CATS: Just a bit shit aren't they?

[Tortington]

Almost any other domesticated animal is better

Cats are lovely, but unsustainable. You either have to have a stinky litter tray inside or let them out to poo in the neighbours gardens and kill birds. If I had a house with a large terrace where the cat could get some fresh air and I could have the litter tray where it wouldn't stink out the house, I'd have one.

Dogs are more manageable; they don't kill birds and you can keep an eye on where they poo!

My cats are thick as pig muck & would probably move to a house with nicer food in a heartbeat. They never sit with me.
I love their tails, though. So incredibly expressive, you can tell 90% of what a cat is thinking from what its tail is doing.

Quite agree, helpyourself. That would be my garden .

cats are fab

My cats are all kinds of awesome.

Yours are shit though :o

Mine provide countless minutes of entertainment value before they conk out and sleep in the patches of sun that stream through the windows.

You cats chose you Pinot. Wise cats.

Your cats, even.

Another cat person here - wouldn't be without the cat who adopted us and has deigned to move in and let us look after his every need.

Cats don't need to learn things - mine tries to teach me to hunt by bringing me nearly dead things and then demonstrates how to finish them off and eat them.

Sparkling :o They're a year old next month! :o April 17th! Ker-azy innit.

Cat hair on absolutley everything in the house.
Random regurgitation of hairballs, mouseparts etc wherever they like.
Repeated shredding of furniture, carpets whilst sharpening claws.
Depositing of dead animals or half eaten animal parts in random places.
Occasional live (not quite dead) animal left for your to deal with - last one was a mouse which ran into an inaccessible gap behind the fireplace to die and then decomposed over a number of weeks.
Foulness that is litter tray and permeating stink of recent crap that takes hours to disperse.
Then when elderly and senile, the constant meowing day and night that drives you to distraction.

I love cats, but I'm never having another one. Until I had kids I never realised how dirty they are!

Three down, one to go.

Cats are terrific. They fill that masochistic space in my life that yearns for a good-looking bastard to stomp through at will, taking what it wants and then bogging off again. Thus enabling me, at my advanced age, to live a fairly sane and balanced life with a nice bloke who actively wants to be nice to me

(We have three cats. Perhaps I should claim their upkeep as Essential Mental Wellbeing Maintenance.)

MI

I played one of ds's cats favourite games this morning. It's called changing the sheets. He thinks this is great - somehow he knows and is ready for me, hiding under ds's bed without making a sound, then as I go to tuck the sheets in on the side against the wall, these claws pop up to get me.

Then he likes to jump on the bed while I'm trying to put the duvet cover on. With the double bed, he likes to jump on it while I'm taking the old sheet off, while I'm putting the new sheet on, basically every opportunity throughout the whole procedure, and grab me if I try to shift him.

So you are coming up to your first MNiverary, Pinot?

My cat is also awesome. He casts a great shape when sharpening his claws on the carpet. We made up a game many tears age (got him with an ex, I moved out. Said ex then got married / babied and they asked me to have him) and he can still remember the game, which is for him to hare about the place when I first get home from work, and eventually crouch on the floor wagging his tail until I pick him up and cuddle him on my shoulder. I think he was removed from his mummy too quickly, as when he is drinking from the bathroom tap, he likes me to hold on to him and even kiss his face when he is drinking. We are very close. He likes kissing in the mornings, has grown used to the hoover, to share my food no matter what, and loves all friends and parties. Wish I'd had him when he was young.

Ooh I love bad tempered evil cats. One of mine is, I love winding her up. My other is a gentle wimp that is nice and calm.

I love cats for their personalities and the fact that they own you if they want to not the other way round.

I also own 3 dogs, for the opposite reasons to owning a cat

Agree completely. Can't abide the bastards.

YAB ridiculously U!

Totally agree OP. Cats are useless. They can't do anything useful like rescue people, guide blind people, orfetch and carry. Not because they are too independent as many cat owners claim, but because they are too thick.

Its not actually that difficult to teach a cat to obey simple commands for instance. But they are usually too thick to teach them anything beyond very basic commands.

"But they are usually too thick to teach them anything beyond very basic commands."

They're not thick, they just don't see the point and mostly can't be arsed!

They most defiantly aren't thick. I've had 4 dogs! Now they were thick!

Yes dogs can be thick I agree. But some breeds are more intelligent and can be trained to do useful stuff - my proof that dogs can be fairly intelligenct. Cat owners can never give any actual proof as to why cats are intelligent. Frankly I think cat owners who think their cats are intelligent are like parents of pfb who think their week old baby is a genius.

See I'm convinced they're thick, but that they look clever...that sitting watching you with their eyes half closed, it makes them look intelligent, but they're not.

They haven't worked out that if they lie on the couch as you're sitting down they'll get squashed, nor that standing behind you when yore cooking or walking in front if you gets them stood on. They can't find elastic bands if you put them on your wrist, even though they watched you do it.

Don't get me wrong, I like them, I just don't think they're that bright and they're mostly too independant to be good companions.

But they're very decorative and they are easier to look after than dogs.

Nutty I joined in Jan 11. I've popped my MNiversary :)