to not pay twice for the teachers present?

[christmasturkey]

The class mum has informed me that I have not paid towards the teachers christmas present "as I have not signed the card". But I paid the day after she asked and did not sign a card because she didn't have one then. I feel so embarrassed as this woman is telling everyone i didn't pay but i really don't want to pay another 20 quid.
I asked her to check her money as maybe she is over but there is a chance she may have accidently spent it and so the money is not over?
Or shall I just pay again?

I collected money last year for the teachers and the TAs - It was a night mere but I wrote down all the people who contributed. I made it absolutely clear that this wasn't an obligatory contribution and that parents were under no obligation to cough up.

After I collected the cash, I wrote a cheque for the teacher for 200 quid for the teacher and 75 for the TA. Unbelievable.

In my book it was excessive, as we pay over 5K a year in fees.

This year I don't want to donate any money, the teacher this year is a sarcastic waggon, and very defensive with parents and manipulative of the children, but I'm not collecting, and the pressure to donate money for her is large. The parent who is collecting is very pushy, and has given no opt out, as I did last year.
It's a difficult one.

nightmare

Oh yes, I signed the card with every child's name anyway - a few parents didn't contribute to the teacher's piss-up fund, but I didn't leave them out of the card. I thought that would be nit picking and petty.

Good grief, is this for real, dc1's teacher is getting a small box of chocs to say thanks. £20 each??? DO NOT PAY IT AGAIN, YABU for paying it in the first place and even considering to pay the mardy cow again. Send your own card if she wont let you sign hers. Then pull her pigtails and kick her in the shins

underbeneathsies , I'm intrigued - how does she intend to compel you?

OK yes there is an update - We had an Ok conversation and I told her the day I gave her the money and what she was wearing etc
She said she was sorry must have lost it and would put the money in for me.
I said look if it's lost it's lost I don't want you to feel you're paying for me.
She then sent me a text apologising and could I sign the card today at pick up.
My friend reckons she found the money but she hasn't said that.
So a goodish ending and thanks for all your help and points everyone.
Merry christmas!

Well done. Did you say anything about her gossping about you?

No - I don't think anyone really listens to her tbh and anyway you can't really control what other people say about you.
She is not my friend as such so just want to be on friendly terms at school iyswim.

Make sure everyone you've heard from knows that she did apologise then. Well done again for keeping it dignified!

underbeneathsies - I think you should have a serious word with the head (or Governors) about the amount that is being collected, it is totally inappropriate and very difficult for people who don't want to spend that sort of money - also, perhaps you should mention that the teachers should be declaring such gifts for tax purposes .

Ha! It's a private school Ragwort.
Nobody knows who the shadowy governors are, let alone know where to meet up with them, and have a word. And the head is a total waste of space, being herself promoted from the teacher's ranks (def beyond her last point of competence).

When I was rep, I always said to parents, never mind if you want to do your own thing, but signed everyone on the card anyway.
This year's rep is far more by the book, and less accommodating to those who are strapped - you'd think the teacher is being bribed by the high security of the card and who gets to sign it. Come to think of it, maybe she is.... and noone wants to be left out...

Loving the idea of a tax declaration on gifts!

Well done christmasturkey, so glad it worked out for you .