Sister In Law from Hell

[jet77]

Hi, Just venting but my SIL is driving me mad - she and her husband own a business which seems to make her think she is the busiest most important person in the world (which she is not she spends 50% of the year in france) but yet despite all the money and time to go to france she hasn't been to see her nephew who is now 11months old - well actually she popped in for an hour on her way to france about 9 months ago. This is the latest in a long long line of similiar self-important behaviour and I have reached my breaking point. Situation is made worse because DH not v good at challenging her so I have said - look if you want to accomodate your sister (by going for a £400 2 annual leave days trip to Ireland) that's fine but dont expect me to go - is there really a reason she can't come to us and make the effort everyone else has to make - ie a pre-arranged trip not just popping by 'on her way to somewhere else- husband trying to imply I am being selfish but I really am not - any views

It would save so much time if MN Towers could just start a new section called IANBU.

How can you be at breaking point with a person you never see?

Your baby is 11 months. She has seen him once. So what?

1. I've survived life-threatening illness and nearly died in childbirth too. Does that give me special entitlement points?
2. You are right. Clearly your child is not her priority.
3. You do seem to have mentioned SILs holidays an awful lot. What colour eyes do you have? No, let me guess.

ok i am not jealous I am more wealthy than she and own my own holiday home worth more and have more assets etc- i also think in her own way sil is ok - i also dont mind if people have different opinions absolutley fine and dont want to prolong this post - but to be honest a lot of the replies are obnoxious and no more than bullying and every thread i look at has a similiar angle someone posts an innocent question then is bombarded with sh*t

I must have missed the background to this, but I don't really understand why this is making you so angry.

She doesn't sound like the SIL from hell, she sounds like a woman who has her own life, which is busy and has very specific priorities. Maybe she is even rather selfish.

I think you are over thinking it.

If you don't want to go and visit her, then don't. She has clearly reached the same conclusion herself.

I'd spend less time thinking and getting wound up about this if I were you.

Jane are you OP? I don't understand!

OP - if you're more wealthy than SIL, it's not a problem to cough up and go visit her.

OP you sound a bit odd, and I'm slightly confused as you seem to have two names.

Nc fail

OP - it not about the money its the principle and the time and the attitude - all I can say is some of the idiotic posts on here make me realise that sil not that bad :)

OP are you janechesire and jet77 ?

She clearly doesn't want to spend time with you. Get over it. Enjoy your baby. Yes, you sound very angry and people as angry as you do not make for great company. I do not blame her one bit.

i am over it - just suprised by the lack of quality of some of the posts - i am not very angry at all actually just bored of posters like you

yabu.

maybe she just isn't bothered about your child?

Quint, I have some googly eyes you can stick on that if you like? !!

Quint, I have some googly eyes you can stick on that if you like? !!

Gosh, angry indeed. I feel sorry for you.

Glad you have some clarity!

You clearly expect too much of others, and too little of yourself.
A combination which can be quite challenging for those around you, and might explain why you see so little of your sister in law. You chose your friends, not your family.

I too am confused but you sound like you are incredibly jealous.

Has it occured to you that she may well be working when she is in France - I don't know and it doesn't sound as if you do either!

I don't see the problem with not flying over to see her Nephew, might be the only one but it seems sensible to fit in more than one thing when you are doing something else. If she is not in the area very often, why could you not have rearranged around christmas.

Either way, just because she doesn't visit and has her own business and goes on holiday doesn't really sound like she is the SIL from hell. I can definitely one up you on that level.

oh hang on, janecheshire is the OP?
confused.

I am confused about why you posted this in January too?

I can see no evidence that she is from Hell - from France, yes, but that is a different issue.