Please or to access all these features

Add post

Watch this thread

Save thread

Start a new thread

Flip thread

Hide thread

My feed

Active Unanswered threads

Getting started FAQ's

Unanswered threads Acronyms Talk guidelines

Hide shortcut buttons

Talk

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

See all MNHQ comments on this thread

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6

Original poster

Orgasm during childbirth?

148 replies

WorraLiberty · 05/12/2011 10:31

Am I being unreasonable to think this is possibly the last thing on the mind of any sane woman while she's trying to push a melon out of a mouse hole?

Apparently 22% of the Mums she studied, orgasmed during childbirth....though she didn't say how many she actually studied.

My mind is truly boggled

OP posts:

megapixels · 05/12/2011 15:41

Me too. I didn't feel terrified, but I did feel exhausted and in more pain than I thought possible. Not quite the right atmosphere for an orgasm sadly.

GreenIceAndChristmasHam · 05/12/2011 15:43

Orgasm during childbirth? Not likely.

Although I did feel like lighting up a fag and basking in a rosy glow after having my first postnatal poo (seven days constipated)

amicissima · 05/12/2011 15:45

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

HecateGoddessOfTheNight · 05/12/2011 15:46

I didn't find it remotely enjoyable, pushing a 10 and a half pound baby from my poor fanjo (and then again 15 months later!). The slithering out bit after the head was born was the oddest sensation, but not what I'd call orgasmic.

But hell, if some women do - lucky them!

TheScaryJessie · 05/12/2011 15:47

Sure, maybe you would have. Or maybe you would have felt unable to do anything.

But if you are of the opinion that someone was sexually assaulted, "well, I would have bloody done something about it" comments are really unpleasant. Even crossed out. It just contributes to and supports our culture's victim-blaming mentality.

MardyArsedMidlander · 05/12/2011 15:52

I think it's more that it's very difficult to be assertive when one is in pain, exhausted and not entirely sure what is going on. But for a midwife to do that- whatever her motives- is sexual assault. And just because her clients are probably too bewilidered to register it as such, doesn't mean it shouldn't be flagged up.

Get0rf · 05/12/2011 15:56

I would have been furious as well if a midwife has started clitoral stimulation. I don't really care how effective it was - to do that without asking is violation in my book.

LineRunnerCrouchingReindeer · 05/12/2011 16:06

How very fucking insane.

DartsAgain · 05/12/2011 16:08

The only problem I can forsee with the idea of a birth orgasm, is that some first time mums-to-be, the sort who hanker after the perfect birth experience will now feel cheated if it doesn't happen after they've written it into their beautifully detailed birth plan

HecateGoddessOfTheNight · 05/12/2011 16:22

beautifulblonde - erm, love, I'm really not sure your midwife was supposed to do that to you!

Ghoulwithadragontattoo · 05/12/2011 16:30

Beautifulblonde - I also agree that what your midwife did was unprofessional. How do you feel about it now?

BeautifulBlondePineapple · 05/12/2011 16:36

Just to clear things up - she might well have asked me if I minded her trying this out...I can't properly remember. If I had been uncomfortable with it, I would have said something.

This midwife was fantastic - very encouraging & positive. There was definitely no sexual motive that I could fathom and I do not believe that the aim of the stimulation was for me to have an orgasm during labour (if indeed that is possible!).

ThereIsNoSpoon · 05/12/2011 16:38

-'ve has 4 children. The whole way through my secondabour I was so high on my own endorphins that I didn't think I was in labour. Each contraction towards the end brought on extreme orgasm. I ended up giving birth the second I got onto thetreatment bed because I left it so long.

People are often quite taken aback when I tell them.

ThereIsNoSpoon · 05/12/2011 16:39

Apologies for spelling and spacing- my new phone's taking some getting used to!

Malificence · 05/12/2011 16:41

My MW had her hand wrist deep in my vagina, massaging a lip on my cervix while I was desperately trying not to push, that didn't seem remotely strange, however if she'd been rubbing my clitoris I would have decked her. That's akin to her sucking on your nipples, seriously not on.

BeautifulBlondePineapple · 05/12/2011 16:42

GoulWithadragontattoo - I still feel absolutely fine about it. Despite some of the comments here, I am perfectly happy with the conduct of the midwife.

It was a great birth...I remember raving to my friends like a loon about what a positive experience it had been (unlike DC1's birth).

OK - hijack over. Carry on as you were...

GlueSticksEverywhere · 05/12/2011 16:44

I remember during labour part of the midwives hand brushing against my clitoris and it freaked me out! Direct rubbing? . . .

Ghoulwithadragontattoo · 05/12/2011 16:49

I agree with you Malificence - of course midwifes get more up close and personal with your fanjo than anyone else. BUT clitoral stimulation seems to on a whole different plane to that. I'm not sure BBP's midwife should have done that even with consent as I just can't imagine it ever being appropriate (and of course you're not at your most rational when labouring). As I understand it midwives touch you as little as they can to deliver baby safely and minimise damage to the mother.

NotMyBigFatFault · 05/12/2011 16:51

Whoa!

Ghoulwithadragontattoo · 05/12/2011 16:51

BBP's - sorry crossed posts there. I'm glad you had a positive birth experience. I still don't think the midwife should have done it though...

MrsRhettButler · 05/12/2011 16:57

Dd2 didn't hurt coming out and I do NOT have a big 'area'

when they told me the head was out I didn't believe them!

I wasnt sore after either

HecateGoddessOfTheNight · 05/12/2011 17:06

I do

My first child was 10lb4oz. My second could have walked out.

In fact, the midwife could have gone in to fetch him.

MrsRhettButler · 05/12/2011 17:58

Hecate!

usingapseudonym · 05/12/2011 18:06

Wow I want one. Changed plan from hb to MLU though, not sure I want to stimulate anything in front of anyone.....

nativitywreck · 05/12/2011 20:34

Oooh, I have put the cat among the pigeons suggesting that some of you may be well endowed in the downstairs department.
I was only joking ! (Or was I?)
Anyway,like I said, if you are not before birth you probably are after.

I wouldn't care if the midwife had a right good fiddle, if it helped with the pain. I might suggest it if I ever do it again. Go on love, knock yerself out.

Flip

1 2 3 4 5 6