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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

WIBU to book a 'pamper' party for 7yo?

323 replies

GreatBallsOfFluff · 24/02/2012 21:30

DD is turning 7 soon and I'm trying to think of what to do for her birthday. For the last 3 years I have hired a hall and had an entertainer/dj but I simply cannot afford it this year.

I'm really not good with entertaining and interacting with other people's children which is why I've always done that sort of party. The thought of having 7 or 8 of her friends at my home to entertain for 2 hours fills me with absolute dread.

I suggested to DD going bowling with a few friends. She wasn't interested. I suggested taking her and a couple of friends to the cinema. Again, she said no. I asked her what she wanted, and she shrugged. I then (foolishly) suggested a pamper type party with nail varnish and the like. She really liked the idea Hmm Confused

So I've had a quick look around the internet and found the following:

PAMPER 2)
The mini princess Pamper age 4 up
This glittery party is recommended for children of all ages. All products are non toxic & kiddie friendly where possible & always age appropriate. Shimmery make-up is applied to cheeks, eyelids & lip gloss to create fun glamour!

Price includes:

Themed invitations
Gentle file & paint for fingers OR toes
Glitter & sparkle non toxic polish & nail stickers/art (age 4+)
Glitter make-up Age appropriate make-up (shimmering cheeks, eye shadow & lip gloss)
Face jewels
Hair straighteners, crimpers & heated tongs.
Fruit punch fountain with pink plastic cocktail glasses & accessories
Glitter hair Highlights
Spray of perfume
Aftercare advice
CONTACT ME FOR MORE INFO

So I was wondering what you would all think if your little girl was invited to a party like this, or is it an absolutely stupid idea which I shouldn't even entertain doing, and convince DD that a perfect idea for her 7th birthday would be perhaps her first sleepover with her best friend?

Please be gentle Blush

OP posts:
HoneyandHaycorns · 24/02/2012 23:02

FWIW, if your dd's heart is set on something like this, I reckon you could do a DIY toned down version. Someone mentioned mashed banana on faces, and you could do cucumber slices for the eyes etc. Hair styling with various accessories but no tongs etc. Nail buffers are also quite good at making nails shiny, though personally, I could live with the nail varnish. Maybe just something a bit more age appropriate?

startail · 24/02/2012 23:20

Perhaps 7 is a touch young, but by 9/10 they'll be doing it themselves.Grin

Sleepovers in variably turn in to beauty parlours.

DD2, just 11 in make up for her birthday shopping trip left me a bit Hmm
Suddenly she doesn't look totally like a little girl playing.

megapixels · 24/02/2012 23:20

I wouldn't send mine. DD1 got invited to one of these and she was really torn. Because she wanted to go for the party and be with all her friends but she wasn't interested in doing her nails or that kind of stuff. Not all girls are into it. She kept saying it sounds boring and silly. In the end she didn't go.

BlueFergie · 24/02/2012 23:21

Well I am going to against the majority and say that I would have no problem with this. My DD is 5 and she would combust with joy at the idea of this sort of party. Her and DS often raid my (very sparse) make up bag and paint each other face. It's just fun to them.
my kids do all sorts of things at their parties that they wouldn't do on a daily basis. Eat loads of crap food, have bouncy castles in the back garden, get their face painted. So in a couple of years I would have no problem letting her have his sort of party. I mean its not that different from face painting to kids its just decoration and fun to them.

desperatenotstupid · 24/02/2012 23:28

If someone went near my 6 year old with a pair of hair straigteners i should think id probably hit them over the head with them, i mean, a bunch of excited 6/7 year olds how likely to keep still, fuck, if my DD got burned i think id file an assault charge, well i woulnt cos she wodlnt be there in the first place

seeker · 24/02/2012 23:31

My dd would have LOVED it and of course I would have let her go. I would have judged you and thought less of you for organising it.

Maryz · 24/02/2012 23:32

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BlueFergie · 24/02/2012 23:32

I dont like the idea of the fake cocktails though.

snicksnack · 24/02/2012 23:43

Or 'after care advice'....

megapixels · 24/02/2012 23:57

I wouldn't have a problem with Maryz idea. It sounds like a children's party. The pamper party stuff sounds like a mini adult event.

HoneyandHaycorns · 25/02/2012 00:14

Agree, maryz's party sounds fine. And fun!

CardgamesFTW · 25/02/2012 00:22

Them girls gotta start learnin about being obsessive about their looks early on eh

Would you do it for your son?

metalelephant · 25/02/2012 00:50

I hate "pampering", have never been in a spa or had a similar beauty treatment - its just boring, infantilising stuff that turns grown women into babies. I very rarely wear makeup and feel no enthusiasm for "girly" activities. The very term makes me shudder.

Of course little girls will try makeup on, they copy older women, but why would you want to encourage a young child to feel like she has to make herself prettier, as if she doesn't look good enough?

Alligatorpie · 25/02/2012 04:43

I think it is ok, my dd ( just turned 6) would love to go. I take her for pedicures every couple of months and it is treat for the two of us.

I think the make up would be a swipe of glittery eye shadow / blush, so that you see the glitter, not anything else. I would be very surprised if they made seven years look trampy!

I too am interested in the cost. I bet you could do it at home for pretty cheap, and I think the girls would love it.I think I will do it for dd's seventh!

WMDinthekitchen · 25/02/2012 06:10

I wouldn't have done this with either of my DDs. I liked them being little girls. You have suggested it now, so very difficult to withdraw. I would have had a fun day with the family/taken your DD and a friend out for the day or whatever.

DD1 is not at all interested in fashion/style etc but DD2 most definitely is and it is sometimes a complete pain. Takes her ages to get ready, even for school. There may be many years when you have an appearance-fixated teenager in your house and I wouldn't encourage it at the age of 6/7. In any case, I would not think that a pamper session comes cheap...

Walkinginwonderland · 25/02/2012 07:08

The mini princess Pamper age 4 up.
I've just been a little sick in my mouth.

MarjorieAntrobus · 25/02/2012 07:21

Me too, walking.

MarjorieAntrobus · 25/02/2012 07:26

OP, you could take DD and her best friend(s) out for the day, then a sleepover after. There must be places she'd enjoy going to - seaside, London, theme park - though it depends where you are and what your budget is.

TroublesomeEx · 25/02/2012 07:29

Sorry, another one here saying I wouldn't let my DD go.

She's 5 and would love it unfortunately, but that doesn't mean it would be right for her.

I have huge issues with the objectification of young girls and promoting the idea that to feel special they must wear cosmetics because they're not quite good enough as they are.

I also hate the whole 'princess' thing too. Yuck.

I agree MaryZ's idea sounds ok. That is the sort of thing we would have done, although still possibly not at 7.

Morebiscuitsplease · 25/02/2012 07:37

I don't feel it is appropriate for a 7 year old. If this is what they do at 7 what will the expectation be when they are older. Craft activities are quite good for 7 year old girls. They are still " infants" at school. Yes they may like it but surely it is up to us as parents to decide if it is suitable. DH & I would not let our daughter attend.

Born2BRiiiled · 25/02/2012 07:52

I find they still want party games! Plus dancing. Even at eight they still like them. Maybe party games, plus the peel off nail varnish, plus decorate your own cake or biscuit. Any good?

ginmakesitallok · 25/02/2012 07:57

We did our own version when DD was 7. My DSIL (who is a hairdresser) did hair, Dneice and friend did nails, had friend on hand to do make-up but no-one wanted it done. While girls waited we did party games, or they played outside. All the girls loved it, none of them demanded hair and nails done for school and it hasn't raised any expectations for the future Confused They all still looked like little girls at the end of the party

helloclitty · 25/02/2012 08:10

I have a DD around this age and would be very uncomfortable with it and therefore would politely turn down the invitation.

troisgarcons · 25/02/2012 08:17

Well, there must be a market for it otherwise such things wouldnt exist.

I cant say I would be comfortable with it (if I had daughters). Casting my mind back 10 years to primary school birthday parties with 6/7/8yos dressed like hookers in boob tubes and bum freezer skirts with silly high heels was enough to make me go Hmm and thank my lucky stars I didnt have daughters TBH.

bigTillyMint · 25/02/2012 08:21

Have an old fashioned party with the old games like musical bumps and pass the parcel and cakes and jelly, etc. Will cost you very little and the girls will have loads of fun with each other as opposed to waiting in line and thinking that making yourself look nice was the only important thing.

Pamper parties (if you have to have one) are for teens, or tweens at least.

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