to not want strangers to keep touching DS without permission?

[Fruitflieslikeabanana]

OK this may turn into a rant

Why is it some people feel the need to touch / stroke / pinch the cheeks of my 10 month old DS? I've just taken him to the GP (D and V for several days but thankfully resolving today) and as I know he is probably contagious I sat as far away as possible from others and kept him sat on my knee. He's doing a lot of babbling at the moment so sat there making bits of noise and blowing a few raspberries which lead not one but two people to come over and put their hands on his face and coo at him.

I'm not particularly confrontational so I don't like just telling people to just go away or snatch DS away. AIBU to expect people not to do this to a child they do not know? It used to happen a lot when he was a small baby but I thought it would stop now he's bigger.

I don't have any problem with people making facing or interacting with DS it's just when they come over and paw at him, especially when he is sitting on my knee.

Maybe I just don't get it as I have never ever felt the urge to go over to anothers child and do that. This may well be odd, I'll add it to my list of odd traits.

Just be thankful you have a heathy baby you can take to the shops etc and get used to the fact you are part of society not in an isolated bubble

A baby is learning communication. It is starting to look at faces, see expressions, understand about non verbal communication. They are starting to get that when you smile it is good, when you frown it isn't.

A child who smiles at the world and has smiling engaged people reaching towards them is learning really good things developmentally.

Fucking with that is not helping your child.

YABU - babies arn't babies for very long. You'll realize this in another 12 months time and theres just something about babies that make people go all gooey.

Surely a polite society is also one that respects personal space and boundaries.

I have never met a baby who was remotely interested in polite society! If their personal space is invaded they will let you know if they don't like it!

fruitflies - When ever I interact with a baby i always have an urge to touch them. I don't get this with any other age group. It would feel really strange to talk to a baby and not touch at all. If I sensed a mother was like this, I just wouldn't bother interacting at all tbh. Life is too short.

I wouldn't bother if the mother is going to be all uptight!

Its natural to coo over babies its the babbiling and huge eyes the people were probably not pawing your baby just taking an interest its good for your baby to interact with people , people dont mean anyharm , next time they do it snatch your baby away or put your hand infront of theirs , they will tut but back off ,

@ worras can i touch your baby

I have two gorgeous, cute DGCs. (biased, much?)
One will respond happily to all smiling attention from strangers, the other screams the place down or (if you're lucky), scowls.

They're quite capable of deciding for themselves.

YANBU, I used to hate that when DS was young, even when I was pregnant I'd have strangers touching my bump

These sort of threads make me feel . What a lonely cold world we'd live in if everyone felt like you OP. It used to make me happy knowing when my DCs were at that squidgy stage that they made other people happy, just a smile or a stroke of a chubby cheek. Who can resist a baby. Yabu.

I had a moment when DS was a few months old when an eldery couple got talking to me in the library coffee shop. She was slightly disabled so obviously didn't have the same physicality that her DH did. He asked if he could have a cuddle. For a second I was slightly uncomfortable, then I slapped myself around the face (metaphorically) and handed DS over. The man then let his wife have a cuddle, with him supporting DS, and jigged him on his knee while I sat there and drank my coffee. DS clearly enjoyed it and so did the couple he was cuddling. I am glad I got past my first instinctive negative reaction re a stranger holding him.

[Now I sling DS at anyone who will take him for a minute and am grateful! ]

I laughed at the scowling grandbabies nannyogg my daughter was a scowler and she would soon let people know if they were in her space she just gave them a look, a baby will cry if it doesnt like being cooed over ,

I do quite enjoy the
'why do people touch my child ' posts though.
You just then have to wait about 18 months for
'my lovely toddler waved at an old bag in the supermarket today and she just glared back at him'

Of course she did! You went dipshit batty at her when she grabbed his hand 18 months ago. She has a great memory for nutters.

It must also be quite strange for the babies of over protective non touchy touchy parents, not to fully interact with other adults in a sociable way....and then when ML is over...popped off at Nursery or a CM.

Surely physical interaction under the watchful eye of a parent is a good thing for kids?

How sad that people get offended by others finding enjoyment in a little chubby cheek or a cute little baby.

YABU

It's instinctive because babies and young children communicate partly through touch, so we adapt to that and touch them to communicate.

It's age old. Like it, don't like it, but dot be surprised by it. You can put a stop to it if you wish. Just as others can think it a sad and sterile reaction.

You need to tell people to stop if you don't want them to touch your child.
And it is quite likely to offend.
But, your child, your perogative.

You are however clearly being unreasonable to expect people to guess that you don't want them to touch your child but I'm sure you have worked that one out from experience before you posted here!

Worra, I agree.
I get a bit hot under the collar about these threads. Babies, small children and children need physical contact and touch and non verbal communication. It is good for them.

OP - are you British?

I bet you are.

Don't for god's sake take your dc to India or any eastern country for a holiday. Because they don't just touch a baby's hand or face there - they tend to take them off you, cuddle them, pinch their cheeks, kiss them.

imagine

I may start a "Touch A Toddler Today" Campaign Pagwatch

Though I fear it may get all the wrong sort of publicity

Certainly I can foresee a few potential google problems Worra

Don't take your baby on the number 1 bus in Reading. The old ladies take the babies off me and pinch his cheeks and feed him chocolate for the entire journey!

Must say rather than scream 'PEDO GET THE FUCK OFF MY PRECIOUS' I tend to have a nap

Howling at "Touch a Toddler Today"

And imagining Worra getting chased down the road by ex-NOWT readers brandishing burning pitch forks