To really like the book "French Children Don't throw food"

[catgirl1976]

I am sure some of them do and the title is a bit (like French Women Don't Get Fat - I am sure lots do) - and I find the author annoying and think I would dislike her IRL, and I think the "French" attitude to BF is not righ......but these issues aside..........

I've just read this and I loved it. DS is 15 weeks now and I wish I had read it before he was born as I think I would have handled his sleep / waking differently.

He does sit nicely in restaurants though (smug).

It has got rid of my guilt about the fact I will be going back to work in 3 weeks and putting him in nursery and the fact that I combination feed. I love this book :)

It seems like relaxed, common sense, sensible parenting to me

Another vote for Angry Birds too,Highlander ;)

wordfactory and dreaming, this is something that concerns me as I'm pregnant with DC1 and whenever I mention things I am interested in, things I hope to do while I'm off work, some other women (and it tends to be those from my mum's generation, actually, act as if I've just made the most ridiculous assertion that, you know, I might have the time to continue with my own interests. So much "Well, you'll have your hands full, won't you?" and smug smiles as if they know better. Of course I know my life will change, but I don't feel that writing a blog post or gardening or seeing a friend for coffee is going to be out of the question! I don't know if it's a generational thing or what.

Sure Highlander, that's what the pediatrician told me on our first visit, 'If he won't eat his petit pois, beat the crap out of him'

FWIW I saw plenty of kids getting smacked in London, have yet to see it happen here in France. I think in both countries, some people do, some don't. Either way no one advocates full-on beatdowns, come on.

Parenting books are already a mass of generalisations (and boring common sense), if we throw in also a couple of simplifications about nationalities we are doomed !

Having said that, I have to admit that I once boarded a Milan-Paris TGV and once I got to Paris I realised that I had been sitting among lots of French children for hrs without having realised they were there. They had been extremely quiet. Vive La France

The Dutch just drug them. They'll get revenge whe we're old and have us euthanised.

Ballroom - remember that in the older generations fathers did little or nothing with their children, so mothers really were on call 24/7. As long as you have a supportive partner, or plenty of family help then it totally is possible to pursue your own interests and have a life outside your children. I used to be in a choir and I remember some of the older members being surprised when I went back when DS was about 8 weeks. A few of them asked me "Who has DS?" and were actually surprised when I said DH. One commented "Oh he's very good to babysit for you," which sums up the attitude pretty clearly I think.

Totally agree with Cailin. DH here has been nothing but supportive. He was the one who put them down for bed at 2 months on the nose and they slept through whilst I went out with friends

wordfactory - absolutely, and in between lunch and afternoon pick-up I walk to my local food market street and shop for fresh fish, fruit, vegetables, cheese etc, all at different shops which require all sorts of social interactions in order to maintain good relationships with my suppliers . It is all deeply antiquated.

Alice our version of 'pick your battles' has meant we do shorter stops in cafes, for hot chocolate and a snack, rather than full-on restaurant meals.

At around 14 months DS changed overnight from a baby who would sit in restaurants for a couple hours placidly to a super-curious toddler who was good for maybe 15 minutes. So tbh we just stopped with the restaurants for a while.

Then around 18 months, again practically overnight, he suddenly became very serious about eating and food and wanting to behave properly. So we started going to cafes. Now he's almost 2 and behaving so nicely we'll probably start going to restaurants again.

There's nothing wrong with skipping restaurants for a while. I think part of the 'secret' of well-behaved children is not taking them to things they're not ready for.

I walked to the Champs-Elysées yesterday morning after yesterday's drop off and spent my self-allocated sponsorship money on Marni for H&M (details in S&B)

Fuck a duck Bonsoir you must be knackered!
That's a huge part of your day gone.

I have to say that I admire you Bonsoir for doing lunches too. If I had to feed ds also at lunch we'd go bankrupt . I am dreading the start of middle school when he'll be back for lunch, and his appetite might be even more voracious than it is now...

Glitter, I had the exact same experience

Ballroom, don't worry, unless you are very unlucky you can do all those things! Sounds like you'll have a great ML.

Crossed.
Aha - was there anyhting worth having?

I saw some of it on Grazia website and was a bit hmmm. But then I don't like Marni on me anway. I think it's suits a straight up and down figure better than my va-va voom .

Ballroom I found when I had the babies (twins) that I did have my hands full. However, I was in the house far more than I'd ever been before. I'm not one for housework, so there were more hours available in some ways.

That';s when I started writing.

I do like the Marni but I'm a bit, er, va-va-voom myself

Shopping for clothes in France has been a total nightmare so far!

I'm the wrong shape :(

Not so keen on the Marni going off the ad - what's it like IRL?

I once bought one of their unstructured jackets in a kind of soft jersey and every time I wore the thing, it fell open exposing one boob. And people couldn't take their eyes off it, because there it was pointing at them. And I would tug the jacket together, but in seconds the boob would peep out again like a cheeky toddler.

That made me laugh, sorry!

Ha. I read this book and kind of enjoyed it at the time but, on reflection, I think it was a pile of shite. For example, the whole thing about the "pause" is bull; at one point it gives the example of a mother who "pauses" for 10 minutes. To me 10 minutes = CC. Nothing wrong with that per se - although I'm not really a fan of CC - I just prefer a spade to be called a spade is all.

FWIW, my 3yo has always behaved brilliantly in restaurants. He's a little fucker at the dinner table at home though so I can't claim that I've done anything right. I think it's just that he's a snobby little sod.

I love the posts a few pages back about Irish parenting. So true. I think its because Irish families were pretty big up until recently, and are still a little bigger than here (three kids rather than two). No one had time to be PFB because there was generally another one along in a year or two . My family would piss themselves laughing if I started banging on about 'birth experiences' and 'parenting philosophies'. Though to be fair most UK parents are more laid back than the ones you come across online. Most of the ones I know in real life wouldn't know what attachment parenting was if it bit them on the arse.

:) ha ha brilliant.

I would have assumed everyone was pointing at my fab new jacket and spent the day feeling smug and happy before finally realising about the boob.

I walked up and down the South Bank in the summer for about an hour with my skirt tucked into my knickers before some kindly lady told me. I was eight month pregnant and my arse was enourmous. People must have been gouging their eyes out behind me :(

I'm irish and have brought my kids up in the UK. Am pretty selfish, always had my own life ( did SAHM mum bit for the preschool years ). Am fairly strict though, and find when we go to Ireland my children are in general MUCH better behaved than the Irish kids we know. Too much benign neglect according to DH ie the Irish kids allowed to play out past midnight, unlimited screens etc.

somewhere - I totally agree that IRL parents are more relaxed than on here.

In fact, if I hadn't joined MN, I doubt I would have had a seconds guilt about having an epidural and combination feeding. I would still probably have felt a bit bad about going back to work so soon but nowhere near as much. It's sad really, that a site meant to be a source of support is actually often a source of guilt.

I think the book is an enjoyable, light hearted read with some interesting points but not well written, revealing any secrets or an actual parenting manual

What I did like was the lack of guilt thought which I have decided to embrace and think is very positive.

I also liked the idea that I didn't have to be running around trying to stimulate my baby 247 and he wasn't going to explode if every second of his day was not some enriching learning experience (or rather that at his age everything already is an enriching, learning experience and he does not require me shoving a flash card in his face or repeating everything in 10 different languages or whatever to enhance it)