to go mad at this dad who is about to drop my daughter off - need quick responces

[batsaboutbats]

My dd best friend at school has the 2 slackest parents NEVER see the mother not even sports day etc and the dad is ok.
Anyway I do alot of running around with best friend and really go out of my way taking her to activities etc (really for the girls sake not for the parents!)
Anyway I just found out a couple of days ago from dd that when the dad recently took both girls to the cinema he just left them - they are 7!!
I told my DH to deal with it (they are sort of friends/aqaintences)
Anyway both dads just dropped girls at brownies and dh spoke to the dad who said he waited outside and read his book but was there.
I am not sure this is true but even if it is I think really he should be in the actual cinema with them as you never know who's about?
AIBU??
now the dad is heading over with my dd from brownies so what shall I say to him?
Knew my bloody dh would cock it up!!

I think he should have OKed this with you yes, it's a bit late to go MAD about it now but I would mention to him that you would prefer if it didn't happen again.

I wouldn't be happy about it but I would have checked plans with him before, especially as it seems you already knew they have a different parenting style to you.

I wouldn't kick up a fuss, it's been discussed and you will know next time to not allow him to take her out unless your sure it's supervised as you would like

omg a mum not at sports day phone SS quick.

Just say "look - about the cinema. Not to drag it up again but leaving them in the auditorium unsupervised is not OK for me. Everyone's different but I wouldn't want that to happen again"

Try to say it lightly.

They sound perfectly normal to me. I think if I had to sit through Alvin And The Chipmunks 3 again, I would probably leave my kids with all the peedos our cinemas are surely infested with too.

at ABatInBunkFive

I think the father should have sat with them

I wouldnt say anything until next time your DD is in their care and I would say ' Look, I am not really comfortable with what happened at cinema, woudl appreciate it if you could ensure they are always in sight'

LeBOF - fully agree!

christ alive do we not allow our 7 year olds out of sight now?

thanks yes you are right i'll just keep it light.
I only didn't check if he was staying with them because I thought no one would leave 2 x 7 year olds alone in a cinema I would think parents would start doing that about age 10 or 11??
maybe I am very PFB 7 years later ;0)

Ummmmm.

What's wrong with doing that?

fucking hate Sports bloody Day too

Why do you never see the mother, out of interest? Is she working or looking after other children?

I'm impressed he even took them to the cinema seeing that they are all slack n that

I missed sports day last year too.

Am I a slack mother then?

I think posters are being a bit harsh! I wouldn't be happy with my 7 year old dd being left at a cinema either - however irrational that is. My 10 year old - fine.

It's done. I wouldn't have done it, except if the film was Alvin and the bloody chipmunks but there is no point losing your temper with him - just tell him you are not comfortable, and next time check the exact plans.

ABat No I wouldnt leave them in the cinema. I would think that is quite odd. Two 7 year olds and no supervising adult is a bit much for me.
LeBof I dont think 'peados' are the issue, its all the various other things two 7 year olds can get up to in a strange place with no supervision. Its not the same as leaving them in the front room with a DVD.

Two 7 year olds in a cinema with people are not easily taken away.

I don't think I'd normally do it, but it doesn't seem that wrong.

I just don't see how the mum not going to sports day has anything to do with the dad leaving them in the cinema tbh

And if you know they're "slack" compared to you, then did you not think to check the details? You must know they're more relaxed than you to be able to say that.

It's not about them being 'taken away' Lueji!

My 7 year old is feisty and confident but she still sometimes gets upset or afraid of silly little things in films, or the dark etc.

I agree with others, there's no need to go bezonkers with him - we all have different parenting styles, some think it's okay to do that others don't. Personally I would have stayed with them I like a good kiddies movie even if it was those pesky chipmonks.

Just tell him you wouldn't have left them alone and since he now knows that would he please just run something like that past you first next time.

Its not them being "taken away" that would worry me, more what they would get up to. Even the best behaved 7 year olds would be tempted to do all sorts I would imagine!

Yabu unreasonable about the mum until I went on mat leave for ds I was unable to attend school activities for dd as work was not flexible. I felt very guilty and judged by other mums.

Yanbu about the cinema, they should have checked it was ok with you as everyone has different ideas on what they allow their kids to do on there own. I bet your dd loved the independence though! My dd is always asking to be able to do stuff like this, I sit a few rows behind her at the pics if we take a friend.

Well there is no way I'd leave two 7yr olds in the cinema alone. Dd 12 now and we started around 10/11. Same with all the other parents of her friends. It's not about potential abusers lurking about at all. For one thing Dd threw up in the cinema once, how do 2 7yr olds handle that sort of thing on their own for 2 hours?