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Original poster

Does any one actually know kids like this?

391 replies

westcoastnortherner · 15/02/2012 16:44

Yes, Yes I know it's a Daily Mail article, but are there really that many kids like this out there?!

www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2101292/They-wear-nappies-drink-cola--dont-know-open-book-One-teachers-terrifying-insight-5-year-olds-failed-parents.html#comments

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 15/02/2012 18:41

read the thread jade80

Mandy2003 · 15/02/2012 18:41

Why would an economically deprived parent want to keep paying out for nappies when the child could be shown how to use a toilet? I really don't get that part.

jade80 · 15/02/2012 18:45

Well I knew of people who didn't. One woman was forced to leave for the first time when her son needed to travel for life or death medical care- she needed support to do this as she had no idea how to cope.

'We have buses and everything you know'- wow, really, you amaze me. Hmm

jade80 · 15/02/2012 18:46

I have read the thread.

marvinthemartian · 15/02/2012 18:46

NilbyMouth - at least 4 (probably 5, and maybe even 6) of the things on your list could be as a result of SN (ime, I must stress)

as I said in a previous post - I am not saying that these things do not happen without SN. I know that they do.

and I also do not doubt that the families need help, whether there is SN or not. clearly anyone struggling to that degree needs help.

thebestisyettocome · 15/02/2012 18:46

There are children suffering from neglect and piss poor parenting in our country. They exist.
To say they don't is burying your head in the sand.

jade80 · 15/02/2012 18:47

Seriously not following your point here- what do crap parents have to do with where they live? Some rich parents with all mod cons at home can easily be shitter than poor parents.

manicinsomniac · 15/02/2012 18:50

usual - you don't live on every council estate in the country though!

Plus, I thought one of the main points of the article was that it is NOT talking exclusively about council estates, it is talking about a widespread problem and thet eacher in the article works in a school in an affluent area.

I have worked in both a primary school in a very deprived area and in an affluent independent prep. I didn't see much of the stuff described in the article in either school but I did see a little of it in both schools - especially the untreated headlice, wearing no underwear/socks to school, smelling of wee, being au fait with computers but never having heard a nursery rhyme etc. It's very sad. There were also definitely children in the primary school who rarely left their estate (I wouldn't say never)

myBOYSareBONKERS · 15/02/2012 18:51

I see on a weekly basis children having a general anaesthetic to have rotten teeth removed. One child was 2 years old and she had 12 removed!!

deste · 15/02/2012 18:55

Could these children in nappies belong to the school of "children will ask for the potty when they are ready". "Quote" These children don?t have a medical condition. What they have are parents who think children will learn to use the lavatory by themselves. Enough said.

Noir · 15/02/2012 18:55

"I think it depends on the place kayano we have 60 - 70% of our kids on the at risk register at any one time."

Molly I question the reliability of your statement given that there is no such thing as an at risk register. If you mean children subject to child protection plans your estimated figure is also highly HIGHLY unlikely, I say that as a social worker who has worked with scores of schools across some of the most deprived authorities across the country including THE most deprived authority.

muddymooncups · 15/02/2012 18:57

I have helped with Surestart and i know that most areas give out free books at 6 months and 1 year ( i think!).

The parents i helped with, all read to their DC.

Although, i do know someone who kept their Dc in nappies until 5,so they didn't have to find a toilet when out, and in a pushchair, so they knew where the DC was.Shock
Before anyone says, No there isn't any SN.

My DD (dyslexic) used to put her clothes on back to front, wrong feet and it took her until year 3 to tie her laces.

manicinsomniac · 15/02/2012 18:57

many schools have their own at risk register Noir. It doesn't have to mean an official document

BackforGood · 15/02/2012 18:58

If you read the article, nowhere does it say 40% of children do/can't do/have all these things - it's the fact that some people assume the DM is going to be exaggerating that is the problem, not what actually is written.
I've worked with loads of dcs with the difficulties mentioned - of course they exist. Why would the professor have reason to make up a report like that ? Hmm. However, it's not new - I first came across children like this on my teaching practices back in the 80s. No, before then, I didn't know how prevalent these issues were, because before then I only knew family and friends children. Once you work professionally with families, you come across an awful lot that you might not have seen in your own social circle.

MrsHeffley · 15/02/2012 18:58

God yes.

I've taught in deprived areas in Bristol,Nottingham and Sheffield and saw exactly this in all 3 areas,it's hardly a hidden secret.It's horrible seeing 2 two thirds of a class smiling up at you with rotting teeth,starting school with zero book knowledge etc

I just don't get the head in the sand stance to this.It lets down children dreadfully.

Thankfully there are many professionals who battle on working their butt off to help such children.

thebestisyettocome · 15/02/2012 18:58

' I sang [my children] Nina Simone and motown classics.'

That is SO mumsnet Grin

MrsHeffley · 15/02/2012 19:00

I've also seen many of these problems in a less concentrated way in many other fairly affluent areas.

BackforGood · 15/02/2012 19:00

Yes, Noir - there are a lot of Nurseries too that have a list of children they are extremebly concerned about, and are doing observations / gathering evidence. I agree with manic, a lot of work is done before it gets to soc services level.

thebestisyettocome · 15/02/2012 19:03

I agree with MrsHeffley and I'm Hmm as to why 'estates' have even been mentioned.

The thing about books puts me in mind of DP whose parents called him 'gay' because of his love of reading.

sodapops · 15/02/2012 19:06

I know children like this, too.

It is very sad, and hard to believe especially if you have no personal experience of it, but unfortunately it is true.Sad

electricalbanana · 15/02/2012 19:06

this was happening 21 years ago....my DD (now 25) started in reception with basic numeracy and literacy skills. She came home after the first day and told me school was boring as all she did was "playgroup" stuff. When i went to her first parents evening i joked that DD had been a bit disappointed she wasnt doing "real schoolie stuff" straight away. Teacher said she had noticed DD was bright and had the basic skills but the problem with her class was half of the kids didnt know how to open a book.

saladsandwich · 15/02/2012 19:07

i live in a very deprived place, i have worked in the local nurseries and not come across the children in nappies and that was 3-5 year olds. come across the cola and bottles at 5 the other things are developmental stuff and i really dont think its fair to bring that into things.

molly3478 · 15/02/2012 19:08

noir - I am talking about both cp plans, two year old pilot, parenting support free attendees, surestart paid support etc. Its all encompassed together. I also dont work in a school and we only have a max of 40 registered and hardly ever have that many in at one time

ilovesprouts · 15/02/2012 19:09

my son is five and is in nappies part time ... he has sn :)

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