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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to think that if you don't want people taking photos of your child in the school play don't let them be in it!

319 replies

2anddone · 12/12/2011 15:52

Hi I am sure this has been done a hundred times before but I am so pissed off. DS had his school nativity play today and at the start we were told no photos or videoing was allowed. Typically enough it was the first school production where he hasn't cried. They are not filming the play or offering us any other ways to get a 'memory' of the play and the reason given was that 2 parents had requested no photos were allowed. This is not due to religious beliefs it was simply they didn't want other people taking photos of their dc. I know IAPBU but I don't care IMO if you don't want your child photographed in the play collect them early and don't let them be in it! Rant over Xmas Angry

OP posts:
Familydilemma · 12/12/2011 21:29

Take a pic of your child in their costume just before or afterwards. I was allowed to photograph dd's play the other day. Nothing usable and I wish I'd been soaking it up rather than trying to take pictures.

Dustinthewind · 12/12/2011 22:17

I'm a bit fed up with the number of posters who are saying stuff 'em, take the photos anyway. Symptomatic of the same mindset who park on zig-zag lines, complain about inconvenient children with sn and have little thought or compassion for the needs of others.
No one else needs to be considered, only the little emperor/empress of the selfish parent.

Ihavewelliesbutitssunny · 12/12/2011 22:54

I know this has already been said over and over but YABVU OP. And anything that even highlights which children cannot be photographed should not be allowed. For example doing a dress rhearsal and taking photos but excluding the children who can't be photographed. Sometimes the children may not be aware that they can't be photographed or the reasons why and the peers certainly wouldn't and shouldn't. Often these decisions are made by social services/courts so it is not simply a case of parents being awkward.

MuddlingMackem · 12/12/2011 22:58

ilovesooty Mon 12-Dec-11 20:52:38

Children's safety outweighs any desire to take photos/film for an absent parent. Surprised so many can't understand that.

A1980 · 12/12/2011 23:08

You kind of brought it on yourselves. It is no longer enough to take a photo, print and put it in an album to remember what your DC's and their classmates were like. Now it has to go on facebook and christ knows what other websites to show the world. I have a cousin I've met once who lives abroad in the USA. She has two children and I think I know when they both last pissed and shat given the things she posts about them online. Sickly messages: well done my baby for doing well in your dance contest. Loads of messages leading up to the dance contest, photos of her modelling outfits and telling everyone where it would take place. what mnakes it worse is that her entire profile is public. She posts loads of photos of her friends DC's and inforamtion about them. it's shocking how much inforamtion you can discover about utter strangers.

It's a shame you can't have photos of the play itself but you can't control what people will do with it afterwards. So YABU.

A1980 · 12/12/2011 23:10

Lets not also forget that the play would probably be spoiled if every single parent turned up with a video camera et al. Endless flashes and people walking around trtying to take pictures. good god, just sit down and watch. That is the whole point of it!

lockets · 12/12/2011 23:17

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

blackeyedsanta · 12/12/2011 23:17

some children need protecting from abusive parents/others. pictures on the internet can endanger their safety.

school should have provided another option though.

demetersdaughter · 12/12/2011 23:46

I can't see what's wrong with parents taking pics of school plays.
But I suppose people are just looking for excuses with the safety angle.
Strangely though schools find room to video plays etc and sell the vids/dvds making a mockery of the reasons why they don't want people taking pics.
In 10 years time parents of today will be explaining what their kids were like in infant school because nobody will have the pics for memories.

lockets · 13/12/2011 00:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

KateFrothers · 13/12/2011 00:20

demetersdaughter I can't see what's wrong with parents taking pics of school plays.

Is this because you cannot read the thread, because you are rather thick or because you are lacking in imagination?

I am interested. Call it a social experiment if you like.

demetersdaughter · 13/12/2011 00:26

KateFrothers

Great insight into your mind there (Or lack of)
My opinion mirrors that of many others on this thread.
Put the shandy down you're in over your head :)

KateFrothers · 13/12/2011 00:29

Oh dear. I'm gonna score you a Must Try Harder Smile

lockets · 13/12/2011 00:36

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

olivestanssister · 13/12/2011 00:44

Are you two like a mini gang of illiterate school drop-outs?
If you are you're great at it.
That was not a compliment even though you probably thought it was :)

CocktailQueen · 13/12/2011 00:52

Our school says you can video/take photos but not post them on facebook or anyhwre public.

KateFrothers · 13/12/2011 01:07

Are you talking to me olive? If so you will be able to see I am not illiterate (look! writing!) and how is being a school drop-out an insult?

I'm rather proud of what I've achieved despite the odds.

olivestanssister · 13/12/2011 01:09

I wonder what those odds are?
Perhaps my guesses would be too obvious.
Considering your aspirations are probably not too high i'd say you nearly reached them.
Puff your chest out while I pin a golden (Well done) star on your jutting forehead.

pinkyp · 13/12/2011 01:12

I think it's very sad too. ESP as class photos (with names) are printed in local papers Sad

KateFrothers · 13/12/2011 01:14

olive what's your problem?

I am curious what you think those odds are. Go on, have a guess.

Oh, and what do you think my aspirations are?

olivestanssister · 13/12/2011 01:15

Katefrothers thinks that there are good reasons why schools can print the photos in papers and online (Where you buy them) whilst a parent can't even take a picture.
But kates done well you know.
She said so :)

olivestanssister · 13/12/2011 01:17

I'd say your aspirations are limited and your abilities to reach those aspirations are just as limited.
Sit still i'm aiming the golden star at your jutting forehead and you keep whining.

KateFrothers · 13/12/2011 01:18

Oh really Olive, pray tell, where did I say that?

pmsl.

KateFrothers · 13/12/2011 01:19

Come on Olive. Don't be shy, tell me what my aspirations and abilities are please. I could do with a laugh.

confuddledDOTcom · 13/12/2011 01:22

This is going to sound OT, I think, but it's not.

Facebook asked me the other day where some pictures were taken. They were scanned pictures of me in hospital, looked rather generic hospital, I thought, Facebook knew which hospital I was in. I always thought it was to do with digital pictures but it scares me it can work out the location of a scanned picture.

I agree with the idea of having set ups for parents who want pictures of their children.