new car

[pissedofforwhat]

to expect a car of the same value as DH. He thinks not and I am sad. Mostly I feel sad because it is like he feels I am worth less

It depends. What do you both use your cars for? Does he have to have a certain type of car to maintain status at work or for visiting clients?

Yes, you got it one, but does that really make a difference to have a show off car to impress clients?

Buy it yourself, get what suits you, with your own money. Simples.

Hmmm... You're, presumably, equal partners so I would think the automatic answer would be "yes" but it may depend on what you both use your cars for. If you or your H just potter about you probably wouldn't need the kind of car that easily copes with 1000s of motorway miles, for example. If one of you travels long distances and one doesn't, it may account for a different type of car which may be reflected in the cost...

I hate the culture of getting a little run around for 'er indoors. It is fecking patronising (and old fashioned - it reflects the idea that women shouldn't have "nice" cars because they won't be able to handle them or will just crash them in the supermarket car park).

So I have a 3.5l beast of a car that makes most mechanics pee their pants. It's fairly old and wasn't expensive but is very much a drivers' car.

I doubt people would take certain types of people as seriously if they drove an old banger depending on the proffession!

It all depends on what you can afford, what the cars are being used for etc but most two car families I know have a good car and a run around.

Unfortunately, I think it does make a difference in those circumstances. First impressions count and the first impressions of an Audi are very different to the first impressions of a Fiat.

An expensive car = this person is successful = They will be successful for me too = I feel confident working/doing business with them.

YANBU to feel a bit or about it.

YABU to feel

I bloody hate the "run around for the little woman" culture as well. I drive the big one, DH has the run around, if it is such a thing. My car is nothing special but it's the bigger, newer car we take on holiday etc.

he has a top of the range range rover but tells me i have to have a 2nd hand one considerably cheaper. i do need 4 x 4 because of where we live.

If you can afford to buy and run two cars of equal value then yanbu and he's being a bit silly and making a fuss about nothing

i actually dont care about having a 2nd hand one, the point is I feel so hurt that he thinks it is good enough for me but not for him. Unofrtunately I am a creature of great principles.

Ok, this is clearly a wind up. Nobody in their right mind complains about not feeling valued because they have to have a second hand range rover.

Well take your principles and your cash and buy what you want. Like I said -simples.

I have the better car, he is about to build himself an electric one...

I think on the whole whoever drives any children most needs to have a good, solid car...whoever does most miles needs economy etc. If joint finances surely all of this sort of thing is a joint decision, and as such the big car should be too?

See I disagree, house is a joint purchase both use it, car you buy yourself unless you share it.

he drives many miles, I drive quite far on sch runs. I am a SAHM, however, if I were Mr successful instead, I would want my spouse to have as much as me . This is not a wind-up, this is me feeling really sad and undervalued. The make of car is not the point, it could just as easily be an old fiat and new one IYSWIM.

It's utter nonsense. I have a large family car produced by a popular manufacturer which is less than one year old and I am very very pleased with it. It isn't flash, it isn't uber powerful, it wasn't uber expensive, but it's an automatic, still smells new and is very very shiny. It's also quite economical and relatively green. It's navy blue by the way.

DH is very very successful, one of the most successful in his field. He is very very proud to own and to drive a GWiZ. He thinks it's cool, it's green, it beats the congestion charge and he has subsidised parking space in central London.

What is utter nonsense. I am talking about spouses being trated as equals, irrespective of the make of car.

But it's just a material possession. I don't get all the hype over cars, they're just a method of getting from A to B, so long as it does so safely and comfortably does it really matter what it is?

Do you drive as many miles as your dh does? What do you drive now? Could you afford to equal top of the range cars?

As long as it is a safe car to get the children to and from school does it really matter?

it matters to me because I have been waiting months to get new car. and he is not prepared to get me the same as he has

yes he could afford it, but in his mind it would seem 'why should he'. He is the one earning the £s.

Well get a job and buy your own ffs.

He does have a point. It seems a waste of money.

You can't expect him to spend such a lot without questioning the need surely?

who cares

if it gets you from home to supermarket without waiting for the bus, fab

who cares about all the frills