To ask the nursery about grace?

[Stangirl]

My DD (2) attends a nursery 2 days a week - since last October. I am very happy with the nursery and love the way the staff are with the kids. DD seems very happy there.

They just had a Mother's Afternoon where the mums were invited in to attend a music and movement session, facepainting, playing, tea with the kids. I went along and it was lovely apart for one thing - one of the children was asked to say grace before the sandwiches and said a few words thanking god. I was shocked by this as I had believed them to be non-religious - teaching and celebrating all festivals etc but not active worshipping. As an avowed atheist I am quite perturbed.

Would you ask them if this is usual and if they are teaching them grace?

I was shocked by this as I had believed them to be non-religious - teaching and celebrating all festivals etc but not active worshipping

Could grace not just be seen as celebrating the food, good crops/harvest etc rather than active worshipping

Did you ask when looking around the nursery did they say Grace at meal times or do any other acts of worship?

If it is that important to you and you didn't ask then you cant really complain that they are saying Grace. If it bothers you that much then you can ask that your child doesn;t take part but why would you want to seperate her from her friends when she is not going to turn into a devout christain at the age of 2 by saying Grace.

But you wish there to be no grace said at all, therefore what about those parents (not me necessarily) who wish grace to continue?
Oh and I'm very much on the fence so there's no need to be so rude, I am asking an honest question.

Rubbish. Absolute tosh.
Famous tolerance and warmth my arse, there is none for the non-religious. And such self serving arrogance to assume its your religion that makes people nice? You know other religions and those with none can be nice people too?

I'm not afraid of anything, but I think people would find it irritating if the nursery sang songs or said rhymes telling every child there is no god. Why can't we just ensure what we do in all the things our children attend allows everyone to develop in their own way and respect or rebel against the views of their family as they develop? It is not hard........ I would no more tell people they are wrong in their beliefs than I would force mine upon them. I expect the same respect that's all.
I think the Irish government coined the phrase "parity of esteem" and that seems as good a way as any to explain the ethos.

Where did I say I wished there to be no grace said at all? I didn't, you just assumed. tut tut.

I find your anger quite disturbing Gilgamesh perhaps you have had bad experiences. I think you will find that those attributes do come from a history of faith in this country. Human beings are not naturally blessed with caring natures are we?

A question for OP. Before you sent her did you ask specific questions about religion or did you just assume? Far too many people make assumptions.

Oh blimey - I pop off to unload the food delivery and all hell breaks loose.

I've got to pick up DD from nursery now and have decided I will mention it to her key worker - I like the idea of suggesting a change of wording. I won't be asking DD to be removed from saying grace if it turns out they do it all the time as I don't want her to feel excluded. I might ask them to show the kids Star Wars to show them where I learnt my moral code from though.....

Lastly - to the poster who asked whether I celebrate Christmas - yes, of course I do! The focus is very much on tinsel and being nice to one another in our house though -rather than the birth of a historical person. As Dawkins says "Happy Christmas! Or as we atheists say, Happy Christmas!".

Em we are.. co-operative living existed long before organised religion ( unless you are a creationist, in which case I respect your right to tell me thats c**p

I think you will find thats just guff that christians like to assume in order to make them feel superior and justify their forcing their religion on everyone else actually.
The slightest application of logic shows the error of your thinking, not to mention the arrogance of your self assured superiority.

And how sad you have such a low opinion of humans, needing them to be controlled by organised religion.

Love that stan may the force remain with you

Sorry Gilgamesh I have been pretty neutral and asked simple honest questions and made it clear I am firmly on the fence on this issu yet I find your responses to me rude and patronising "tut tut". Blimey is there a need, I have been polite and honest to you shame you chose not to respond in kind.

I hope you somehow manage to come to terms with your hostility Gilgamesh

Perhaps you might like to visit a church sometime and see for yourself that the people there are not monsters

"arrogance" "self assured superiority"
Pot kettle black

perhaps resolve, rather than come to terms with, which would imply an acceptance, which would be damaging.

exoticfruits Just before I go to nursery..... I didn't ask. I just assumed that as the nursery served all members of the community - very multi-cultural/multi-creed where I live - there would be no specific worshipping so as not to exclude any religion/belief/non-belief.

Rubbish. Absolute tosh.
Famous tolerance and warmth my arse, there is none for the non-religious.

So do people hold a gun to your head and make you pray?

This country with it's 'tolerance and warmth' gives you the choice. The choice to believe or not believe, pray or not pray. There are countries out there where you would not get the choice.

We're not perfect but we're not that bad either!

And again for the record I'm reading this thread with neutral interest.

The moral of the story-for other people-is always, always ask.

OP - you were there to celebrate Mothering Sunday, a Christian festival. The fact that Hallmark make a lot of money out of it doesn't make it any less of a Christian event which you are happy for the nursery to celebrate and you will, no doubt, join in with this weekend. If you're going to raise your DD as an athiest, you really should put your money where your mouth is and stop doing the 'fun' bits of Christianity and only objecting to the more 'duty' side of it.

If you come across someone you like in your life Gilgamesh, and it turns out they're a christian, does your religious intolerance shine through to them?

You talk about 'the arrogance of your self assured superiority', but yours are the most arrogant posts on here.

You talk about 'how sad it is to have such a low opinion of humans' while showing the lowest opinion of certain humans on here.

Talk about hypocritical.

LydiaWickham exactly!

Even ask if you think you know the answer.

I am surprised with a nursery(I didn't think they would-, but I get very surprised that parents of 5yrs old think that England has any secular state schools.

A lot of people get angry because children can be subjected to prayers or religion. They're not being brainwashed! As other posters have said, children have enquiring minds and will eventually question this stuff anyway.

I was brought up as a Catholic, I attended a Catholic School. I don't go to mass anymore, I DO believe in sex before marriage and I DO believe in same sex marriage, living together, taking contraception etc. I learnt you can question parts of your faith. Having a faith is not black and white. If someone is a Christian it doesn't automatically mean they are against gay couples, abortion etc.