to think that if you don't want people taking photos of your child in the school play don't let them be in it!

[2anddone]

Hi I am sure this has been done a hundred times before but I am so pissed off. DS had his school nativity play today and at the start we were told no photos or videoing was allowed. Typically enough it was the first school production where he hasn't cried. They are not filming the play or offering us any other ways to get a 'memory' of the play and the reason given was that 2 parents had requested no photos were allowed. This is not due to religious beliefs it was simply they didn't want other people taking photos of their dc. I know IAPBU but I don't care IMO if you don't want your child photographed in the play collect them early and don't let them be in it! Rant over

Mrs DV - I think you may be right. This thread is a carbon copy of one we were on this time last year.

I have a relative who escaped DV and has had to move several times due to parents/newpapers/etc taking pics and posting them online and them then being tracked down.

Surely a child has the right to live as normal a life as possible esp after experiencing something as horrific as some of the stories on here? and not taking any photos is a small price to ask?

does the OP know it wasn't due to medical reasons?

Do grown adults really get het up about this sort of thing? Really? I mean, you can't take a picture, at a couple of the many events your child will hopefully participate in over the years. A grip needs obtaining I think

I return to my previous question, how did our parents cope without the prolificacy of recording/photographic equipment we have now? Are we all traumatised? As one poster claimed earlier.

You know what I don't get? The contradiction in terms at the heart of some posts.

If being denied the opportunity to record someone else's nativity appearance is so agonising, then how can you conclude that it won't be upsetting for another child not to even get to appear?!

Either nativities and other school plays are really special and important, or they're not. But you can't argue both ways.

I'm quite old and have never had my picture in the paper or online once.
And even if a picture was online of me I wouldn't know where to start to look for it.
Check youtube for videos of schools and their inhabitants the whole site is heaving with kids making vids and slapping them up for the world to see.
And why isn't it a rule that covers all school plays and schools so parents could have a say in it?

Just get some pics of your child with the teacher and a few school mates who's parents are there, and say ok.

see Dd and ds3 are those dc that will mean you cna not take pictures of the school play as it is likely to mean that their school could be identfied there for exposing to large risks.The same risks that meant me and my dc had to flee a house which we lived in for 12 years with just a couple of suitcases on advice from the police after our house was targetted with petrol through the door that failed to ignite

So school state at the beginning that you mat take pictures of your own child after the event ,

Yes it is uosetting not to be able to video it but sorry be dam site more upsetting for me if my dc are harmed or killed and yes theres a chance of this , hence we had rl name changes .There is a contact ban restraining orders the whole lot which will last till they are 18

I have a child who is not mine biologically. I would not want photographs to be taken at school of him either.

The reason for this though is that we live extremely close to his BP's and his BM's family are extremely rough and troublesome. I have no doubt that he will end up going to school with some child known by their family if he goes to the local one here. Almost everyone I know uploads school play photos onto facebook as I've seen loads this week!

I do think facebook is the biggest problem here.

I am hoping to move away by the time he starts school though as I have a constant worry about it all. If we do end up moving completely out of the area then I wouldn't be at all bothered about photographs as I know they're not likely to be accessed by these people.

If his personal circumstances weren't as they are I wouldn't have any problem with photos at all.

So, some people do have their reasons and I think it would be more unfair to eliminate a child from a school play rather than tell parents not to take photos.

It's only since being on MN that I realise all the possible reasons for avoiding photos - stalkers/abusive exes etc. It is not just parents being precious.

That said, I do think it's unfair that every single other child and parent is 'penalised' for it. I would've been very sad if I'd not been able to take even far-off blurry snaps of DD in her play.

I think it would be reasonable to give everyone a photo opportunity at the end, after the finale/bows. They could say "no photos during the play as it will distract performers". 2 children could very easily be ushered off without anyone even noticing - even in our little school this would be easily achievable. And it wouldn't need to make the DCs feel bad, as they could be nominated for a special job to help the teachers, like holding a charity collection plate at the door or something. It's easily fixable and seems quite lazy to just do a blanket ban.

Pointy that's what dd school does and is done caregully so looks like dd is getting a treat infact couple other kids complain not fair :)

which im happy with . But think the op was complaing about she can not do while play is going on and on that case she is being unreasonable . Pretty sure she hate to read of a child injured or killed all for some pictures

It is bloody frustrating but the 'no photos/video' rule is there for good reason.

I would say the school are being unreasonable but not offering an alternative.

My DD is in yr 2 & her school have only just gone down the blanket ban on pics route sadly due to a rise in the number of children affected by it.

They usually put a video on their secure website for a week or two afterwards & send home photos of individual children, so we don't miss out and tbh I think it's nice to just enjoy the experience rather than spend it faffing about behind a camera/phone.

I would be fine with parents taking photos and videos if it was for their own viewing, but 99% of the time it ends up on Facebook, I have pictures of my DD on my page, but I don't have one person on it that I don't know in person.

Do YABVU take photos before and after.

I just caught up with this thread again and was highly amused by the following comment from the thoroughly misnamed Niceguy.

"I see I'm getting the usual insults and being accused of not getting it, selfish and worse."

The clue is in the word "usual". If you are "usually" accused of not getting it or being selfish perhaps it might be an idea to examine your attitudes and see if the problem is really everyone else misunderstanding poor you.

It is a small price to pay.

No one is allowed to take pics in my ds class because my ds and I fled 300 miles to escape abusive ex. Thank your lucky stars that you clearly have no idea what this entails.

I remember about 9 yrs ago around this time of year i was in work and about 5 of us were outside having our coffee break when a car pulled up and a man shot out and demanded we tell him where the womens hostage was.

It was just round the corner from our work but noone really knew whereabouts it was,we just blanked him and he called us stupid bitches and stormed back to his car.

I dread to think what he would have done if he found it,we went back inside straight away and our boss rung WA to tell them to let our local refuge now there was a nutter asking round.

If one child can feel as safe and secure as my child then i for one will not take any photos on school property.

zombie thread klaxon