to think that no, actually, SS wont be interested that DS(3) watched Hellboy?

[Hellboy]

DS (3) loves proper 'boy' films like Spiderman, Transformers, Batman, Starwars etc. He recently watched Hellboy at MILs and apparantly loved it. Ive bought it for him and he has watched it a few times (Ive vetted it and there is one scene that I think might be a bit too grisly for him so I fast forward past this bit). Apart from this one scene to me its no different to Spiderman and all the other 'hero' type films and there is no swearing (apart from a few craps)

My friend (whose DS also watches Spiderman, Batman etc) has said that if DS goes into nursery going on about Hellboy, then they will call SS as its a sign that we are letting him watch inappropriate films as its a horror film (its classed as a PG-13, Spiderman is a 12 so to me there isnt much difference)

I take my lead from DS, and I do think there may be a time when he will be more aware of what goes on in these films (eg. the idea that there is a hell, baddies that want to hurt us etc) so when that time comes I will of course take the lead from him again. But for now he loves the action bits, we have a right laugh together when we watch them and tbh its nice to not have to watch endless Chris and Pui (and we do turn it into a learning experience - what colour is Hellboy, how many baddies can you see etc )

I dont want to start the age old debate of age limits for films etc, we are just talking about the usual films that most of the kids at his nursery have seen. My friend just thinks that me letting DS watch Hellboy is an invite to get SS involved

So, is she being ridiculous and hypocritical? Or am I being too laid back about what SS would get involved in?

despicable me is nothing like hellboy and i HAVE seen both of them, you cannot seriously compare the two!!

Winny I have read some of the research when this subject has come up on MN in the past.

If all we did was sit scratching our arses watching Hellboy 1 and 2, followed by Spiderman 1-3, followed by etc etc then Id agree, but 1 film a week? No, I do not believe I am raising the next antichrist by letting him watch one film a week for being a good boy or if he feels ill and wants to just lie and do nothing.

Yes, Hellboy, it means parental guidance. They have obviously vastly over
estimated the parental intelligence in your case.

winnybella I would much rather my children watch films that we see and enjoy as family and know that they know it all PRETEND than grow up with your judgemental and rude attitude to people your poor children

my point, 4madboys, was where do you draw the line? Animated violence is OK but Computer Generated isn't ?

For instance, as in the OP, is there a line between Hellboy and Batman (although she doesn't specify which one)? I wouldn't have said so, myself (I found Batman the scarier of the two)

winnybella, have you read the research?

Flogging - I dont think they had me specifically in mind when they classified it, Im not well known in Hollywood

But it surely doesn't matter that your friend's children watch Batman and Transformers when those are also films that are not aimed at small children.

Batman is quite a dark film - I can't imagine why any parent would deliberately show it to a 3 year-old.

It is completely irrelevant that other films might be less/more violent with higher/lower ratings, or that other parents might think them acceptable viewing. The point is that this specific film has a rating consistent with some of its content and clearly isn't a film intended for viewing by a pre-schooler.

Your friend is being hypocritical - but perhaps you should both be being judgemental of each other's viewing decisions, rather than her being wrong to be judgemental of yours.

Stealth - out of all the Batmans its the first one (and bits of the Catwoman one) I think it a bit much as a whole so DS doesnt watch those (my friends DS does and I dont judge her for it at all, but do find it a bit that Batman (with Joker falling into a vat of acid, someone being electrocuted etc) is fine but Hellboy means Im bringing the wrath of Childrens Services onto us.

Hes watched parts of the newer ones as they are more 'comicky' IYSWIM?

No probs OP. Glad to be of service.

Just a small point on what several people have said about violence in U/PG rated films. It is all about the 'context' within which that violence is shown and how and why it is in the film. How violence and death is presented in a U will differ greatly to how it is presented in a 12 or 15 rated film. Hence why such classifications matter.

Whether or not such material is harmful to a developing child's mind is very much like the argument for smoking. Yes, you could smoke for 50 years and come to no harm. But by smoking you increase your likelihood of coming to harm. Same with exposure to inappropriate material at an early age. It may, depending on the individual, their personality and circumstances, do no harm. However it does increase the chances of harm. Why take the risk?

Kungfu - no it doesnt matter to me what her kids watch, it only matters when shes being all holier than thou about what my DS watches and then cant see the irony of putting the same kind of film on for her DS.

I dont judge her, shes a great mum, her DS is lovely, our kids play geat together. If like some people on here think I do, she just sits him infront of the DVD 9 hours a day then Id judge my arse off. But all I judge is her hypocriteness (is that a word?)

Old movies rated U is a red herring. Many of these were made before there was an age related rating system, they were rated by the filming company and overarching national film industry as 'appropriate for the public' and no other ratings so all movies before a certain point are rated U because there was no other rating system in place at the time the movie was made other than acceptable/unacceptable. There is no system to re-rate movies officially after they are made even if the whole rating system changes.

The age ratings have also changed a lot over time since it first came into place as the evidence of the media, particularly on kids, comes to light so older age ratings likely don't reflect what would be the current age ratings.

OP, I think the main argument against watching it (just like watching movies or TV that annoys you) is that there is currently so much media available, so many appropriate movies, why choose a questionable one over them? Why watch Hellboy when you two could watch Babies (lovely movie that had my 7, 5, and 2 year old giggling and cooing like mad during our movie time this week) or, if you'd like a milder scare, Arrietty (an adaption of the Borrowers). There is so much available these days that there is little need for the harder stuff for little ones.

PermanatlyontheEdge "YOU didn't watch this stuff at three, it wasn't available like it is now".... not true!. At 4 my mum let me watch Bladerunner and I was petrified. I understnad that a lot of perople think OP is wrong to allow this, but that is their opinion and IMO a lot of parents do things that I would never ever let my child do.... LIke staying up late at adult parties, getting drunk at social occassions in front of their kids, letting them ride scooters on the pavements on main roads on the way to school, letting them ride in those little carry things on the back of parents bikes. All of these things make me feel very anxious, and not things I would do, but its their parents choice. And my choice is that I dont think Jurassic Park is an awful film for children to watch and IMO nor is Harry Potter.

Or why take the risk to cross the road we may get knocked over...seriously

Wrt to watching his reactions next time he watches it OP, I think the whole point is that you may not necessarily see the way in which it affects him - until a much later date. Have you not read We Need To talk about Kevin?!

SS will definitely not get involved but they should to help prevent potential future problems with children who have been exposed to things like this. I used to work for social workers and a parent once self referred because she was worried because her 4 year old was becoming more and more violent. When she visited the house the boy was playing on a playstation game that was for 12+. The social worker tried to explain to the parent the type of games he was playing on may be encouraging his behaviour but the parent would not take it on board. The social worker said to me 'If he is playing on that crap when I am there, what the bloody hell is he looking at when I am not there'. In the end she just concluded that the parent was stupid.

Is it just me or is it amazing that I have 4 healthy, happy, confident, kind, polite high achieving children! look at list of frowned upon behaviour Louie159... the things on back of bikes OMG everyone needs to chill out

Well we'll just have to take your word for that, imnotyourmum

I hope they can write better than you at any rate imnotmymum

I agree VRH, here won't be much reaction if he is desensitised.

SS won't be interested in this, however, if any other issues come up they will use it to build a case against you.

However, it is an example of shit and lazy parenting.

imnotmymum - Im not saying that there is anything wrong with the things on the back of bikes! Im saying that I would never put my child in one..... and you might think that Jurassic Park isnt OK for a 4 year old! Im trying to say that parenting is a choice and since this child isnt on child protection register, isnt seeing filsm like SAW then IMO its not as bad as some people are making it out to be.... I havent watched Hellboy but if its Like Spiderman I cant see what the fuss is about?! Does no one remember how awful the Grimm fairy tales are?

Well yes you will Proudnscary and thescarlett they write beautifully thank you as do. Just pointing out that it is bizarre that someone would think it bad parenting to let a child ride on a scooter or on the back of a bike !![we do have to be at part on the main road as rural and no paths]and my DC have skiied without helmets. Bad Bad Mother !!!

I think it would take more than 1.5 - 2 hours a week of a few superhero films to desensitise him to such a state that I cant see any reaction

TBH Im more worried about Baby fucking Jake making him regress into babbling like a baby

its not whether its animated or computer generated its the context and the way it is presented in the film, in despicable me its humorous and slapstick, its funny, there is no death or even anyone getting hurt, its humours, things going bang and failed attempts at creating a squid gun etc. you cant compare that to hellboy.

and there is plenty of other stuff out there that is far more appropriate for them to watch and then when old enough and when they can actually understand the film, then let them watch these films with you.