We are being watched !!

[domesticgodessintraining]

A friend just called from the Middle East to say that the bored desperate housewives of Dubai are slagging us off ........

www.expatwoman.com/forum/messages.aspx?TopicID=171798

Interesting article here

I also recommend reading McMafia.

ethically I can sleep at night, if she did not have this job she, and her 7 children (which incidently are going to school and uni solely because of the money she can send home) would be on the streets, period

I dont think I could sit comfortably knowing that 7 children didnt have their mum TBH. her work for you [or anyone else she might work for] may well pay to feed/clothe and educate them, but dont you think its sad that her children only see their mother for 30 days [tops] per year?

Her employment package with you sounds fair for its kind, but seriously do you truely believe she is happy? rarely sees her own children?

Would you do it? not see your children for any more than once a year? I know I wouldnt, so I wouldnt expect any other woman to, Im not worth any more than a woman in her position. we are all mothers.

dailymail - quality newspaper! At the end of the day it is each to their own - life in the UAE is far from perfect, but you have to make the best of it and not judge other peoples choices.

the difference is Amberleaf that it is actually in their psyche (sp?) - they accept perfectly that to provide for their family they will need to work away - it seems alien to us and I certainly could not do it but I know alot of people who take a lot of pride in the fact that are able to provide for their families. This does come at a price and I have no doubt that they miss their family, I know my maid does, but its a price that seem more equipped to pay than we ever could be.

Unbelievably the expatwoman thread watching this thread has been removed!! You couldn't make it up. I give up... it's past my bedtime now anyway - looking forward to catching up in the morning...

fluffybob - now that doesn't suprise me, censorship is big news here, or small news depending on how censored it is!

It is a difficult one. My employer has a big stance on Corporate Social Responsibility. We wouldn't deal with anyone who employs child labour for example. Child labour is full on exploitation, yes.....but you have one scenario where the child works and the alternative where he doesn't - and starves. Neither option seems particularly appealing....

My concern is more to do with the labourers in Dubai, who bought the right to work there and were thoroughly conned. They purchased slavery in all but name. I could not live knowing that my deluxe apartment or whatever was built off the back of that.

You've stopped me in my tracks Portofino. We've come full circle. Grown women, mothers, come to Dubai to earn money so that their kids can get an education and have enough to eat. Child labour can never be justified - children need an education otherwise they have no chance and their parents or the authorities should be making sure they don't starve. I can't believe you've been so against Dubai and housemaids and yet are indifferent towards child labour. Your employer could go one step further and support a charity that looks after these children.

the difference is Amberleaf that it is actually in their psyche (sp?) - they accept perfectly that to provide for their family they will need to work away

I knew you would say that!

Ive heard someone use the same argument re bar girls in Thailand etc, I know the jobs are very different but the principle is the same ie 'they' are used to it, its what 'they' have to do to provide for their families.

It doesnt make it right, it is exploitation. You wouldnt do it would you?

I don?t really think saying when is the damn mosque going to be finished is an insult to Islam but someone in the UAE obviously did as the British man was jailed for a month.

I don?t read the Daily Mail it was the first one that came up when I googled it.

Sandycandy from what I have read of the EW site and from what close friends that live in Dubai have told me there is a lot more that goes on under the radar. I?m sure you are aware that most stories are not reported in the papers. Prostitution is rife, child and human trafficking, slave labour and draconian laws these are just a few reasons why I for one never want to step foot in the place. Yes, we have issues in the UK, but the UK is huge compared to Dubai so it?s quite possible to live in ignorant bliss. My friend told me that she can?t even go out for a meal with her DH without seeing hookers, she can?t go to the shops without having men leer at her, she has to explain to her children why men are queuing up in 40 degree heat for a bus to be shipped off to labour camps, she even had someone spit at her for showing her arms in a public place.

But as you say each to their own !!

Totally agree with portofino

My ghastly XP has a business out there and it suits him down to the ground. He never saw anything wrong with buying a workers compound along with all the indentured workers in it, and gettng some more poor souls in from the Phillipines to work for a pittance, whilst suffering appallingly dangerous working conditions.

I went there a few times - a vile place with a really sinister undercurrent, but dressed up in quasi-western finery.

porto agreed. I felt very strongly that I didn't want to employ someone who had left a young family back home. As a mother of young children is was something I found incomprehensible having to leave your child but I sometimes wonder whether the job I offer may be"more needed" by a mother

For goodness sake. Where is your friend going with her DH? There are hookers in the sort of places you find hookers (lots. I used to live in one such area) but they aren't universally present; 'leering' is in the eye of the beholder (there is certainly more looking), and labourers aren't being "shipped off" to labour camps any more than children are 'shipped off' home after a day at school; the 'camps' are where they live. And some are better than others. If your friend wants to engage her children with the issue, there are various expat 'support the labourers' projects she could involve them with.

And I have shown my arms in public places for the last 10 years and nobody has ever spat at me.

Portofino, I know what you mean about the child labour, but where child labour prevails, the child is generally the only/one of the only breadwinners - the job is there and the child's mother/father/uncle/aunt could have it if children weren't being used.

The mothers away from their kids I do find heartbreaking, especially the ones (usually waitresses) who will borrow your kids for a little cuddle - luckily my maid's son is all grown up; but at least these kids are getting an education, generally on the back of their mothers' sacrifices. I think it's pretty impressive that they are prepared to do that, and I don't know what the answer is (nor do I know the answer with regard to the bar girls - at least with the maids/waitresses/etc here, they are not selling themselves.)

As for the 'slave' labourers, as far as I have been able to ascertain it is virtually always the home country agencies who take money from the men. It isn't the case that every labourer here comes on that system; but it is an identified problem.

Getorf, there are regulations, hopefully they will catch up with your ex.

I worked for an international engineering firm once and they used to talk about 'de-compressing' the blokes who came back from working in Dubai and the ME. Their attitudes to their colleagues when they were posted back to the UK was usually noticeably offensive - clicking fingers, pointing at women colleagues and saying 'you', being borderline physical with junior staff, aggressive posturing.

Not sure what that proves, I'm just in a sharing mood

"Article 177 of the Penal Code of Dubai imposes imprisonment of up to 10 years on consensual sodomy. Sexual orientation and gender identity remain taboo topics, with the most common depiction in the local media of LGBT people involving foreigners, disease and sex crimes such as rape."

Who wants to live in a country like that? I mean, really?

I can well imagine, sue.

I don't doubt that there are many expats who treat their staff well, and look after them and ensure they are paid decently.

However I will never forget looking for a (newly built) house with my ex. There was a room off the kitchen with a tiny window in, no bigger than a cipboard. I assumed it was a storage closet. It was actually the maids quarters. Onky room in the house with no aircon. The attutide that domestic staff are somehow less than human pervades the place.

More laughable was the 'staff ettiquette' problem pages in the expat newspapers 'I am so angry that my maid has broken 2 glasses this month, shall I dock her wages?'

labourers aren't being "shipped off" to labour camps any more than children are 'shipped off' home after a day at school; the 'camps' are where they live

Oh thats alright then.

Gosh! And?

I assume children do not live housed in desert barracks miles from anywhere, or have their passports taken away, or have no right to quit their job/ change employers or protest working conditions.

It?s the smugness that gets me, comments on language (as if none of them have ever sworn in their lives), comments on how we are bitter because their life is so much better as they have a maid or live in a big square concrete box.
You have to wonder why they?re there in the first place...... but then Dubai does have a reputation for hiring people that can?t get a job in their own countries.

100% agree with Porto.

It's vile.

While I agree that a lot of the employment conditions for maids sound exploitative, the best way to tackle exploitative working practices is not usually to prevent the exploited people from being employed at all. Its to improve their conditions. I can understand the knee jerk response of saying people shouldn't employ maids at all, etc. Especially as some employers are so utterly repulsive. And there are clearly some who want to leave but are being stopped from doing so. But AmberLeaf don't you think its possible that there are some maids who wouldn't thank you for talking them out of their jobs? If I felt that working in Dubai for 11 months a year was the best option I had, I wouldn't like to have my contract terminated and be sent home to starve with my family. You say you wouldn't do it, well in their position you might, if you had no other viable alternative.

I think it would be much better to advocate for improved conditions for the maids instead. Or fix the global economic system to create enough jobs in the Phillippines, of course. But option one seems more likely.

I can't see the thread. Has it been deleted?