To be upset with dd1 teacher.

[lisad123]

I know this is likely to kick off because it's about religion, but hopefully it won't.

We a family we don't celebrate Xmas or birthdays ect. Both dds have been brought up this way and it's never been an issue to anyone (beside PIL but that's another thread)!

Dd1 is 9 and at Xmas her teacher kept making comments about Xmas being the most wonderful time ever, if you don't celebrate your missing out on something special and wonderful and no child should miss xmas. I let it wash as we were taking girls away over Xmas so dd1 wasn't fussed.

Yesterday, someone in her class was giving out birthday sweets. Dd1 refused as she knows we don't join in celebrating bdays. It's never been an issue, we have plently of sweets. Her teacher made a comment and told her it was ok, she should have one and I would never know! dd1 still refused and told me what teacher had said.
When she came out today she told me her teacher had put sweets in her tray, and told her they weren't bday sweets so she could eat them.
Now Friday is the only day we have sweets because she is a sugar addict and gets ratty and obsessive if we allow too many sweets.

So I spoke to the teacher and he said he felt sorry for her and didn't think it was fair. I explained that I understand that but this is our choice and he told me in future he would try not to say anything but he did feel sorry for her
She wants for nothing and I'm very proud of her for standing up so well to her beliefs.

I'm wondering if she was a religion that didn't eat meat if he would have such a problem.

So am I unreasonable to be upset with him?

The only adults I have met who grew up in JW families (five I can think of) all consider their childhoods to have been unhappy.mthat colours my view of it, I'm afraid. I can certainly see why the teacher was trying to be kind, even if he was clumsy about it.

Coral cannot argue about acceptance otherwise I would have remained in the religion but please don't feel sorry for the children like,that, there are very strong support mechanisms around them.

I agree my experiences are not everyone's. But I have also seen cases where the faith has stopped people drinking, erc, and given their children a much better life than they would have had.

Just refresh my memory, what happens to the rest of us?

Rhonda, I will feel for them because I have spoken with adults that have grown up in a JW house and weren't lucky enough to feel they had the same experience as you. So I know how at least some of these kids must be feeling and it breaks my heart.

I work in school and we have JW's in every class in the infants, all of of whom are very strict in their beliefs we have been told they are to be removed from the classroom for,

remembrance activities, guy Fawkes anything to do with any other faith, school disco's harvest, st David's day, anything magical, fairies, witches or anything make believe, birthdays,assemblies, valentines day Easter Christmas visit to local churches, school trips, the list seems to extend daily.

They are all late every day as they allow their children to wake up naturally- haven't come across that one before but apparently important to our families.

Chinese new year was also not allowed, to the extent of not being allowed to participate in drawing Chinese symbols or learning how to say hello in Chinese

We have to respect their beliefs but it is difficult when you have to send them out of the class with a TA when birthday cake is being handed out and can't give them any.

I do think it's about how much control you feel you gt as an adult - and I must admit to always seeing the bright side.

Btw, we are all doomed, due to die any day, though no hell, just nothingness. On that basis I was willing to take the gamble for a few years doing what I needed to. Only JWs will survive this final war between good and evil.

I am not sure I've put that the most non emotive ly - but that's why they knock your door, they are trying to save your eternal life. Not just get you out the bath. Honest.

7.5 million JW's. Thats less than scientology (although it seems hard to get a fix on the exact membership) and scientology is only half as old.

I suspect that the high rate of children leaving as soon as they can get out and a failure to recruit any reasonable level of adults is to blame for the low level of JW participation. That door to door thing...does it ever actually work? Are there people who were sitting at home (in the bath) who get a call from the JW and suddenly think 'whoa what the hell have been missing out on?'

Really if you can't attract more reasoning adults to your religion than scientology then it's a pretty poor show.

Of course scientology is sufficiently new that there hasnt been much chance for the brainwashing of children to boost their numbers to really kick in....there maybe a generational jump in their numbers sometime soon.

Yes, because I've witnessed first hand the damage that can be done. Might seem trivial to some, but hey, as long as they get to paradise, hey

Bullie allowing your children to wake naturally is not a jw deliver, nor is refusing to a,low them to learn about other religions or learn words in another language.

All I can say is dd has never been late to school she is year 4!

Entropygirl- it does work, occasionally, when they come across someone in a very vulnerable position.

I'm now finding it rather funny that he got me out the bath! Ah well, if I get a place in Heaven as a result (although as a Christian I believe I do anyway) then it was worth it!

Deliver = belief. Sorry.

And yes my heart does break when I think about these kids spending afternoons being dragged round door to door, to stand there listening to there parents whittering on about paradise on earth all the while Johnny from the year above is at his window sniggering with his mates. The world is cruel and hard enough as it is, why make it harder and cut half the fun out of it?

I am just stating my experiences, the children are categorically not allowed to learn about other faiths, to the point of one child putting their hands over their ears when a teacher began to talk about what is inside a church, she was quickly ushered out and we read a book and did a maths activity.

We can only go on what the parents tell us, who are we as non practising JW to question what they tell us they would like for thief children?

Sciencetorly(I can't spell) is recorded to have 8million but if you read the research it suggests their numbers are alot lower and decreasing. I wonder how many join to celebratory spot
Door to door knocking does work and number increase every year. Many people are searching for faith these days when they see what's happening

Yes the door to door knocking does work. It recruited my MIL, at the time a young woman with small children on very little sleep. She recruited my PIL.
My DH left as soon as he could after a very unhappy childhood, including being tormented mercilessly at school for something that took up his entire childhood.

Sorry, their children

Lisa - out of interest the recruitment from door to door knocking - it is of mostly sleep deprived mothers and lonely elderly people? My DH has some awful tales of spending his childhood in the houses of people with mental health issues for hours on end because they were doing door to door with PIL.

@23:26 should read MIL recruited FIL sorry

Honestly the people of the future will look back on the religious indoctrination of minors in the same way we look back on the Victorian practice of treating kids as slave labour.

One day we are going to wake up to the fact that we dont own our children and they have every right to form their own opinions about the world free from stereotypes and brainwashing.

Really, I would expect religions to welcome this, as if we leave kids to learn unfettered and find their own belief systems then every Christian will be a real Christian and every JW will be a real JW.

Surely bums on seats dont count more than true belief? (A vicar told me this once when I tearfully explained that I didnt think confirmation was right for me as I didn't experience faith.)

Bullie they are obviously misinformed. I'm going to voice one of my concerns about this and any proselytising religion, which is that they do attract hugely damaged peoplle, and I'd suggest this has more to do with children not being at school on time .which I can one hundred percent assure you is not and never has been a belief, ditto not learning about other religions, which is not an act of worship.

I really want to post something nice as I know you are very helpful on the SN board but....

I find the whole JW thing unsavoury to the point where you have now put me off posting on the Special Needs board about my sons' leukaemia. I should have just let him die 2 years ago then - not allowed a transfusion? Totally off topic and I'll probably be flamed. I even have a sign on my door now saying "no JW's".

Each to their own and all that. I'll just jog on and leave you to worry about sweeties.