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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To be perturbed that a woman felt compelled to come into a coffee shop today with the sole purpose of telling my 9 year old son ...

161 replies

QuintessentialyHollow · 19/03/2012 21:57

"You will become fat" with an evil grin.

Confused

After his terrible migraine attack last weekend, we had an optical appointment today, so I took him out from school quarter past two. He was really worried about the appointment, and the optician was very thorough. It took half an hour. We went to a coffee shop for a snack, as we then had a 30 minute walk up to his tutor, where he was going to do one more hour of learning. It is important that he eats on regular intervals. He is skinny as a rake, and usually eats little and often.

So, we shared a ham and cheese panini, he had a rasberry water, and a chocolate muffin. We were sitting on bar stools, looking out the window, eating. By then it was 3 pm, and he had not eaten since lunch time at 12, dinner would be at 6pm.

So, a woman was looking at him from the bus stop outside. She suddenly opened up the door, came in and said something to him. He did not respond, and she left. I asked my son, "what did she say to you?"

"You will become fat"

How on earth can a total stranger make such a comment to a child? Angry

OP posts:
thebody · 19/03/2012 22:18

There are some horrible people out there op, obviously she is one, or stupid, and people like trois just want to hurt you. Ignore the silly bitches, must have very bad lives to post like this.

Rita my 12 year old dd eats very little so your post is stupid as well.

Remember op greedy well fed toddlers become greedy fat teens( 22 years experience as mum of 4 slim kids)

Hope your son and u just ignore

Birdsgottafly · 19/03/2012 22:22

She looked perfectly normal, she was really strange,she was a weirdo freak.

I can imagine the reaction if similar language was used towards the physically disabled.

Could you have not just explained Mental Health conditions in an age appropriate language, so he realised that it was not his fault or caused by his actions? It is important for children to know how to protect themselves, by knowing how to behave, eg ignore, strange behavour,if they are out on their own.

I think that we should count ourselves lucky if we have good mental health, rather than victimise those that haven't.

Original poster
QuintessentialyHollow · 19/03/2012 22:23

Yes, it has been a busy week, troisgarcon, I also have cellulitis in a pierced ear, and have had my meds upped twice this week, just to make everything more exciting. Are you actually drunk?

And I do in fact meet him at the school gates with a snack every Monday. Pfb? Maybe, but he is hungry, and I want him to have eaten something before his tutorial. He is far behind in numeracy and literacy due to us having been overseas for three years, and he has jumped form y4 to y5.

To be honest, I did not actually think that she has mental health problems, only that she was seriously obsessed with his muffin.

There were lots of kids from the local secondary hanging around the bus stop, eating burgers from the local fast food joint. Maybe this spurred her on.

OP posts:
Pagwatch · 19/03/2012 22:23

Is it better to cope with dissent from those you like. Or be supported in a slightly shouty and incoherent way?

lockets · 19/03/2012 22:24

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

thebody · 19/03/2012 22:26

Ignore them op, you sound a great mum and who knows if she was mad or bad? Best forget it, hope u both feel better soon.

Vicky2011 · 19/03/2012 22:27

Or the lady was Trois???

Original poster
QuintessentialyHollow · 19/03/2012 22:27

What are you on about Birdsgottafly?

"I told him that some people are really rude, and what he was eating is not anybody's business, and that she was really strange."

I spoke to him in Norwegian, but that was pretty much the gist of it, but rather that her behavior was a bit strange.

OP posts:
Birdsgottafly · 19/03/2012 22:29

OP actually jokes aside, muffins may be her trigger, it isn't uncommon to have certain items as triggers with some MH conditions.

Original poster
QuintessentialyHollow · 19/03/2012 22:30

This site is becoming laughable.

Never imagined I would become the villain in this scenario.

OP posts:
Original poster
QuintessentialyHollow · 19/03/2012 22:31

OMG! The world is spinning. It seems everything I say have a double meaning that not even I am aware of!

OP posts:
RitaMorgan · 19/03/2012 22:31

Don't know why you're having a go at me thebody for just agreeing with the OP. What a nasty post Confused

lockets · 19/03/2012 22:31

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Beamur · 19/03/2012 22:32

Vicky most unMN, but lol.

EchoBitch · 19/03/2012 22:33

Hmmm,muffins are a trigger? Grin

Ignore them Quintessential...i hope you both enjoyed your muffins.

Birdsgottafly · 19/03/2012 22:33

Quint- that post wasn't just at you, but the language used towards people with possible MH conditions, would be instantly jumped on if used towards the physically disabled on MN.

Are people who shake with parkinsons "strange", or slur their words because of epilepsy? Why are people with MH conditionsthus described if they behave in a certain way?

People with MH conditions, are just that and could be anyone of us.

Pagwatch · 19/03/2012 22:33

You aren't the villain Quint Smile

I just think it is pretty obvious she had some issues. But no harm done, surely.

TheOriginalNutcracker · 19/03/2012 22:34

I'd have been fuming, and tbh my ds is a bit fat. She had no right to make any comment to your child.

Is your ds getting any help with his migraines ?? My ds has been on pizotifen now for about 8 weeks and after upping the dose once, he has improved.

QuietNinjaTattoo · 19/03/2012 22:35

Thebody you tell op to ignore the silly bitches who are insulting her and you then go on to insult ritamorgams post. Nice Hmm
Op there are some strange people out there who do things for reasons we will probably never know. so long as your son is ok and didn't feel threatened then don't worry. Fwiw what he was eating sounds fine as a "keep him going to tea time" snack imho.

Original poster
QuintessentialyHollow · 19/03/2012 22:35

Clearly I am an idiot.

I am wrong to take my son to gp after sight disturbances and let him be seen by an optician, all in the space of one week.

I am wrong to feed my child a "meal" in the 30 minutes we have spare, sitting in a warm coffee shop rather than wandering the streets aimlessly.

There are jibes about feeding snack at school gates, and tutoring.

I am accused of calling people freaks and weirdos just because I tell my child that some people behave strange.

Next I am joking about mental health because I mention the word "Trigger".

You lot are really something.

OP posts:
ABigGirlDoneItAndRanAway · 19/03/2012 22:35

She may have been mentally ill, on the other hand she may have just been nosy and rude. Either way I wouldn't give her any more thought, if the former you are not likely to see her again so there's nothing you can do about it and if the latter she doesn't deserve a second thought, you know that you are feeding your son the way he needs to be fed with occasional treats added in so don't dwell on it.

EchoBitch · 19/03/2012 22:36

BirdsGottaFly

Random butter inners are strange...fact.

edam · 19/03/2012 22:37

The original conversation was weird enough, but troisgarcon's contribution is even odder... maybe it's just your day for attracting weirdos, quint, IRL and here as well!

EchoBitch · 19/03/2012 22:38

Yep,nosey,rude,interferring.....

All just strange.

TheSecondComing · 19/03/2012 22:38

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

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