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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To think this woman should pay more attention to her own appearance.

159 replies

lurkinginthebackground · 09/04/2012 00:32

Took my mum and 2 dds out to NT event for Easter.
It was cold and involved traipsing around a NT property, doing the Easter Egg Hunt, exploring the adventure playground for clues and then looking at the "gardens".
We didn't go into the stately home as it was £14 just to see the gardens plus £2 per child for the egg hunt.
Anyway "the gardens" turned out to be no more than very large fields with grass and the occassional set of trees.

We were all dressed in coats and flat shoes.
DD1, who is 15, pointed out a woman who had quite literally eyed her up and down starting at her feet, then worked her way up until she finally looked at dds hair and then pulled a not too happy face! dd2 verified that she actually did this!
My dd was wearing Pineapple shoes, baggy jeans, a rose coloured sweat top and a Superdry coat. Her hair was French plaited at the front then tied in a ponytail. She also had very subtle make up.
I tried to laugh it off and told her that the woman was probably admiring her.
She said no mum, she didn't do it in that way,
Anyway the woman looked ok from behind, albeit in a cardigan,Ugg style boots and NO COAT (shudders) but when she turned round had a face to turn the prettist of things into stone.
She looked very old to be a mother of the small child she was with (6,7ish).
I then told dd not to worry as she aws hardly any sort of fashionista.
Secretly I looked at this woman and thought "take a long hard look at yourself, you really are not in any position to throw stones are you?"

Not needing advice just cannot believe that a grown woman would do that to a child. Get a grip you silly cow.

OP posts:
squeakytoy · 09/04/2012 00:34

You sound rather judgemental yourself!

WorraLiberty · 09/04/2012 00:38

Fucking hell you sound more childish and judgemental than any teenager I've ever known!

So she looked your DD up and down?

Big deal

Just as you had your opinions on her, she may have had the opinion your DD looked like a chav.

What is the problem here since both you and this woman seem to have exactly the same manner about you?

DeepThought · 09/04/2012 00:39

meow OP

Salmotrutta · 09/04/2012 00:39

Goodness.

She looked very old to be a mother to a 6/7 year old did she?

And her face could turn the prettiest thing to stone?

People can sometimes misinterpret looks you know.

Maybe your daughter was mistaken - it happens.

I wouldn't worry about it any longer.

TheNightIsDarkAndFullOfTerrors · 09/04/2012 00:39

YAB "non-U" to say, "Stately Home"

Grin
lurkinginthebackground · 09/04/2012 00:39

I wouldn't have battered an eye normally, but as she had chosen to "eye up" my child I then did have a good look at her, yes and did judge her for doing so.
Boxing gloves were off then.

OP posts:
TheNightIsDarkAndFullOfTerrors · 09/04/2012 00:40

And you a BVVVU to blatantly not be asking an AIBU Shock

Goolash · 09/04/2012 00:41

Flats and UGG boots in this damp weather? Gosh! You're as bad as each other.

Must get back to lounging around in my big baggy pants.

celticlassie · 09/04/2012 00:41

Surely to God she wasn't judging a young girl on how she was dressed? Without knowing your DD it's hard to say, but when I was that age I could detect a slight in everything so so maybe it was nothing.

Salmotrutta · 09/04/2012 00:41

You have no idea what she how she really looked at your DD - you didn't see it.
Boxing gloves?

Are you quite a confrontational person OP?

TunipTheVegemal · 09/04/2012 00:42

That's one of the weirdest posts I've ever read on Mumsnet.

Why does it matter whether she was wearing a coat or not?
You think the woman should pay more attention to her own appearance because her face wasn't pretty enough for you? Are you suggesting she should have plastic surgery?
What has her age got to do with it? Are women not allowed to go out with young children? Do you have a problem with older women having children? Would it be ok if she was actually just the aunt or granny?

If you don't like the way someone looks at you, ignore it; you have no idea if you've interpreted it correctly.

TheNightIsDarkAndFullOfTerrors · 09/04/2012 00:42

"Battered an eyelid"

Carry on, OP Grin

WorraLiberty · 09/04/2012 00:42

Can you give us all the heads up when you're on the Jeremy Kyle show op?

I'd hate to miss it....

Salmotrutta · 09/04/2012 00:42

"What she how she" - for crying out loud!

You have no idea how she really looked at you DD is how that should read!!

DeepThought · 09/04/2012 00:42

I should hope that you wouldn't batter an eye normally

CrockoDuck · 09/04/2012 00:42

I think YABVU and a little childish to have a) given this whole thing even a second thought and b) to have brooded so much that you're still worrying about it now.

No idea why this woman looked at your daughter like that (if she did) but, seriously, who cares?

And your comments about her are spiteful, tbh.

TunipTheVegemal · 09/04/2012 00:43

and why were you wearing boxing gloves? This gets stranger and stranger.

Yellowtip · 09/04/2012 00:44

She was probably the granny.

Are you Sam Brick?

GilbertandGeorge · 09/04/2012 00:45

'Battered an eyelid'!!!

Grin
Salmotrutta · 09/04/2012 00:45

I do rather like the description of your DDs attire - although the labels mean absolutely nothing to me.

I wouldn't know a pineapple shoe if it bit me.

NiceHamione · 09/04/2012 00:46

What kind of grown woman refers to the label of the clothes your teenage daughter wears? You sound like a teenager.

LibrarianByDay · 09/04/2012 00:46

She looked very old to be the mother of a 6/7 year-old? Perhaps she was said child's grandmother?

Salmotrutta · 09/04/2012 00:46

Billy Connolly had a pair of banana shoes he used to wear on stage though ...

lurkinginthebackground · 09/04/2012 00:47

Just found it odd why a grown woman would look a child up and down in that way and then pull a face. Maybe she is someone who has a naturally downcast sort of face, I'll accept that as a possible. The reason I mentioned her clothes was that it was very cold and most people there were wearing waliking shoes, trainers, boots (practical kind) and some sort of coat. So no reason to look at a girl in a coat and flat shoes.

OP posts:
Salmotrutta · 09/04/2012 00:48

Oooh, Oooh - Sharon isn't going to turn up with the dead wasp is she?
And the Christmas meat?