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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

WIBU to book a 'pamper' party for 7yo?

323 replies

GreatBallsOfFluff · 24/02/2012 21:30

DD is turning 7 soon and I'm trying to think of what to do for her birthday. For the last 3 years I have hired a hall and had an entertainer/dj but I simply cannot afford it this year.

I'm really not good with entertaining and interacting with other people's children which is why I've always done that sort of party. The thought of having 7 or 8 of her friends at my home to entertain for 2 hours fills me with absolute dread.

I suggested to DD going bowling with a few friends. She wasn't interested. I suggested taking her and a couple of friends to the cinema. Again, she said no. I asked her what she wanted, and she shrugged. I then (foolishly) suggested a pamper type party with nail varnish and the like. She really liked the idea

So I've had a quick look around the internet and found the following:

PAMPER 2)
The mini princess Pamper age 4 up
This glittery party is recommended for children of all ages. All products are non toxic & kiddie friendly where possible & always age appropriate. Shimmery make-up is applied to cheeks, eyelids & lip gloss to create fun glamour!

Price includes:

Themed invitations
Gentle file & paint for fingers OR toes
Glitter & sparkle non toxic polish & nail stickers/art (age 4+)
Glitter make-up Age appropriate make-up (shimmering cheeks, eye shadow & lip gloss)
Face jewels
Hair straighteners, crimpers & heated tongs.
Fruit punch fountain with pink plastic cocktail glasses & accessories
Glitter hair Highlights
Spray of perfume
Aftercare advice
CONTACT ME FOR MORE INFO

So I was wondering what you would all think if your little girl was invited to a party like this, or is it an absolutely stupid idea which I shouldn't even entertain doing, and convince DD that a perfect idea for her 7th birthday would be perhaps her first sleepover with her best friend?

Please be gentle

OP posts:

poinsetta · 24/02/2012 21:33

My Dd is 6. I wouldn't be all that happy about it. I am quite against small children and make up and would find it hard to keep telling her she can't wear it if there was a party for it. maybe old fashioned but that's my opinion. Sorry.

CHOOGIRL · 24/02/2012 21:34

My DD (aged 6) would love it

yousankmybattleship · 24/02/2012 21:35

I think it is comepletely inappropriate and utterly hideous, but I'm sure you'll get plenty who'll think it's fine. Each to their own I suppose, but if my DD was invited to this I'd make up an excuse (she is 7 by the way).

Original poster

GreatBallsOfFluff · 24/02/2012 21:36

No need to say sorry poinsetta -the point of me posting was to get opinions as to how others would think

OP posts:

Pinkjenny · 24/02/2012 21:39

We are doing something similar for our 5yo, think the package includes face painting, nail stickers and sparkly hairspray, along with a disco. I intend to ask the parents beforehand and let them decide if they want their dd to come. Up to them. I completely appreciate that some people won't approve, and don't want them to feel awkward, nor would I want their dd to feel uncomfortable.

Each to their own, I guess.

DoMeDon · 24/02/2012 21:39

Lots of DC would love this and that's kind of what makes me a bit sad about it. You've offered it now though but it's not something I'd let our girls go to.

Sandalwood · 24/02/2012 21:41

I wouldn't want my DD to have the tongs/straighteners and I'd feel bad about saying so.

Uncomfortable all round really.

My DD (when she was 6) has been to a party where they got their nails done and those horrible transfer things on their arms etc - and I felt the lack of imagination a bit sad really a waste of a party.

And anyway, is it really worth paying someone to do a bit of varnish etc? 7 year olds don't need a professional.

Original poster

GreatBallsOfFluff · 24/02/2012 21:41

It's not a 'we're definitely doing it' DoMeDon, it's a case of asking for her ideas and seeing what she'd like. If I was definitely doing it, then I wouldn't have bothered asking here.

Thanks everyone so far for your input.

OP posts:

shesparkles · 24/02/2012 21:42

Sorry but it wouldn't be my choice for a child so young-if you're doing it at that age, what's left for when she's older?

When my dd was 7, like you we'd done all the local play places etc and she decided she wanted an old fashioned "at home" party....like you I'm rubbish with other people's kids, and I was worse then (bad depression at the time) but to be honest, other than a few games-musical bump/statues/chairs etc, they pretty much entertained themselves....she still speaks about it yet as one of her best parties, and she's coming up for 15!

desperatenotstupid · 24/02/2012 21:45

firmly on the fence - i am not into little ones wearin make up, but i did a stall at the school fair last year putting nail jewels on the girls and nail varnishes - they loved it. But make up? at 7? no

aquashiv · 24/02/2012 21:46

I would be interested to hear the cost.

I dont see anything wrong with it for a girly 7 year old. My neice had something similar in Oz. My own daughter would just howl with laughter if I suggested this.

BrianCoxHasScaryHair · 24/02/2012 21:46

Do what you as her parent feels is appropriate.

I took DD and her friend to a beautician (family friend) for her 7th birthday.

they loved it, was very much a 'pretend' thing - facial, manicure, pedicure, bit of sparkly stuff on their face and some lip gloss.

Was fun, nothing too serious, DD is now 8 and last time I looked she wasn't walking the streets touting for business

However, if it's not your cup of tea - don't do it.

How about an afternoon tea party, any local cafe's that would do one for you?

I know my DD would love that too - the cake stands and china tea cups, big hit.

Swimming party? My local swimming pool does organised pool parties.

DoMeDon · 24/02/2012 21:49

I do realise that GBOF but you suggested it and she liked it- the offer must have made her think it's an option - I would decide if something was ok with me before putting it out there.

PeanutButterChocolate · 24/02/2012 21:54

I wouldn't be crazy about this, OP. What about a baking party or some sort of craft (you can get pre-fab kits from the craft/hobbies shop). Sleepover is a great idea if you think DDBF is independent enough? Rent a movie, popcorn, pancakes for breakfast...

moogalicious · 24/02/2012 21:54

agree with yousank. Horrible. Smacks of sexualisation.

BrianCoxHasScaryHair · 24/02/2012 21:55

Sexualisation? FFS.

HoneyandHaycorns · 24/02/2012 21:57

Sorry, I have a little girl of the same age, and I would be very uncomfortable about this. I'd also find it quite awkward saying no if it was a close friend's party. I'm not sure what I would do tbh.

If I did let her go, I'd have to veto the eyeshadow etc because she has very sensitive skin. I hate make-up on small children anyway. I would also want to veto the tongs/straighteners. I could live with the nail varnish. I would worry about her feeling left out though if I vetoed half the party so might just invent another commitment & tell her that she couldn't go.

moogalicious · 24/02/2012 22:00

Yes brian they are 7 years old. FFS.

Sandalwood · 24/02/2012 22:00

Do they get a fake tan too?

HoneyandHaycorns · 24/02/2012 22:02

Sorry, I have a little girl of the same age, and I would be very uncomfortable about this. I'd also find it quite awkward saying no if it was a close friend's party. I'm not sure what I would do tbh.

BrianCoxHasScaryHair · 24/02/2012 22:02

Surely though re the tongs/straighteneres - little girls have always had their hair curled, why the big fuss?

It's not as though they'll be walking down the street day in, day out, like this.

It's a party, a one-off.

If you don't like, don't do.

I can't see the harm, but I realise I am in the minority.

I loved playing with make-up as a child and I enjoy wearing it now (nothing to do with anybody else, I enjoy it)

DD has bits and bobs to play with in the house, she doesn't wear any outside the house.

I don't get it. Please don't shout 'sexualisation' at me, my DD is well rounded/loved/cared for and definitely not sexualised. She's just a child who enjoys dressing up and putting the odd bit of make-up on badly

she also likes to pretend she's a mum, to her baby doll. Is this encouraging her to go out, have sex and get pregnant?

This is why I don't understand the shock/horror. If you as a parent are ok with it, if your daughter wants to do it, do it. If not, don't.

moogalicious · 24/02/2012 22:02

sandalwood

Original poster

GreatBallsOfFluff · 24/02/2012 22:05

Thank you everyone for your views. I thought it would be the case that most wouldn't like it, and I wouldn't want to have a party where some of DD's friends weren't allowed to come or be left out so thanks.

OP posts:

moogalicious · 24/02/2012 22:06

I'm not shouting sexualisation at you brian and this is nothing like playing with a doll.

Not shock/horror either. I think little girls should be little girls. Not treated like teenagers. I have 2 dds, aged 5 and 10. I wouldn't be happy for either of them to go to a pamper party. I think it's ridiculous.

Just my opinion. Don't take it personally.

BrianCoxHasScaryHair · 24/02/2012 22:08

'Shouting' turn of phrase - not saying you 'shouted at me'

Not taking it personally.

Just interested in why the general shock/horror - my last messag was aimed 'in general' and referred back to the 'sexualisation' as saying that, to me, makes me a really bad mother who is doing that to their daughter. When in reality, I'm not. Which I know, and am comfortable with.

Find the whole issue interesting, that's all.

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