a lot of my friends were the eldest child in the family & were given a car + driving lessons for their 17th birthdays with the pressure being on to pass their tests as soon as possible so they could them drive themselves and younger siblings to school. Whilst I could understand why the parents would want this, it did put a lot of pressure on them as they had to drive for over an hour each day on winding but busy roads when they were inexperienced. One friend & her two younger brothers ended up with pretty bad injuries after waking up late so driving too quickly to school - she ended up re-taking the lower sixth as she missed so much as a result of being in hospital.

Everlong you are right, private last resort.

We have been to the Indy 3 times due to assessments, we asked loads of ? even spoke to the dinner ladies and caretaker :)

I went to the state schools once and on my own, so for the state we have been allocated I'm taking dd and dh.

X

Everlong you know me so well :)

I travelled 15 miles each way in secondary and it was a ballache, tbh, quite apart from the private/ state issue.

It's such a shame this has turned into a private/state issue. It means that nobody can now say anything without others thinking they have an agenda. I sometimes do have an agenda- but in this thread I haven't.

What was the context of the bag kicking incident?

everlong

Yes hanging out (not 'about') with other kids at night is apart of growing up!

I don't mean hanging around streets glue sniffing at 12.

I mean teenage kids going out to the local cinema or parties (with strict curfews).

I would absolutely encourage it. It's called a social life.

Far better than living on Facebook.

We were walking through a corridor and there was a child's bag in the middle, instead of picking it up and putting it on the hook, he kicked it, just like a football to the side. It's just got to me and that's the thing that's sticks in my mind, he also said stuff like we have a high turnover of staff, most are v young and will leave to have babies
Another comment was that some parents want us to tell them what there child is doing weekly, but we don't have the time for this, any issues then to email him, however he is really busy?
I went through the ofstead report- what it failed on was leadership! Also lack of quality teaching.

I then spoke to some parents who have dd at this school, who have said you get a fantastic teacher one year and they learn so much, then you get a rubbish one who hasn't built on what has been learnt in the previous year etc.

Another mum said that she was sick of dd not doing any maths, reading etc, whenever she asked her dd what she did today at school all she got was we are learning lines for the play.

I like being creative and think plays are a good thing but not all the time.

Sorry for long post ;)

Oh dear that doesnt sound good !
I guess the way forward is to look at the school again ( although you have put me off !) with DH and DD .
Dont forget to consider the long term options - the years fly by!

Can you afford to fund private secondary ? If not I would seriously consider looking at your options for secondary now - if the three schools in your area are failing I would have a close look at what your catchment secondary is like .
I know schools change over time but its worth considering.
Good luck OP

It doesn't sound good. The bag kicking doesn't get me, but what he said does, wasn't he trying to "sell" the school to you?

So if you look at the school again, having presumably not shared your views with DD, and asking DH to try and keep an open mind..... then if you all feel the same at the end of it (or indeed if you feel differently), your decision is effectively made (the head sounds awful to me, and the fact that Ofsted seem to think he is too is doubly worrying - I wouldn't be too concerned about the comments from other parents).

The bag kicking might not bother me but the turn over of teachers, the "too busy" might. The "learning lines" thing wouldn't bother me-children always say this sort of thing - chances are she was doing it for 10 minute! But the Ofsted would worry me. When you say "failing" what do you mean? I would run a mile from a school with 4s for leadership and teaching. And I would think very carefully about a school with 3s in these areas.

Failing in leadership is just about the worst red flag a school could have ime. Everything hinges on leadership.

That is a reason to dismiss one school but not necessarily the other two. Also don't be misled into thinking that paying for a school automatically means good teachers.

From the OP's other threads, she is clearly looking at all options.

I don't think she wants to turn this into a state v private debate. I'm sure she knows there are good and bad schools in both sectors and good and bad teachers in both sectors and so on ad infinitum..........

if it was the local school because really rural there would be school bus, where i used to work in far north of scotland some kids travelled 80 miles on school bus every day ( that was secondary) when roads were worse 20-30 years ago most would have been weekly boarders at state expense,

my DD is 2 but she will get bus from when she starts school proimary 3 miles away secondary 9 miles but other kids will be travelling upto 25 miles one way

but that said 56 miles a day is a lot of petrol as you are rural it will probably be only 20-30 minutes time wise eaxch trip but that still adds up to 2 hours plus a day, is there a regular bus part of the way so you take them to bus and collect from bus?